summer 2011

summer 2011

Paul and I, all 16 kids and Ashley, Benjamin's wife...Christmas 2012

Paul and I, all 16 kids and Ashley, Benjamin's wife...Christmas 2012

Friday, January 9, 2015

the little things...

As we all know, it's the little things that add up to the most importance. Little decisions day in and day out, about what I put in my mouth. And about what comes out of my mouth. Sometimes I can't help the little things that come flying out with no forethought, but then there are the things that I roll around in my mind....

I can agree with little thoughts that miffed me. I can build a little case in my mind, because after all, I had only the best intentions, and why would they say that to me? But those little thoughts can destroy friendships. Agreeing with them tears down relationships. No one can see in there, what we allow into our hearts. But God can, and when we walk in the light, and cleanse ourselves from all that sin, those bad thoughts, then we get happy. It doesn't matter who says what to me or about me. I am free. It isn't fun, because, hey, I want everyone to just plain like me! But I am so very thankful for these verses "Make every effort to live in peace with all men and be holy;, without holiness no one will see the Lord. See to it that no one misses the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble, and defile many." (Hebrews 12, 14 and 15.)

It is hard and miserable, to hate. It is free and light, to love. We get to choose.

This fine sunny cold winter morning, we have been lazy. I slept until 9:00, which isn't as grand as it sounds, I wrestled some thoughts all night last night. Oh, the dismal scenarios that plagued me! It seemed like a Testing Of My Faith night. I would reason myself out of worrying about Paul's heart procedure, then I would think about car repairs and then dang it, home school reports are due soon. And then I would go back to those thoughts I had about someone thinking things of me....and so on. I had to do some praying. But I finally fell asleep.

Someday each of us will stand before God. No matter if we believe it or not, it's going to happen. There will be no place to hide. I know I'll be pretty nervous, I don't even like airport security, and driving over the border to Canada gets me stammering. But seriously, I want to live my life with this in mind. Winning an argument, proving myself right, whatever seems so important at the time...those are things I'm sure I would be ashamed of...if my heart was full of them when I stood before God.

Yesterday...I took Kathryn to the thrift store. She likes to buy old jeans and make them into cool shorts. I bought a really nice sweater, a pair of jeans for myself, a pile of books...for $22. Then to the grocery store for oats, yogurt, peppers, bananas, carrots, milk, tea, butter, bread, and popcorn kernels.

Home: I had put a turkey in the oven, it was done and the house smelled holiday-ish. Putting away the groceries and getting dinner fixed was hurried, I had to get out the door by 6:30 to go to a meeting about an upcoming church feast. I microwaved a huge bowl of fresh broccoli, and then some potatoes. I didn't even "gravy" up the gravy, just served it as is. It was a yummy meal, and I am thankful for Joseph, who had the unenviable task of taking all of the meat off the carcass (isn't that just a lovely word for something you just ate from?), and for some teenage girls who cleaned up for me...Paul called me from work and had lost his keys. Then called, he found them. Then called, the car wouldn't start. Then called, it did. Okay. He confirmed he wouldn't be going to the meeting with me, I was late, so out the door I went. Life isn't boring, that's for sure.

Abigail has to go to the bank, so she is going to bring the little girls so they can cash in all their change. Jon wants to go to because Abigail is his very best friend. I want to go too because, well, it's a cold sunny winter's morning, and I want to get out of the house and hang out with Abigail too!


Martha said...

Your post is timely, kind of as though the Lord is reaffirming things He's already told me in the past few days. Choices; good and bad, they make up the legacy we leave behind.

At our Ladies' Bible study Tuesday morning, the pastor's wife talked about how spending time with the Lord in prayer and Bible study is communicating with Him and getting to know Him. When we meet Him face to face, it won't be scary, because we have already been gotten to know Him. (Can't say it just like she did) My mind spun to my cross country trip to stay with my friend Wanda and how even though I had a little apprehension at the journey, the sight of her smiling at me from the bottom of the escalator and her wrapping me in her arms erased any fear. But we'd already come to know each other beforehand. I knew her heart, I knew some of her thoughts, and I knew we had a common bond in Christ. It wasn't like meeting someone I didn't know, but rather like going home to Mom. I think that must be why God is called our Father, because it'll be like going home, even though we've never been there before.

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