summer 2011

summer 2011

Paul and I, all 16 kids and Ashley, Benjamin's wife...Christmas 2012

Paul and I, all 16 kids and Ashley, Benjamin's wife...Christmas 2012
family

Friday, July 31, 2009

rainy friday morning....

I got up and took a shower this morning. If that sounds simple and straightforward, it wasn't. Camille was in her little green bed, feeling very offended that I didn't take her into the bathroom with me. She doesn't understand that I can get it done twice as fast without her trying to empty the q-tips and brush her teeth with shampoo. Anyway, the day has started, and the kids are watching "Clifford"....we have to pack some more things, as we are moving into the camper tonight for the week. I have so many things to remember....

It was wonderful to see my girls last night. And, they brought me a bar of German chocolate. And yes, I did share. It was sad though, because the airlines they flew on the way home had different weight restrictions on the luggage, and those poor girls had to face a huge surcharge or jettison some cargo....which sounds simple, but when it's your white shirt from Target and 2 pair of flip-flops and all of your underwear...they had to pick what to toss. It was sad. A bottle of shampoo, not even opened. Ouch. Mirielle says she is never flying ryan air again. So there.

My Camille is fussing, I need to move......I don't know when I will be writing again.....

Thursday, July 30, 2009

two years of blogging for me....

And I still love it. I remember when I started, I was pregnant for Camille, and I didn't know how to put pictures up. Aaron put the pics up of when she was born, and sometime after that I learned how myself. Sometimes when I sit down and write, I sort things out for myself, and put things in perspective. Daily life can seem overwhelming sometimes, and I can tend to focus on trying to get things under control instead of what is really important: getting saved in the situations.....there are so many opportunities to humble myself during the day! To be more connected to God....

My beautiful girls are coming home tonight! Mirielle and Mali! Paul is going to pick them up at the airport, the one they are flying in to is a good hour from here. I remember how long ago it seemed when Mirielle asked me if that was all right because the tickets were cheap...."sure, honey, fine"....then when it was all said and done, I was like, "What! We have to take you all the way over there!"....ha. short term memory. Anyway, Paul is going to get them...and tomorrow, we are all leaving for summer conference. I imagine the girls will have a mountain of laundry, or at least two suitcases anyway, so I should do what I need to do today.

Anyway, today I thought I would write a list titled, "Things I Love"....

1. I love how Charlotte Claire wants MOMMY to tuck her into bed at night. She has this Fisher-Price aquarium thing on the side of her crib (I got it at the Salvation Army a few years ago for $2 , and it still works....)...she always has to turn it to the music and lights, and have her blankets just so, and sleep with what ever toy or dolly she has been playing with...she sometimes has like fifty toys in her crib when I go to tuck her in....she does this thing where she wakes up really early and fills the crib with toys, then makes a nest on the floor and goes back to sleep....or she climbs out at night and turns on the light and plays....she is just such a funny little kid.

2. I love bargains. When something is buy one get two free, or 75% off.....it is just nice.

3. I love it when the kids start talking about how they are going to be good and get along better or keep their room clean from now on!! ha. But I still love it.

4. I love getting up before everyone else in the morning, and having some quiet. I also like staying up later than everyone else, but that is nearly impossible lately. They have been doing this Lord Of The Rings movie marathon, and they are still eating snacks and watching when I head to bed, this week.....

5. I love it when someone else cooks dinner once in a while....Paul did last night, sort of. His mom had brought over zuchini with sausage and tomatoes....he cooked pasta, and served the kids....I totally missed dinner, except for some of the clean-up.....(no, the little kids did not like the zuchini and sausage dish...but I LOVE it)

6. I love Rosie. Even though I seriously considered listing her on craigslist more than once, I love her like crazy. She makes me smile when she sits there with her head turned to the side, trying to figure something out....she never just squats and pees in the house anymore, but if she doesn't go before she comes in, she will pee in pure excitement just because she is happy...or if I tell her NO sometimes, she will pee...she came in the other day and jumped right up on my nice red couch! I told her NO, get down, so she rolled to her back and peed! Right on the couch! (see what I mean about craigslist?)........but I love her....she is just so loyal and happy and rewarding....

7. I love the two cats. I feel sorry for them, as they are terrified of Rosie...so far, my "introducing the kitties to the puppy" mission has been a dismal failure, nothing but scratches to show for it....

8. I love how excited the kids are about the summer conference. They have all these plans. Charlotte Claire says she is inviting her cousins Danielle and Seany-boy to her camper to play.

9. Of course I love my husband. He is kind and funny and handsome and sweet and reliable and responsible and forgiving and peaceful. He loves his guitar and his music and he takes it so well that he rarely gets time for them....he is a giver, mostly of his time, but also of his money.

10. I love a blank day. That's why I love summer so much....

11. I love my kids of course and my friends, and my church...and most of all, I love God. I love that He has chosen to bless me with His word, and blessed my with all of these kids.....


And in all these things, of course there are trials. Charlotte Claire is playing with a roll of tape, the cat wants out, the pup is hungry, the kids are waking up....this won't be an easy day, but it will be a rewarding day.....

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

recovering from the beach...

The sunset itself wasn't as spectacular as can be, but the sky was still beautiful....Lake Ontario, the eastern shore......

The older kids had some fun together....


Kathryn with Charlotte Claire...




Evelyn with Camille


Jonathan in his own little lake







Now, going to the beach is nice and relaxing, so why would one have to "recover", you might ask...well,.....let's see. Kim, my sister-in-law, brought 7 of hers, 2 of our friends' kids, the girl visiting from Norway, then I brought 10 of mine and two of my sister's. Now, they aren't all exactly children, there were 3 sixteen year olds and and two seventeen year olds, then all younger than that.....and of course the little ones need constant parental supervision. I had Charlotte Claire and Jonathan playing in the sand and playing in the water, and then the crazy Camille, who at 20 months old, has no fear of water, and thought laying back and having a wave go over her face was great fun. I think I got some grey hair. The other kids were swimming but had partners, and we were watching them too. The waves weren't too big, (they can get huge there sometimes), and there was a lifeguard on the beach as well as in a chair in the water. The older kids played alot of volleyball and frisbee. It was great fun, just gorgeous, perfect temperature (in the eighties, sunny, breezy but not windy).....but just not exactly relaxing. We had sandwiches for lunch, and cooked dinner on the grill. Aaron prepared the charcoal, and helped me grill burgers, hot dogs and hot sausage....I cut up some cucumbers and Kim cut up some cantaloupes....we had tons of chips and snacks. After dinner, we headed back to the water's edge.....the lifeguards had left, so the bigger kids were taking full advantage and playing volleyball in the water and on the beach....we let some of the kids go back in swimming, but only in the shallow water.....I snuggled with Camille for a bit, and we watched the sunset.....so that meant it was getting dark as we cleaned up (we had taken 5 picnic tables, and they were all covered with water bottles and towels and cups and stuff...).....and I wish I could say the ride home was peaceful and relaxing, but nah. Camille, for some reason, was so exhausted she didn't sleep, she cried.
And the cute little matching green bathing suits that my two youngest wore? Both in the garbage....yeah, I am a wimp....first Camille did an awful poop, then Charlotte Claire....right in the bathing suit....bathing suits are cheap enough right now, I just threw them away. Isn't that awful? My mother never would have done that, but then, we never would have pooped in our suits. My mother simply wouldn't allow that.
Speaking of my mother, she died three years ago yesterday. I still miss her, and being at this beach reminded me of her and my dad so much, since we practically grew up there. We camped there every summer, all summer, then they bought a camp when I was 9, right down the beach from there....so when I am there, I feel like I belong there.....
Well, that was my yesterday....today I stayed home for part of the day...the kids were tired, and glad for a rainy day...although it was very humid. I did some laundry, and cleaned up and swept and sweated. Then my mother-in-law called and said she had some zuchini and sausage for us...she came for a little visit. Then I went shopping a bit with just my sister, just her and I. I was going to go with my sis-in-law, but then I was going to stay home, then my sister said she needed to go east, which is a good shopping direction, so off we went. And I replaced the bathing suits....and got the girls some cheap clothes from Target. Tops for $1.75....and then a few things from the grocery store...and home. Paul had just finished with dinner with the kids, and he left for cleaning the meeting hall with the older kids....so I just sat with the younger ones and talked and gave them some Reeses' Peanut Butter Cups. They are so excited about the upcoming summer conference, they love staying in the camper....they pack so much stuff...as if we have room for it all....
Well, I am tired....Camille slept fitfully last night......she woke up plenty of times....

Monday, July 27, 2009

watch those kids in the pool!!!!

In this post, I am going to give a general exhortation to all moms and dads: watch the kids every single second in the pool. Don't get relaxed because they can swim. Today, we had a scare....we went swimming at the pools at our conference center, at church. I had found some neat things in my closet, including a little inflatable boat-style safety swim seat, designed for one year olds, according to the package. So we tried it with Camille, with me right with her, of course. She did not like it. So we put her in her usual suit with the foam panels, and an inflatable ring on to of that....and I always stay right near her. I also have to stay right near Charlotte Claire, who wears the foam suit too, but still sputters a bit sometimes....anyway, Jonathan, who also wears one of the foam panel suits, decided to try out the little boat float. He was in the smaller pool, not too far away from the bigger pool, where I was with the rest of the kids....Margaret was over there skimming the bugs....so I let him go over there...usually if I am there by myself, I have them all in one pool or the other....so, Jon was floating around...and I was watching the girls, right in the pool with them...I looked over at the other pool, and the boat had flipped, Jon's feet were in the air, his head in the water....I started screaming for Margaret to get him get him, as I started to race out of the pool...I couldn't let go of Camille, I yelled for Margaret to jump in. I just screamed it, and she just jumped right in, fully clothed (so much for not swimming today, eh Margaret?).....she flipped him over, and he gasped a bit and coughed, but he hadn't been under for very long, it seemed....he wasn't blue or vomiting or unresponsive in any way...but I was like jelly, so was Margaret....and poor Jon didn't go back in swimming at all. He is five years old, and swims like a fish with that suit on....I am so thankful that I saw him as soon as I did. They say that drowning is the silent killer, and I guess it is....no warning, just happened to see him floundering like that. Horrifying, the thought of what might have happened. So, watch your kids. Keep them close. (and don't use those little boats!)(the thing is, he is so big, his legs were completely stuck in the legholes...I shouldn't have let him use it, but who would have thought?) So if you have a pool, go out there in the water with the kids...don't stay in the house and watch out the window or door, it just ain't worth it! (I have also noticed that older siblings, unless they are like 17 or 18, will not watch the kids like a mom would....and also if anything happened on their watch, how could you deal with that?)

Today was a running around day, again...I took the eight youngest with me to Walmart, the store I love to hate, and got some things I need for our church conference next week...I bought lots and lots of cookies to frost, and some knives and plates...I already have the frosting and sprinkles. And I got some stuff for us....we then drove the stuff out and put it in the camper....and it poured. No thunder and lightening, just a downpour....and just like that it was over, and the sky was blue again....very neat.

We had a simple dinner of grilled ham and cheese sandwiches and salad, and ice water. The I took the little girls outside and blew bubbles with them...and let them go in their little froggy pool with some bubbles in it....they didn't bother with their suits, and they were so cute....then we cleaned out the van...how on earth does it get SO messy? Well, one reason could be because we practically live in there....I don't bother to make declarations like "We are NEVER eating in there again!" anymore, because I know we will eat in there like tomorrow. So I just said, "We are NEVER eating cheese crackers in there again!"....but the stuff we find in there...crayons and hair things and barbie shoes and note books and matchbox cars and fries....and water bottles and baby bottles and jackets and sweaters and extra shoes and flip-flops....and the thing is, whenever we get home from anywhere, I ask everyone to please bring in what they brought, plus anything else they see that needs to go in....I guess my kids have horrible vision. Anyway, we dragged over the big garbage can, and filled it up so far I don't want to say, and we just cleaned and vaccumed this van not too long ago. I then brought out the Dirt Devil, and it was pathetic, so I brought out my prized Dyson, which is so amazing....I vacuumed it all up, and though it doesn't look brand new, it looks presentable, and beautiful to me....just in time to : Go
to the beach tomorrow!!!! We are going to the best beach I have been to so far, on the eastern shore of Lake Ontario. We are bringing one of Margaret's friends, and another girl who is helping her friend's family this summer, and she is from Norway. She has only been to the beach once since she has been here, and it rained. So, I am taking her to a wonderful beach. We have two seats left in the 15 passenger van, if Ellen and Audrey want to go.....

Well, it is late and I am tired and I wanted to do more packing for tomorrow but I am too tired from today.....so, I'll do it tomorrow. It is supposed to be in the high eighties and sunny tomorrow. What a day for a long ride in a packed van with no air conditioning......oh well, we are going to the beach!!!! And we will get the van all sandy and crumby and maybe we will eat McDonalds food on the way home.....and I will grump about it later.....because I never learn...that's why I have so much fun!

Saturday, July 25, 2009

God gives grace to the humble...

I am thankful for the work that God is doing in me. I have a fear of being proud, I do not want God to be opposed to me. God is very faithful to show me how I really am. Sometimes I wonder if I am giving the wrong impression on here, that I am so capable or patient or just plain happy about everything. By nature, I am so selfish. So lazy. But I am learning. I am learning to give up and sacrifice and humble myself. God sends things to crush my high and mighty thoughts. And I am very thankful for that. I was thinking today about my washing machine. It doesn't always spin well, so when I go to throw the clothes in the dryer, or hang them up on the deck, they are soaked. I have to set the machine to "spin" again...and sometimes I have to do it all day long before they spin. So, when I open the machine and they have spinned on the first try, and are ready to just go in the dryer, I am so thankful! For something that is usually just taken for granted.......the thing is, our water pressure is awful these days...our pool just isn't filling. It is standing there, all alluring with the spankin' new blue liner, and the water is only a bit above the ankles. That is with leaving the hose on all night for at least three nights. ...and turning it on during the day when we remember to.....when it is on, there is no water in the house..so no laundry....so, I am behind on the laundry........really behind....anyway, this impatience and frustration are serious things....seeing myself, dealing with this stuff inside, that is much more important than laundry. I have been seeing lately how I tend to judge people without really even realizing it....I don't think they are wise with their children, or watch them closely enough, or keep good enough track of what they are doing....and then I find out one of my own kids was doing something I didn't even see....ouch. I just need to really be awake to the criticism I have in me. It is a beautiful thing, really, to see myself so clearly....like once and a while God just opens my eyes wider than ever and, ouch, there I am. How can I judge when I have a proper knowledge of just how it is with me? And how can I complain when God has been sooo good to me? It seems that complaining is just in every layer of my being. I can barely open my mouth sometimes without a complaint about this or that coming out....But praise be to God that He is working with me! I don't have to be depressed or distressed, for their is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus....

It takes more than food and shelter to raise children, it takes patience and wisdom, which only come from God. It always seem to take WAY more patience and wisdom that I posess, so I have to be turning to God......which is a good thing.

The kids (Margaret, Kathryn, Evelyn, Suzanne, Sonja, Jon, and two of Margaret's friends, Bettina and Phoebe) are in the hot tub....they are yelling at the dog...I don't know what she could possibly be doing. Maybe stealing towels?

When is the corn going to be ripe? Sweet corn, the best food on the planet....maybe because it is only available in late July/August. Paired up with some steak on the grill, and wow. We have some steak in the 'fridge defrosting.....it has been $1.99 lb. at PriceChopper for sirloin steak. That is cheaper than hamburger! Maybe I enjoy it so much because when I was growing up, we never ever had it. Once in a while my parents would splurge and get one steak and cut it all up....and we would each get some little pieces. We didn't have a very big dinner tonight, but we did have pan-popped popcorn with butter....but for some reason I am very hungry. But I am not going to have anything...I will just write about yummy things.....like the candy bar from Switzerland that Emily sent to me...it says on it in black marker, "For Mom only, do not share!" (and no, I did not write it, Emily did!) The other bar she sent, she wrote, "For everyone else..." Hopefully I count in the everyone else category, because I did have some...it was very wonderful....oh, I hope Mirielle and Mali bring me some French chocolate, and some German chocolate...(they are staying three days in Frankfurt)....and some more Norwegian chocolate...Aaron and Sam brought some of that....it makes Hershey's taste pretty bland. Although I still like Hershey's. Nestles, nah, not so much. Especially Crunch bars....not exactly YUCK, just not so great. I would eat one if I were in an afternoon chocolate craving, and it was all I had.....with a cup of coffee, of course...

Well, I am starting to bore myself silly....oh, the good thing about having 4 of your kids across the ocean is that you can look forward to having them come home! Mali and Mirielle will be coming in on Thursday! Joseph in a few months, then Emily hopefully by Christmas! And Abigail, who isn't across the ocean, but 35 minutes away staying with a friend who is having a baby next month, and her husband is in the military, will be home by September, too. Yay. Oh, may I truly listen to my children, small and grown.....may I have wisdom to help them, to turn them to God....and may He hear our prayers and preserve them from this world we live in.......

I should have named this post, "Ramblings of a distracted mother"....I have been interupted no less than twenty times while writing it. There was a slug on the patio near the hot tub! Phoebe picked it up! They kicked Evelyn out! Jon stubbed his toe on the way to brush his teeth. Suzanne came out from bed for a cup of ice..(my spoiled kids, they get a cup of ice instead of a drink of water). Suze couldn't find underwear....mom, mom, mom.....ah well, it is kind of funny to be tested in the very things I write about as I write them.....

Friday, July 24, 2009

just pictures....

Camille saw this pretty dress hanging up and wanted to wear it....she felt pretty. She was jumping on the couch, which is not allowed.... Good thing she's cute!
And she IS cute....her hair has gotten so blonde this summer...







Evelyn Joy..





We love Rosie!





Aaron loves Rosie, too....
And that is it...





sorry, I totally forgot...

to say thank you to all of you who left such nice and encouraging comments....it has been on my heart to say thanks, then I forgot when I posted this morning. So, Thank You!!!

Today I ended up going out and about....what happened was kind of funny....Evelyn, Suzanne, Sonja, and Jonathan share a room. It is small, and it gets messy. Very messy. They decided to clean their room today. They got it clean enough to vacuum, which means lots of stuff is stuffed under the beds. So Evelyn starts asking where the vacuum cleaner is. We didn't use it yesterday...hmm. Last time I used it was to vacuum the camper UH-OH! Did we leave it outside at the camper? Rats. I had been wanting to go get some things at Wal-mart and bring them out to the camper anyway, but was making myself stay home and gets some stuff done here....so, I decided to go to Walmart, and then to the camper....I can't just go to Walmart, I have to check the dollar store, too...they had HonesTea for 6/$1....and it doesn't expire until the end of August. I got three twelve packs. And some more candy for summer conference. And some Hannah Montana tween bras for the girls...(oops, they will kill me for this...but I didn't say which girls, did I?)...then out to the camper, and thankfully the vac was INSIDE the camper.....I was so glad....because it is the beautiful and wonderful Dyson, and if it had gotten rained on, I would be using the old yellow Dirt Devil. . Anyway, I brought a bunch of stuff to the camper, Evelyn, Sonja, and I put it all away, and came back home. Just in time to make dinner, which was tacos, since we still had so much taco meat from last night's taco salad. Black olives, green peppers, tomatoes, lettuce, cheese, Vidalia onions, Frank's hot sauce, salsa.....oh dear, do I love food, or what? The best chips that exist, in my humble opinion, are the Tostitos with Lime.....in a taco saldad, oh yum. And I splurged and got a few bottles of Diet Coke to go with dinner. Lots of ice, yum. and so healthy..ha.

The trouble with getting up in the morning and staying busy all day is that when you sit down in the evening, it is almost impossible to get back up. Not that I don't sit down all day, I do, but somehow when it is after dinner clean up, I have no more energy. But it comes from somewhere, because there is still much to do....these kids don't run out of steam for a few hours yet.....

And there is a commotion in the bathroom, so off I go....

I had a day off...

From blogging, that is. Yesterday was a rainy day, and we were going to stay home because we have been "rammin" around, as my dad used to say. But we were out of milk. With all that good cereal, that is just plain torture. Not to mention my teeny tiny baby Camille, now 20 months old, still has a few ba-ba's a day. Which Charlotte Claire steals when we are not looking, or she sweet talks Camille into sharing with her....anyway, we needed milk and bread and bananas....fresh stuff.

So off we went. Samuel, Kathryn, Evelyn, Suzanne, Sonja, Jonathan, Charlotte Claire, and Camille. I told them we could go to lunch somewhere....we stopped at DunkinDonuts and got one dozen donuts, a medium coffee with lots of cream, no sugar, and one ice water....yeah, they shared that. I had the coffee.

Then we went to the store that I should be banned from, as I spend way too much money there. I should take my blood pressure at the register....anyway, they had beach towels 50% off...and even thought I am more of a 75% off person, I bought 7 towels. They ranged from $2.99 to $4.99, and they are very nice. I passed them out last night, and what was I thinking? I need a few more....and I got the girls some new sandals for 75% off....they usually start school in sandals, it is still hot out. Anyway, I got a few school supplies, a few pair of shorts for the boys for 1/2 off....and, nothing for me.

Then we went to the grocery store. 8 kids in the grocery store.....oh, where do I even start? There were no car carts. But Jon didn't have a breakdown, he has come a long way. I put Camille in a cart, and the rest walked. Camille is a tricky one. She will not let me buckle her, she says, "I buckle, I buckle!" Or should I say she screams it. So, I take my hands away and let her buckle. But the thing is, she never buckles. She stands up when she feels like it, so I have to be on guard. I try to buckle her again, and she does the same, "I buckle, I buckle" thing. right. whatever. Charlotte Claire got bored and tired by the middle of the store. She would lay right on the floor to rest. Suze wanted to push the cart, and everytime I stopped to look at something, she would weedle her way in between the cart and I.....but I need that cart to hold me up!!! Then one of them remembered the balloons, and off they all went over to the floral department. Unfortunately, the usual nice lady wasn't there, and the girl said, "You have to be seven or under to get a balloon!" Poor Suzanne came back crying. So I bought her Silly Putty. And I wonder why they are such brats....but they are sweet and nice brats. Not exactly princesses, but close. Anyway, it was after 4 when we checked out....so we headed home without going out to lunch....but they had had the donut and a cookie in the store...and we had all the stuff for taco salad...believe me, they ate dinner well!

Oh, we went in the hot tub last night....I made a deal with Paul...I would take them all out there, he could have some peace and quiet, but he had to come out and get Camille after 15 minutes and put her to bed. I got her bottle made and her jammies ready. It was more like a half-hour, but he came through. It relaxed her and tired her out to be in that warm water for a while. There is nothing like being out there on a night like last night. It was breezy, and the sound of the wind in the poplar trees reminds me of being little, because we had those trees at our camp near Lake Ontario......and it was my mother's favorite sound. So when we got in from the hot tub, I told the kids if they got ready for bed really fast, I would tell them stories....I told them about when we were little, we had this camp with no telephone or tv....it was quiet, you could hear the waves from the lake....we played cards and wrote on the kitchen table with a pencil and washed it off and wrote on it again....my mother was never bored, she could make everything fun. Us kids were up there with her alone alot when my father worked, she had no car and no license, we had no phone...it was wonderful....and relaxing. I believe those were the best years of her life. The camp was nothing fancy, just a mobile home in a nice grassy yard down a stony road from the beach. The beach was private, owned by the camp owners...and there were usually hardly any people up there, so it was our own beach. Sandy and wonderful. I remember sneaking down there for a ciggarette when I was a teenager, yes I was bad, and my mother coming down there and finding me, and just having one too...the moon shining on the water....the peacefullness, my feet in the cold sand. (My mother quit smoking a few years later, I also did....if any of my kids are reading this, I am just kidding! I never smoked!)

Well, the kids are up and about and I need to be too....as far as my previous post goes, I think the least said soonest mended, as Laura Ingalls Wilder's ma ,Caroline ,used to say. So that is all there is to it.. I can't give him the satisfaction of more than that. And here is my comfort, Psalm 25..

To You, O Lord, I lift my soul.
2. O my God, I trust in You, Let me not be ashamed;Let not my enemies triumph over me.
3. Indeed, let no one who waits on You be ashamed; Let those be ashamed who deal treacherously without cause.
4. Show me Your ways, O Lord; Teach me Your paths.
5. Lead me in Your truth and teach me, For You are the God of my salvation: On You I wait all the day.
6. Remember, O Lord, Your tender mercies and Your lovingkindnesses. For they are from of old.
7. Do not remember the sins of my youth, nor my transgressions; According to Your mercy remember me, For your goodness' sake, O Lord.
8. Good and upright is the Lord; Therefore He teaches sinners in the way.
9. The humble He guides in justice, And the humble He teaches His way.
10. All the paths of the Lord are mercy and truth, To such as keep His covenant and His testimonies.
11. For Your name's sake, O Lord, Pardon my iniguity, for it is great.
12. Who is the man that fears the Lord? Him shall He teach in the way He chooses.
13. He himself shall dwell in prosperity, And his descendants shall inherit the earth.
14. The secret of the Lord is with those who fear Him, And He will show them His covenant.
15. My eyes are ever toward the Lord, For He shall pluck my feet out of the net.
16. Turn Yourself to me, and have mercy on me, For I am desolate and afflicted.
17. The troubles of my heart have enlarged; Bring me out of my distresses!
18. Look on my affliction and my pain, and forgive all my sins.
19. Consider my enemies , for they are many, And they hate me with a cruel hatred.
20. Keep my soul, and deliver me; Let me not be ashamed, for I put my trust in You.
21. Let integrity and uprightness preserve me. For I wait for you.
22. Redeem Israel, O God. Out of all their troubles!



aah. That refreshes the soul....and keeps me in need....my enemies are within me....and they shall not get victory. God will be with me, and help me overcome. After all this IS the day that the Lord has made.....

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

damage control?

There is a person out there who is causing a tempest in a teacup...I have now modified the comments on here....it has always been a bit challenging for me to be at rest posting things on the web...and now there is someone making up some crazy things...so....he is upset so he went through all the trouble of setting someone up....it almost looked real. So....anyway....pray for me, that I can find peace on here again, and that he can calm down and find God. And pray for my family, that no lasting harm was done.....


I don't feel much like writing tonight.....

off we go again....

Charlotte Claire with long dark hair?
Yah, I'm organized....I have a special place for huge boxes of cereal, even. The corner. But I am not too concerned...it will be gone before we know it.... We are going out the door with our pool floaties, window cleaner and the vacuum cleaner....to our camper, which is at the church conference center.....it needs to be cleaned up a bit, the summer conference is coming up! Afterwards, we will have some lunch and take a quick swim....so we are packing bread, peanutbutter, jam, cups, juice, cheezies.....the other day when we went to the pool, I forgot my suit...what will we forget this time?

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

2 of my boys are home...

I know they didn't REALLY grow a few inches in three weeks, but it seemed like it...we had to wait a while for their luggage, and didn't get home until 1:00am, which seemed like 7 am to them...they were like zombies, but excited happy zombies...


So today I had a few places to go. My sis-in-law told me that BJ's had cereal, triple boxes of LuckyCharms/CocoaPuffs/Trix for $2.50 after the coupons, which were in the store. I got 5 boxes. We got a few other things, then I took the kids to lunch at the Chinese buffet...I had a card that had enough stamps for one free lunch....so it wasn't too bad. It was nice to have Aaron and Samuel along. They had alot to tell us about.

We then stopped at Blockbuster and got 9 movies for 5 dollars....with the Rewards card, the shelf titles are rent one get one free on Mon. through Wed. and I had rented so many of those, I got a free rental...so I got a new release for free....Coroline...it was kind of scary for the little ones, so they went off and played...but I liked it. We got 3D glasses for it. Some of us want to watch it again.....

So tonight I made some homemade scalloped potatoes, broccoli, and hot dogs and hamburgers. No spills tonight, but when Aaron was shaking up the hot sauce, he shook too hard and hit the edge of his Corelle plate, it shattered...his dinner was full of shards....as was Jon's....what a mess....I hope we didn't miss any pieces.

I was loading up the dishwasher and washing up the pans, Samuel was sweeping, the girls were clearing the table and bringing me the dishes, and Aaron was reading stories. Camille had pooped. Aaron changed her, no problem. Wow, is it nice to have these boys home or what? Oh, not that they are cleaning machines or anything, but they certainly pitch in.

Jonathan picked out a Curious George dvd today, it has some episodes of the tv show on it. It is a cute show, I really think they did a good job bringing George to the screen. He is cute and curious without being too irritatingly troublesome.

Charlotte Claire ran out of steam early tonight, she never naps any more, and gets tired...Camille is still going strong....Jon and Sonja K. are going to bed right after this episode....Kathryn turned the hot tub up to 102 today, so I am looking forward to getting sweetie-pie Monkey Jam-Jam in bed tonight...

Well, Miss M. Jam-Jams pooped AGAIN, and if I don't drop everything and change her, she will change herself....

Monday, July 20, 2009

rosie and monkey jam-jams

Rosie..... some of the candy in Abigail's room...if we can make until the conference without any little hands ripping any little wrappers.....it will be a miracle...

Here is Monkey Jam-Jams...with Suzanne



Monkey Jam-Jams with Evelyn and I....
Now, off to the airport....



fun in the sun....

This fine photo was taken by Sonja K....she brought my camera on our outing, and took 73 pictures....
Here is Evelyn Joy...her Pushpop looks very safe...oh, the things that go on that I don't realize...


Charlotte Claire....

Sonja K....oh, too bad her Gramma isn't around to see the red hair and freckles...


Today, we went to a strange little store that I really like....we got sprinkles and sprinkles....piggies, cows, hearts, dolphins, teddy bears....and we got candy....big slabs of Hershey chocolate for $2.39....and a big bag of the marshmallows like the ones that come in Lucky Charms....which they are eating now....yum.
Then we stopped at a cool little playground that we never stopped at before....Margaret, Kathryn, Evelyn, Suzanne, Sonja, Jonathan, Charlotte Claire, and Camille....a little girl asked me if they were all in the same family, if they were all my kids....I told her they were one half of my kids....she asked how many we had all together, and when I told her, she ran over and told her babysitters......who asked me many questions...and suggested that we have a few more so we "beat the Duggars"....okay. Just comparing us to the Duggars made me laugh. I left the house with a load of towels in the wash that just wouldn't spin, our washer is very old and fussy. If I were Michelle Duggar, I would have put a load into each of my FOUR beautiful washers....no, I am not too jealous! I am glad for her. She seems very kind, and I bet her and I would get along just fine.....
Tonight for dinner we had leftover chicken breast that I grilled yesterday....I sliced it up, and put most of it in a glass baking dish with barbecue sauce....then some in another baking dish with hot sauce and butter, stirred it all up to coat it, and baked it in the oven for about 15 minutes while the baked beans with bacon were heating....then we had green beans, and leftover Italian bread turned into garlic bread....oh, and the kids had some pasta....Camille did not like the baked beans. She made a big production of spitting them back out onto her plate. Nice.
I gave Rosie a nice bath after dinner, because the boys are coming home tonight, and I wanted her to be all clean and fluffy....I brushed her out after the bath, which is getting harder...her fur is thick and tangly. And mixed with those little green things from going into the tall grass and woods.....she is a messy slobby dog. But she sticks around pretty well, so I don't tie her up unless we leave.
The boys' flight arrives at the airport at 11:30 tonight. Yay! I wish I had taken a nice long nap this afternoon instead of galavanting all over the place.....but, I didn't. Margaret and Kathryn are 12 and 11, they will make good companions for the ride down there...Sam called me from a payphone in Dulles airport in D.C. to tell me their flight would be later....when I saw the caller I.D. listed as "payphone", my heart dropped....WHAT happened to WHO? I always think the worst first. When I answered, and Sam said, "Mom?" I was like..."What's wrong??!!".....oh yeah, I am calm. Calm cool and collected.
So I think I will have myself a nice hot cup of instant coffee, Nescafe. The only instant coffee worth drinking, and they did NOT pay me to say that....Margaret is making me a cup...


oops, I didn't post yesterday....

No, actually I did write...but it just seemed so mundane...so I didn't post it.

What can I say? It was a Sunday at home. There was no meeting. Paul mowed the lawn, I picked up the yard, and sat with the kids while they played in the sand, to make sure Rosie was nice to them. We went in the hot tub, we had sno cones, we cooked alot of chicken on the grill and froze some.....

So now it is Monday again. My day started out with the saddest thought....I was dreaming about sending Jonathan to kindergarten, which is sad enough, but in my dream, he was going to be going to school from my mother's house, so he could go to the elementary school I went to. I figured, in my dream, that I was always at my mom's house anyway, so it would make more sense if she put him on the bus for me, and I picked him up at her house....(in the dream it made perfect sense).....so, being a dream and all, and seeming really realistic, I was shocked when I woke up (Paul makes too much noise when he gets ready for work) and realized that my mom is gone, the house is gone, all gone. It was almost as if I had heard it for the first time, ouch. Rats.

Yes, Jonathan is going to kindergarten. It makes me so sad. I know he will like it, he is a very social child. But he is also such a trusting soul, I cannot bear to think of kids being mean to him. To me, he is adorable, but will kids laugh at his ears? At the way he walks on his toes? Will he suck his thumb there, and get teased? Besides all that, I don't want to give him up yet. He is the light of my day. He is so funny and sincere and the way he is figuring the world out is SO amusing. He is my 14th kindergartener, and it hasn't gotten any easier....in fact, it has gotten harder....those years home with me go by so quickly....and yet, I just don't know about homeschooling. I want to do it, but the requirements here in New York state are daunting. If I could just teach them on my terms, I would do it in a minute.

So I am taking the kids "bye-bye" today. We have a stack of movies to go back to Blockbuster, and it is a nice day,....I don't know what we will do yet....we are going to clean up the house quick, (ha, quick)....then decide where to go...beach? playground? hmm.......

Saturday, July 18, 2009

pool liners, play ground, and sno cones

So this time I got the liner size right, 28 foot across....Paul and Jon went to the Sand and Stone store and got sand...(they weighed the truck, then the truck WITH the sand in it..) Paul shoveled it over the side of the wall, and raked it out...then time to spread out the liner. Ideally, a group of people would then get the liner into place...but it was just he and I. While we were pulling it up and putting the edge pieces on, we could hear Suzanne and Sonja in the house with Jon and Charlotte Claire and Camille....then crying....Benjamin went in and put Camille in for her nap....then he had to leave for work....so, we, ("we" being mostly Paul)....installed the liner.... It never did drape evenly...we ended up with a bunch of extra liner...but just clipped it on anyway. The fun part were the wasps. We had wasp spray out there with us, they had nice little homes in the metal posts. Then Paul yelled and jumped a foot: there were three snakes under a piece he picked up....he hates snakes...I do not know how he continuted putting the metal toppers back on after that.....I was too busy taking the little kids in the hot tub to help finish up...anyway, we put a little water in it so far, and still have to hook up the pump system...


Camille....

Jonathan Robert....with MY ice water...



Charlotte Claire thought she was beautiful in Sonja's bathing suit, and I wasn't going to tell her any different. And the sneakers, they will fit her in kindergarten...





What a happy little child, a bag of chips and an orange crayon....wonder if she had any specific plans...




Joseph, this is for you: Ms. Kitten Force....






Playground! Kathryn with Camille...







Me with Camille (I felt bad putting those pictures up the other day...this is what I REALLY look like...)(I DO look like I have had 16 kids...)









Charlotte Claire and I....







This is what it would be like to have seven kids...Kathryn in the back, Evelyn with Camille, then Sonja, Jonathan, Charlotte Claire, and Suzanne in the yellow.




































The playground is at our church...we brought home the SNO Cone machine (it is ours), to try out a new flavor, cotton candy. I loved it. Suzanne prefers plain ice. The rest of the kids were with me....We run this during the summer conference....it is fun...and I really like them....

So, they had a few sno cones tonight, then stories, then bed...they JUST went to bed. Way too late, but hey, it is summer. Margaret is not here, so there are just the seven youngest. It is quiet with just Paul and I, and I miss the clatter and chatter of the older ones, but they stay up even later than we do, so this break has been nice. Paul and I have had some extra time to talk. I say, as I sit here with my computer and he sits there with his!
I need to let Ms. Crazy Pup back in the house...she needs some attention before she goes in the cage for the night.



























Friday, July 17, 2009

cookies...

Why do kids eat the middles out of their cookies? Why do boys like trucks? These things were not invented yet when people were created, but these things seem to be instinctive....

Yas, I went a-shoppin' today. Mirielle, we went to Target without you again, my dear! Can France be better than Target? Wow, alot of shoes were 75% off. And a dress I couldn't decide on when it was half-off was 75%off today. Just for the record, the kids were not angels. They were bored looking at the clothes, and dropped 10 or 12 bikini bottoms onto the floor....they had the sillies...I had to put my foot down and make them hold onto the cart. Then Charlotte Claire almost had a meltdown when I picked out a cute little dress for her cousin's birthday, and I didn't get one for her, too. Sorry, sweetie. I know it's cute, but NO. Ouchie...she really wanted the dress....and I was hoping she would be okay, because 15th child or not, what in the heck do you do with a crying 3 year old in the middle of Target? I have never quite figured that out. I can't just leave, like some of the magazines say...I drove way too far for that. And I certainly can't just get them whatever they want to avoid little fits....they would be more spoiled than they already are......then to the toys...I warned them on the way over there that we were NOT getting any today...so they were fine....Charlotte Claire DID ask for a dozen or so things, though....I picked her up a 30 cent box of crayons, and Jonathan some 50 cent colored pencils....yeah, they are a little spoiled....then we went to the grocery store.

When we got home with all the stuff, Margaret took off to her room to try on her new stuff, she found 4 or 5 things on the clearance rack. She was also packing to go to her friend's house tonight, they are going to a water park tomorrow. I put away the groceries, got Camille and Charlotte Claire down for naps, (C.C. only lies down long enough to drink her sippy cup of milk, and gets back up)(and today she decided to poop in the naptime pullup, yay!)....and barely sat down, when Paul came in early...he had things to do this afternoon, and got home by 4:30....we decided since we only had the three younger kids here for dinner to just have grilled cheese and fresh blueberries. And Pringles crunchy chips, the kind in the bag...way too good.

Suzanne and Sonja came back from their overnight stay, after Margaret left for hers. They are exhausted.....Camille is now the only kid up. It is so wierd to have such a quiet Friday night. Usually the older kids would be clattering back in the door from youth sports, ravaging the kitchen and making a general racket. A nice happy racket, that I do miss.

So, the question is, did everything go the way I wanted it to go today? Is that the usual measurement of a "good" day? If so, it was not a good day. My 12 year old can be moody. I don't want to embarrass her, she is such a good girl, but not always easy for me to get along with...but that is my fault, too. I find that I expect certain answers, a certain attitude, and when I don't get it, boy, I don't like it....I DO have to deal with it, can't let her be disrespectful, but I also have to deal with how it affects ME. I cannot just be snotty back. No, I really have to be awake to how I react. Anyway, we took our 40-something minute trip to the store with her back in the third row seat....I was pretty surprised....and I felt really bad. No co-pilot?! We had not been arguing, or anything, she was just mechanically doing what I asked her, and rebelling against going to the store in her own special way, even though she said she was okay with going...make sense? Anyway, I kept my mouth shut about how bad I felt that she was choosing to ride back there....and by the time we shopped together (and I bought her stuff!), she was okey-dokey again...she rode home in the front seat and we chatted all the way home. hmm. Then she disapeared and left me with the groceries and the kids...hmm. Oh well.

Camille is the only kid up, and she has a wipe. She is washing her dollhouse. She has only a diaper on, and not because that is all her lazy mother put on her. No, she likes to undress. I have to be like a hawk, a hawk with a good sense of smell, because if I don't know when she poops, she will try to change herself. She wants to use the toilet, and I am not ready for that yet. No, having the three-year old trash the bathroom is fun enough. Oh, the water on the counter, the tons of toilet paper used, the toothpaste she has squeezed out....adding Camille to that does NOT sound fun.

I have three half-gallons of icecream in the freezer. $2 each at Price-Chopper, with a coupon for $1 off three. So, three for $5....$1.67 each. And we have cones. I will not have any tonight, I will not. I will only have some when I serve it to the kids, and I will just have a little.

Hey, I just remembered something...my boys are coming home in a few days, and they might bring me some Norwegian chocolate! Woo-hoo! Now if I could just get them to bring me a pram, too.....

I do believe that babies come from heaven. And that God sends the children...but I still have Baby Withdrawl Syndrome. It is a new syndrome, one that I just this minute made up. It consists of an intense longing for a newborn. It is usually found in women who have had baby after baby for so many years, that the end of this pattern seems empty and sad. Women with this syndrome don't necessarily long for another pregnancy, especially if they are getting on in years, but they dream about someone just handing them a baby. They see young unwed mothers propping bottles for babies in infant carseats, and are tempted to ask if they can just have the baby. (no offense intended, these moms truly love their babies, too, this syndrome just produces this baby greed that is unexplainable).....this syndrome must have an end, maybe menopause? It hasn't been diagnosed in enough women for this to be determined. If you, or anyone you know, may have these symptoms, please let me know..I think Cassie-Ann has it, and my sister Cheryl too. When women with this syndrome hear other mothers say, "I had BLANK # of kids, and I am DONE"....they do not understand for the life of them how a person can say that....DONE? (I am kind of kidding...I know there are many medical reasons, many personal reasons, it is a highly personal area altogether....I am just writing how I have it.....) And I am really at rest about it, I just would LIKE another baby. Newborns are just so delicious. Meeting, rocking, nursing, cuddling, smelling, kissing a new baby...oh, just heavenly...and then they only get better....better and better ....even Miss Camille, who is still up, taking her diaper off again while she eats a peanut butter sandwich cookie (well, just the middle. She is putting the sides back in the bag and getting a new cookie with cream still in it....I am pretending not to notice....otherwise I will have to do something about it...just don't have any Famous Amos peanut butter cookies at my house...).. I probably should take action soon, she has now taken her diaper off, and has dropped all the cookies on the floor. A naked toddler putting the cookies back in the baggy.....she needs to go to bed now....sweetie that she is...

my true heart's desire

Okay, I hate dusty old religion. Rules and regulations. Meaningless restrictions...but....I have found that salvation is not like that. It is living and true and real and free...

My heart's whole desire is to be a true disciple of Jesus. He was tempted, but never sinned. He overcame. And here I am with my body of sin......so full of pride and impatience and wanting to be right...selfishness, discontentment....but" faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not yet seen .".(Hebrews 11 v. 1)

So during the day....when I want something, then I have a chance to follow Jesus. I have an opportunity to give up my own will. A chance to be an overcomer. Or, I can give in and be selfish. No one will probably know. But following Jesus is a hidden thing. I have to have that connection with Him, to hear His voice...and when I listen to that voice, and am obedient, then I get victory over my sin.

So I am sometimes very frustrated, and impatient, and tempted to be angry and all of that....that is the time to cry for help, and endure to the end. I can therefore suffer it out, and not sin. Then the kids don't have to suffer because of my sin. My husband doesn't have to feel the sting of my witchiness.

Sometimes I see moms so exasperated with their kids. And I feel like crying (who am I kidding, I usually do)....because I feel sorry for the mom AND the kids, AND I know exactly how it is because that is the way it is for me...but I gave the gospel! And I want to shout it on the rooftops that people don't have to live this way, in anxiety and anger! Jesus made a way through the flesh! He made a way for us to follow! It isn't some lofty far-away long ago happening....He speaks to ME, and helps ME.....and part of the reason I write this is I have such a longing that others can come to this rest and happiness that only comes from following Him. This peace and happiness have nothing to do with competency (GOOD THING!), or being organized, or being naturally optimistic....God can melt the hardest heart, make the stingiest a giver, and help me be a servant....

So, Paul and I got converted many years ago...and there has been such a blessing over our family. Not because of us! Paul and I each want to be faithful, and pursue peace. Therefore, to be "right" is not important, although we both find we are tempted to it....when two marriage partners are humbling themselves and seeking to please God, how can it not go well? In Philippians 2, v. 3 "Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself..." this is actually quite easy to do when we can see ourselves the way we really are, courtesy of the light God gives us...

Well, I am done trying to condense the whole gospel into one little post...

But sometimes it just grieve my heart when I see suffering. Not suffering because of poverty or hunger, but suffering because of anger and sin. Children living under the wrath of parents....blaming, fear, suspiscion...all this garbage being allowed to live and thrive....and people wonder why their kids are disobedient and rebellious.

Okay, I am really done now. I am not so good at this anyway. Sometimes in my dreams, I can say these things so beautifully that people are just apprehended....

The best place to read some really good stuff is at http://brunstad.org/

Today is an open slate....stretched before me all hopefully. Margaret and I are going to go shopping with Jonathan, Charlotte Claire, and Camille. Sounds simple. Maybe it will be. It all depends on how I take it of course. But you never know, Charlotte C. might NOT unbuckle when we are driving 60mph, Camille MIGHT smile and be happy when I buckle her up, and she MIGHT want to stay sitting in the cart, and Jon MIGHT not have a breakdown for a toy by the end of the trip, Charlotte C. MIGHT not touch everything and run in front of the cart and fall on the floor in frustration....Jon and Charlotte C. MIGHT not reach a silly, unreasonable point where their ears are not working, but their laughter is....and my knees MIGHT not hurt....MAYBE I'll remember all of my coupons, remember everything (like my list!).......see, all of this is highly unlikely...so.....I need salvation today!

Thursday, July 16, 2009

pictures

Okay, Mirielle, we had makeovers today....this is me with eye stuff on, yuck. Evelyn and Kathryn left to go to a birthday party, so Suzanne, Sonja, and I did our nails, and then a bit of make-up...I never wear it, and it felt strange...
Joseph, here are some pictures of the kids for you....Sonja and Suzanne, and Charlotte Claire....we had fun with water balloons.


Camille begged and fussed for the water balloons, and every one we gave her, she immediately bit, and it would burst water all over her...





Rosie has somehow aquired the bottle-cleaning brush...I don't want it back.


Here she is with the package of water balloons....she takes things and runs...







Suze, Charlotte C., Sonja K., and Jonathan...





Puppy likes mud. She just had a bath yesterday.








It is very warm today, but pleasant....








Rosie...she brought her dish into the living room, and flopped down and dug in. Her paws are so big and fluffy and unreal. She is going to be a big doggy.








When you look at this picture, do you think the same thing I think? Which is, AAAHHH, what if he throws-up? No child's bed should have this many stuffed animals, it is just asking for the barfies....










This is me on the computer....for Joseph and Aaron and Sam, just in case they forget what I look like....Kathryn was doing the little girls' hair....

Well, Charlotte Claire is throwing a huge fit because she wanted to go in Camille's room first, and Jonathan and Sonja are having what they call a "sissy" fight on the couch...lying feet to feet and kicking...and, it is almost 6 and I have to start dinner...burgers on the grill....Suzanne got Camille up and is changing her diaper...what a nice girl. Suzanne and Sonja are going on an adventure: they are spending the night at Tonje's apartment with Abigail and Tonje and their friend Anna. They are all packed and ready and excited....and I am running out of kids here....Kathryn and Evelyn are gone for the night, so I will just have Benjamin, Margaret, Jonathan, Charlotte Claire, and Camille. Then tomorrow, when the other girls come home, Margaret is going to a friend's house....wow....it will seem crazy when they are all home again...but it will be good. I do miss them. All of you older kids of mine who read this: I am NOT glad you are gone....if it sounds like that, it is just me making the best of things. I miss the laughing and craziness in the evenings, heck until midnight most nights.
So, dinner time.....