How to decide? 100% of me says YES!!! But then the other 100% of me wonders how on earth will this family function without me.
I watch young children during the week. Can Kathryn manage to do it for me? Is it right to ask her to? The kids have schooling to do, will they do it? Then there's the soccer tournament at church...Sonja and Jonathan are playing, and are so into it...I want to watch them play, I want to be a part of this with them. There are also so many other things going on next weekend...
Here's the thing: I felt so bad later after writing that Paul doesn't care about the little details in my life. Because that implies that he doesn't care about me, and that's not true. He's just more of a get-to-the-point-of-the-story person. And I am a storyteller. Yet we still really like each other. We've managed to stay on the same page through many trials, choosing to be together in whatever challenges come our way. When one particular older son got himself in trouble a few years back, Paul looked at me, and asked, "What do we do?" We've been through so much together. And we are very blessed to still have that attraction to each other. So when I write here, I write about how I feel about things, yet I don't want to put him in a bad light for the whole world to read, and think he's not an excellent husband...:)
So. He texted this morning, it's not a sure thing yet, he's been looking into getting me a plane ticket...for next week. I pulled of a trip to Washington D.C. last week, with about 12 hours notice until departure time, but I took my younger kids with me. This is a little different. I have some thinking to do.
My heart says to just go. When will I ever get an opportunity like this again? We get so very little time together without kids around, and we are getting older, and and and. I also want to get a little peek into his world...
Then come all the practicalities...I'm pretty sure I can convince the older kids to cover for me, but is it fair?
The answer to this question will come this evening, when he calls me from Paris. He's coming home tomorrow, but only for a week. Will I be getting on the plane with him the next time, or will I be dropping him off at the airport and driving to the soccer tournament?...hmm.