what will today bring?

Sonja K. is sick with a fever, she has the flu. The nice nurse from school called yesterday to say that that Suzanne was there in her office and needed to be picked up. Then Jonathan came home from the Activity Club ice skating party last night shivering...102 temperature. So, did I send the two little princesses? No. I tip-toed into their room with the thermometer this morning and checked Miss Char. 97.4. Camille was still sound asleep. Char begged to be able to go back to sleep. She said her throat hurts and she is tired. Well, with all that is going around...I said Okay, as long as she was quiet and didn't wake Camille, and truly went back to sleep. They are finally waking up now.

So Evelyn is here. She went back to school yesterday and feels worn out today. Suze, Sonja, Jon are sick. And the princesses are up and playing Barbies. I guess this means I cancel Evelyn's dentist appointment, since I can't leave the younger ones all here by themselves.

I do have to go to BigLot's sometime today. I went there yesterday and spent $99 on things we really needed, like a new zippered vinyl mattress cover to replace a ripped one, stocking stuffers, a SpongeBob Christmas dvd, and some 50 cent bags of kettle chips. The bag with the quilted waterproof mattress cover and the shower curtains stayed behind at the store. I called and they are holding it for me. It never made it into the cart somehow. oh well. (I know, right? 99 dollars??!!)

I didn't even get new undies for the little girls. They need some because a certain puppy likes to chew them up. lovely.

Christmas is coming,
The goose is getting fat,
Please put a penny in the old man's hat,
If you haven't got a penny a ha'penny will do,
If you haven't got a half-penny, God bless YOU!

I do not know who wrote that. But it puts things into perspective, doesn't it?

I have most of our presents wrapped now, some for the third time. Suzanne pitched in and helped me last night while most of the other kids were ice skating. I still have like five kids to buy for though.

All my own mother ever wanted for Christmas was, "seven good kids."...and we would tell her she already had that. She would say that she was all set then. I miss her. Christmas is a tough time for that. I miss my dad too. He wasn't perfect, but he cared about us. The way he looked out for us all felt so secure. He has been gone for almost 6 years now and I still feel rather untethered. A little lost. My parents loved me like no one on this earth ever could. Then there is my brother Billy. I can't even think about him without crying still.

Yes, Christmastime is a season for memories and traditions, and some of those memories make me feel such loss.

Kathryn has been texting me from school. She doesn't have a phone, but she has one of her siblings' old ipod with a texting app. She is heading to the nurse because she feels awful. Dang, I need to wash my long tangly hair. Wonder if I have time to jump into the shower...