Okay...random things from a scatterbrained mom.
I just talked to Emily, she said she bought me roses for Mother's Day and forgot to bring them over. Well, she said, she bought them the day AFTER Mother's Day. And they were two dollars a dozen. I don't care that she forgot to bring them over, and I don't care that she only paid two dollars. I am happy that she thought about me, and that she knew I would appreciate them all the more because...they were two dollars.
Abigail...I spent time with her yesterday, we worked at the ball game together. She has this hilarious laugh, and such a good attitude about life.
Anyway, the things that are swirling around in my brain...I have to do some shopping for our church soccer tournament for this weekend. Lots of shopping, several hundred cans of drinks, burgers and chicken and and and. I already bought most of the candy for the candy store. I also have to work on Thursday night at the baseball game. Paul signed up to work on Saturday and Sunday, which means he won't get to see Evelyn, Suzanne, Sonja, and Jonathan play soccer. I probably won't get to see too much either, since I will be working at the candy store. It's really interesting to do this church fundraising. It is a sacrifice for everyone who does it, but it seems like it's always the same people who work. The ones who don't work probably have really good reasons, but they don't realize that those who do have the same reasons but just work anyway. So I need to just work on my own salvation, and be happy doing what I know is right without getting critical of those who are happy not helping.:)
We are thinking of homeschooling our little girls in the next few years. Our school district is amazing, the teachers are very nice...but our little girls are growing up so fast, childhood is so fleeting. They are there in school all day, get home at 4:00, then have homework...so much repetition, too. Camille catches on to things rather quickly, and loves to learn. They still like the social aspect of school, but are asking to homeschool. I think they could probably get enough school work done at home in just a few hours a day, then have plenty more time to run and play and use their imaginations.
We get to choose. Things happen to us, but our thoughts are our own, and our thoughts are like the rudder that guides how our lives will go. A little thought of bitterness will cause those bitter roots to grow, so sneakily they grow. They can seem so RIGHT, those thoughts. But we have the choice to cling to that which is good, to say no to those thoughts. I keep thinking of a verse in Deuteronomy, it says, "Choose life!" (30:19 "I call heaven and earth as witness today against you, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and cursing, therefore choose life that you and your descendants may live; 20 "that you may love the Lord your God, that you may obey His voice, and that you may cling to Him, for He is your life and the length of your days; and that you may dwell in the land which the Lord swore to your fathers, to Abraham, Issac, and Jacob, to give to them.")
I can think of ways I have been slighted, or of something Paul has said to me, or they way someone assumes I will take care of something...and the thoughts start to churn. It doesn't matter if I look like a nice person, or if I can keep my house clean, or make it to ever church function. What matters is that I keep my heart pure. I am going to stand before Him one day, and nothing will be hidden then. Just think to take care of all that sin, day in day out, to live in such a way that that day isn't a fearful thing.
It seems like among Christians, there is so much emphasis on whether one thing or another is right or wrong, but mention being free from sin, and oh dear, not THAT. The outward things will fall into place when the inner life is put right.
Anyway. Enough preaching. I am mostly preaching to myself, you wouldn't believe how much help I get from writing things like that.
Mali just texted me and asked me if I am home. Oh joy, I am my mother's daughter, they way I get so happy just knowing one of my older kids is coming for a visit! She said she misses me, how can anything be better than that? My mother used to say that if anyone asked her if she had a favorite child or grandchild, she would answer, "Yes, the one I'm with!" I feel like that with my kids, too. I love them all, and think about them all the time when they're not with me, I pray for them, wish them the best....
This is why I am glad I don't have a Real Job. Mali is coming over:)!
Now, don't go thinking I don't have any trials. I do. I just have to be careful what I write here, I don't want the kids to hate me. Sam still bugs me about something I wrote years ago about his pants falling down and him needing a new belt, apparently I bought him a belt at the dollar store and blogged about it. He can do this hilarious Mom voice and narrate it, it makes everyone laugh, and I cringe.
I just have to tell my story and be careful of their privacy, that's all.
Anyway, Mali's coming over! I knew this was going to be a good day.
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4 comments:
Homeschooling has brought such joy to my life. You can't get the young years back I don't regret not sending them to school :) such repetition in school learning how to stand in lines .... At home imagination and our own schedule was such a blessing:)it also helps there's a huge homeschool community in Orlando!
:) orlando, Florida
I sure understand you're thinking about homeschooling - I know for a fact that I would homeschool if we were to move back to the states. Here in Finland the kids do have shorter days, and actually not much homework (yet Finnish schools tend to score high on the international testing they do at ... age 15 or whatever.) I would actually even consider homeschooling here, but - I can't teach our kids the Finnish language, and since we live here they really do need to know the language. I sometimes anyway wish I was homeschooling - at least the younger ones.
I tend to be like you though, I think. Often a headache or stomach ache in the late evening or morning might actually mean something stressful is going on in school, or they just need a day with Mom; sometimes I go with that, and they stay home. But same as your kids, ours do well in school - so I figure it's not harming them!
Wonderful message-thank you for sharing it!
I loved and can relate so much to what you wrote today! The fundraising - we are a large family with many littles still, and have already exceeded the fundraising points for this month as a couple (don't know if you guys do this?) and yet still, there are more empty shifts available calllllling to us! Lol - so good to find our way, to find the things hidden in our flesh that need rooted out and brought to light!
I have thought as well, about homeschooling several of mine. Not all, love that we can choose this option! I very much enjoy your love of the children...I struggle often with feeling sheer exhaustion and then guilt because I just need some alone time. I want so much to have more joy in the children God has given me, and delight in them!
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