my camille anaya

Ooh, is she ever a mama's baby....and she isn't even really a baby anymore....she is so huggy (does that sound better than clingy?)....I put her to bed, sat down and put my feet up (after sneaking a few white chocolate macedamia nut cookies WITHOUT sharing, the key word being SNEAKING), and started to write....well, Camille did not want to stay in her nice green bed. So she cried. So we got her up. We are very smart. "Start as you mean to go on"....so I guess we are forming bad habits....but it is very very hot here in New York state. Muggy and still eighty here in the living room, no air conditioning. I cannot let a child cry in this heat, who am I kidding....it isn't the heat....I will put her back in later...she is joining Mirielle, Mali, Margaret, Kathryn, Evelyn, and Suzanne at the table....they are coloring. I always loved the 64ct. box of Crayolas, and apparently they do too. They are also having ice cream and homemade iced tea. Aaron and Sam are camping in the Adirondacks this weekend with a few boys from church. I sent them off with the 52 ounce bag of Starburst, and some warnings to use their life jackets when in the canoes....and that's about it.

I went in the pool three times today. It is so hot out, I had to go underwater to feel refreshed. I don't mind going swimming with 6 or 8 or 10 kids, it is the two youngest that wear me out. They have special suits that keep them afloat, and they have learned to keep their heads up so the suits work effectively. But they have no fear! Camille stands on the ladder, announces, "I jumps!", and she jumps! She goes right under, and comes up smiling! I, of course, am not calm cool and collected about this. And Charlotte Claire is the same way. She likes me to throw her. Over and over again. She comes bobbing up to the surface, and if the water is wavy, due to all the kids in there bouncing around, she sometimes gets a faceful....and I grab her, and she just wants me to put her down, she is fine. I am not complaining about the pool, no I am very thankful for it....for the kids getting the excercise, keeping busy, and being able to cool down. And I do have some help, but the way Camille is, I cannot trust anyone else, really. Charlotte Claire, too. There are times when I just feel tired of being in there watching like a hawk, but if I get out, the little ones have to get out too....anyway, I am not complaining...but not too much else is getting done around here.....but it's summer, we can live with it.

Tonight we had some pasta salad, courtesy of Mirielle....bow tie pasta with green peppers, sweet onions, tomatoes, cucumbers, black olives, with red pepper and garlic dressing. And hot dogs and coneys cooked on the grill, and sliced cucumbers. I do love summer.

I brushed out the little girls' hair today....tangles and snarls. We vow that we will not let it get so tangly again. Right.

I feel so sorry for Kate G. , ...the one with the eight children.....her husband cheated on her, moved out....I do not know the whole story, but...apparently he hired a babysitter she did not approve of while he had visitation, so she tried to enter the property, which is forbidden under their visitation agreement. The police had to come because they argued. No matter what happened to their marriage, I just feel plain sorry for Kate. Imagine if your children were being babysat by someone you didn't approve of, and you couldn't do a stinkin' thing about it. Her kids, her house....ouch. What a shame.

Well, Camille is still up at eleven o'clock, I don't know how tired SHE is, but I would certainly like to say goodnight to her. Sweet as she is.....

aah, saturday...a day off...ha

This morning I tried to sneak out before Camille got up...but the bathroom door squeaked, and she was awake and chattering and holding her arms up. Seems heartless to say, "Rats!", but rats anyway.

Sonja K. was getting up, and we were soon joined by Jonathan. We let Rosie out of her cage, took her outside, and gave her food and water, and lots of attention. We tidied up the deck quick, then swept up the kitchen floor, and started the coffee. I let Camille push the button of the coffee grinder. Making coffee is time consuming these days, as the coffeemaker is broken. We have to boil the water in the kettle, then pour it little by little into the filter that rests on the top of the pot. We then made some sausage, toast, and scrambled eggs with green peppers and cheese. I fed seven of the kids while the older ones slept in and daddy went to the hardware store. When he got back, I helped him install a new outside spigot. Then I cleaned up the yard a bit as he is going to mow. I am taking a little break, and the girls are supposed to be picking up their toys and house-stuff from the yard. ha. They are fighting about it. Kathryn maintains she already did her share, and Sonja just came in with some stuff. Suzanne is busy making a house for her Webkin kitty out of a giant Lucky Charms box.....

It is extremely warm today. We are having this warm sunny weather that is just amazing, with no chance of rain. High eighties or maybe 90, a bit humid. Tomorrow is supposed to be in the nineties with humidity. I am SO thankful we have the pool filled and running. I keep telling the kids as soon as the yard is picked up, I will take them for a swim.

We are thinking of going to the beach this afternoon, cooking some hot dogs and coneys, and marshmallows, and watching the sunset. Daddy hasn't gone to the beach yet this year. It is nice to do things a family sometimes. It's good I am adventurous though, or these kids wouldn't go very many places.

I went on a small shopping excursion yesterday with Mali and Evelyn. We went to ToysRUs, which was rather disapointing. That store could be so much better! I passed up the temptation of getting a few new Fisher-Price dollhouse sets, it was hard. I love toys. Especially dollhouse stuff. I always buy the new stuff they put out, and it was hard not to ....but I am the one who likes it the most, and we do not NEED it. I got a few baby outfits for my brother's son and his wife who are having a baby. We also got two rafts for the pool, two boxes of 64count crayons (fun!), and some finger paints.

We the went to the dreaded Target and got what I hope is the end of the school supplies. Also some sneakers and and shoes for Evelyn, and a nice leather school bag that was 75%off....as were the shoes and sneakers, of course. Then on to Price Chopper for bread and milk and cheese and bananas and peppers and bakery sourdough bread ($1!) and angus london broil ($1.99 lb), 30 ears of corn, orange juice, peanutbutter........and a new patio set! I have been wanting one since our old table died a terrible death in a windstorm a few years back. I have looked and waited and watched for bargains. This set has a round table with an umbrella and 5 chairs. Not enough, but at least a place to put the food, and the kids have their small table, and we have lots of other chairs. It was $99, on clearance 75% off. I was SO glad it fit in the van.

We had the best dinner last night: bacon and tomato on sourdough bread and sweet corn. And ice water. It was just the best summer dinner. At 8:00. I was so hot from shopping in the drenching hot weather in the hot van that has no A/C in a hot jean skirt....my feet were even hot...no kidding, my Birkenstocks were slippery because my feet were sweating. Sorry. Anyway, by the time we got home and put stuff away, I NEEDED to go swimming. I took all the kids in while Mirielle started dinner....then we peeled corn in our bathing suits, and I put the new table together....it was worth a late dinner.

Now they are bugging me because I promised swimming...poor me, eh?

sneaking some time in....

This is for you, Joseph....Rosie is so sweet and fluffy...she thinks she is one of the kids...she is behaving herself much better lately....

The kids played house outside last night....at first they were playing "garage sale".....here is Suzanne making her house....

Charlotte Claire did something to Camille....so Sonja rescued Camille....

poor Camille...

Charlotte Claire needs to be nicer....but then Camille DID come into her house and steal her baby....(Rosie wanted to live with them, too)

What a nice cozy house.

I think this is Kathryn's house.






Jonathan's house, nestled between Ben's two cars (he is supposedly transferring the engine from the smashed one to the black one....)

This week I have been getting up extra early to sneak in some time on the computer....this morning I kept falling back to sleep.....and Camille woke up....so...I am on here anyway, but she is up along with Jonathan and Sonja. Camille took a big nap yesterday, so she stayed up 'til eleven last night. She was so good and cute and amusing. When the bigger kids got home from their youth meeting, she greeted them all by name, and showed them her snack (a cup of cheesies), and told them that the "monsters are back!" To Camille, "back" means they went back or they are gone. She somehow learned the concept of monsters, and when she starts talking about them she clings to me with these huge eyes. I have found it good through the years to occasionally have the youngest, or the toddler up later, just to enjoy.

I love my kids. Obviously, right? But I do, I just love them so much. I want them to make the right choices, to be happy, to turn to God. I want them to remain pure, and seek the things that are above. I want them to be kind and forgiving, and successful. I would and do give my life and time and heart for them.....it's like I am rooting for them, cheering for them to do the good. Praying for them, encouraging them, hoping for them.....and then I realize just a tiny little bit how it must be for God and all of man.....how He must want the best for us..

I do not see any evidence that they painted last night, I know Mirielle had a huge headache. They did manage to eat lots of cookies and have some more iced coffee drinks, judging by the empty cups around here and the empty cookie packages. It is rather hard for me to go to bed each night, they are so much fun.

Well, time to start the day for real....

wally world...

Well, Walmart is the place I love to hate. They have what I need, so I need to go there.......we needed another gallon of green paint, so off I went. Samuel, who needed sneakers, and Kathryn and Camille went along. A hundred bucks later, we had our sneakers and paint. And a few other things.

A sad story: apparently the nice older gentleman who mixed our paint the other night has been hospitalized, and is ill. I don't know the details, but the young "associates" that were mixing paint today, (and gossiping) let on that the ill worker's son is getting married this weekend, and maybe he's faking. Okay. What is sad about this ? A sixty something year old man playing hookey from Walmart to go to his own son's wedding? Leave him alone, girls.

Samuel has a fondness for McDonalds, so I used a coupon today and took him through the drivethrough. He was happy. We came home, put away the stuff, and made a beeline for the pool....heavenly. Well, if heavenly includes two crazy jumping-off-the-ladder little girls, who have no regard for their own safety. And a crazy puppy who just begs to come in for a swim (and, for that matter, a crazy mom who feels sorry for said puppy and lets her in).....Mirielle was nice and took Camille in and put her for her nap so mommy could swim and sit in the sun for a bit....now mommy needs to move it move it again. Dinner time approaches. I DO have a general idea what's for dinner. We still have no gas for the grill, so I am thinking of sloppy joes.....we have burger, and rolls.

I have some phone calls to make, and a house to tidy up before daddy comes home so it looks like I have done more than lounge in the sun and play on the computer......

teenagers...

I have five teenagers right now. Mirielle is 19, Joseph is 18, Aaron 16, Mali 15, and Samuel is 14. (but I also have Emily who is 24, Abigail 22 and Benjamin 20)...and of course Margaret, who is 12 and a half going on 16. So...my teenagers....

This week they are painting. After we got home from the beach and got the little ones in bed, they began again. Joseph is in Norway, so it was the four teens and Margaret. Now they aren't very particular about little splashes, drips, or spots of paint that fall where they may, except for Mirielle. She helps me scream at them. But they are so funny...when I went to bed last night I was still laughing my head off. Mali was up on the ladder painting the upper reaches of the foyer, and Sam though for some reason that this was a good time to throw a huge plastic spider at her....so Mali thought it was a good time to use a word we don't say here. Not a terribly bad word, but shocking and hilarious at the same time because we just don't say it here. They were laughing pretty hard at that.....while asking Sam what kind of idiot he was....

It seems they had nachos and popcorn with hotsauce last night, and there was a cup of coffee in the 'fridge that sloshed when I bumped it....they must've forgot their iced coffee. They are forever making these coffee shop type beverages.

None of this really bothers me though. They do rub elbows sometimes, argue a bit, but mostly they get along and it is lots of fun.

The beach was nice yesterday, when we finally got there. We left the house kind of messy, which rankled a bit but didn't kill me......I did have one very sweet 11 year old sweep up the kitchen and living room floors for me, and Mirielle did the dishwasher quick. Just feeding the kids and gathering the suits and towels and getting them dressed and hair brushed and the sand toys and my chair and the coolers and some cups and plates and paper towels and swim diapers and sunscreen....then we got it the van. First we picked up the two boys that were going with us, they live a bit over out of the way, so the ride seemed kind of long....then a stop at Price Chopper to get lunch. Seriously, how can lunch cost $97? I DID let them pick out 2 dozen donuts at the horrible price of $6.99 a dozen. It seems to be our beach ritual. Aaron was pushing Mali in a wheelchair, do not ask, so they got a cup of coffee for me and Mali held it. Counting the two friends, there were 14 of them with me. All hungry and wanting different things for lunch. We got a case of water bottles, soda, juice, Arizona iced-tea, ham, olive-loaf, turkey, rolls, chips, tostitos with lime (yum), cheese popcorn, cookies, peaches, three kinds of candy bars.....no wonder it cost so much. The rest of the ride, about an hour, was pleasant. I mean, driving to the beach on a sunny day with a cup of coffee and a donut. Those brats in the backseat devoured the rest.....

Of course I have no pictures of the beach, since a ghost charged my camera batteries for me. I remember one of the kids coming to me and offering to charge them. No one remembers this. No one knows where the batteries went. Aaron does have some pictures on his camera, so I will borrow those.

The water was warm and clear. And wavy. It stays shallow for such a long time, Camille and Charlotte Claire were just running around in the water, jumping in and letting the waves go over their heads. I was a foot behind Camille the whole time, and boy, she has ten times the energy I have. Aaron and Mali had gone for a walk, Sam was building castles with his friends, Mirielle fell asleep in the sun.....so it wasn't exceptionally relaxing, but I did ask the older ones for help after a while. Actually, I said if they don't take a turn with Camille we were going home. yeah, I could have worded it better. But the big kids are the ones who really pushed for the beach trip, so I think it is only fair that after a while they help out. And they did.

We ran out of green paint.....so off to Walmart I go today. We also have a very minimal amount of milk left. And we are out of propane for the grill. I don't feel like running around all day. But Mirielle's car isn't running, Abigail isn't here, she is still with Tonje, who is due in four days, and Benjamin is at work. Mirielle conveniently doesn't drive the 15 passenger van....so I get to go. Hmm, I should stop at the farmer's market, too.

I got up before the kids and it is nice. I dreamed about homeshooling last night because Paul sent me an article about it. Statistically, home schoolers score way higher, almost twice as high on the standardized tests they are required to take in some states. And the scores are consistently high, no matter the parents education, or their income. hmm. I have no doubt that they recieve a better education. Mainstream America is starting to notice this. I hope the government doesn't decide to regulate even more.

Kids are waking up....

new morning...

in my new green living room. It isn't quite finished, but almost. The hallway is half done, and the stairway is started. I don't love the color, but I don't hate it anymore. Which means it is staying. We are much too lazy to change something we don't absolutely hate. We keep walking around looking at it and saying things like, "hmm, it's not TOO bad..."...and well, it is fresh and clean and handprint-free! So, I don't hate it.....

The kitchen and dining area are going to be the same color, again. 'Cause I like it. It is called English Ivory, but it is like a buttercream color...not off white, not yellow, but in between. The kids just call it yellow, but it is very pale. Mali tried to talk me into a warm red shade to draw the living room colors into the kitchen and make it cozy, but I hadn't thought about it long enough and it seems pretty radical...so, for now, the same color...when we get to it....

This is the older kids' project, we are paying them to do it. Mirielle, Aaron, Mali, Samuel, and Margaret...and Kathryn and Evelyn like to help, too. They start each evening around 9, 9:30 after the kids are in bed....it works well that way, because the paint is dry in the morning.

So, this morning the house looks as bad as it did yesterday morning. Only worse, because nice Mirielle has been doing laundry and there are piles on the couch, again. And there are sheets covering the couches, to keep the paint off. And I found an opened can of vanilla frosting in the kitchen....and there are chip crumbs and sprinkles on the living room floor....those big kids have a party every night after we go to bed...they paint, and they eat, and then watch a movie...then sleep half the day...and when I tell them they should go to bed earlier, they just tell me, "MOMMMMMM! We can never do this! When school starts we have to GET UP in the morning again!!!" And I really don't mind that they eat things at night, they just don't have to leave so much evidence. The other night they made Cook'n Serve chocolate pudding.

Mirielle made the most excellent blueberry pies with the berries they picked, which I think is one of the most delicious things in the world......it was very very good. Not too sweet, not to tart. Speaking of Mirielle, she is leaving again!! She has accepted a nanny job in England. She will be going in September, and then leaving from there to go to Norway around December, and staying Norway for a year! That is way way too long for my dear friend and daughter to be gone! It is just plain not fair, and it actually hurts me. Like a punch, a physical pain in the stomach....I know that it has nothing to do with me, she has always wanted to travel. She tried some college, didn't love it, and insists she can pick it up again later. I know she will keep in touch, but it still is very painful. Who will cut coupons for me? Who will think it is a fun adventure to go grocery shopping and save lots of money and buy all the good shampoo? Who will listen to my dreams and laugh at my jokes? She is a rational voice here, sometimes irrational too, but she is responsible and funny and just a sunshine. Great, now I'm crying.....

So.....we are going to the beach today. These older kids are really wanting to go, to enjoy the summer since we are not going camping....so, since I listen to them and try to do things they want to do, we are going to the beach. Since I am so nice, I am also taking Caleb and Nathaniel, sons of our friends who have their hands full right now. Their dad is in remission for esophogeal cancer, and has a long appointment today with a scan, ect. They have eight kids and if we take two for the day, it lessens the load for the ones at home. So our 15 passenger van will be full to the brim.

Yes we are going to the beach and here I sit....I got up earlier than the kids today, took a shower, visited Miss Rosie out on the deck, made some coffee and got a bowl of Cocoa Puffs. And here I sit. I need to gather suits, and towels, and pack some lunch. Ah, I'll get to it. That is one thing about myself that has changed over the years....I have turned into a procrastinator. I have ceased to get things ready the night before because each day is just enough, I can't seem to make myself add more to it in preparation for the next....the exception to that is the school clothes, it is easier to get those out the night before.

I did not go on my walk yesterday, because I went in the pool with the kids three times. Not necessarily because I wanted to, but I have to be in there when Charlotte Claire and Camille are. They are like these little bobble-heads with their floaties on, even a wave of water or a good splash and they are sputtering. I have them either in my arms or in my reach.....sometimes I will give one to Kathryn and one to Evelyn and swim and do some excercises....Rosie the dog came swimming twice yesterday. She loves the water...she jumps up on the side of the pool and whines.....so I had Aaron lift her in for me a few times....she can swim across the pool, but she get a bit nervous and wants to be held.....she just loves it....when we put her back out, she jumps right back up and wants to get back in......

Part of me feels like we shouldn't go to the beach because we are in the middle of this painting project and we have so much to do around here. And I despise that because that is GROWN-UP thinking. I do not want to think like a grown-up. So, we are going to the beach.....

splashing around 'til they fall asleep....

Kathryn in the pool... Jonathan....

Evelyn, Camille, Suzanne, Sonja, Jon with me....

Withe the temperature in the eighties today, and lots of sun, it was a nice day for a swim...After an hour or so, we took a break in the yard, and I brought out some lunch....peanut butter and fluff, or ham or turkey....and water and cheesies.....I sat in the sun for a bit while Camille and Charlotte Claire went on the swings, and the kids went back in the pool....then I scooped up the little ones, and back in we went. Camille is one crazy toddler...she likes to jump off the ladder into the water...I have to watch her every second. After a while, I was waterlogged and had had enough....we got back out and Camille wanted to go in the baby swing....Charlotte Claire was pushing her...and her eyes were closing....okay, nap time....the kids are all clean and cool and refreshed, watching "Thumbelina", while Camille takes a nap. Sam and Jonathan are watching "Sponge Bob" in Joseph's room. Aaron and Mali took a long bike ride, and Mirielle is making home made iced tea for the girls. Margaret is probably reading.

Today has not just been a wonderful day. No, it started out quite difficult. See, this place is rather torn apart with the painting and all....and last night it came to an abrupt halt as we were all a bit shocked at the paint color....but now we are okay with it, and it will stay....at least for a while. The big kids don't want to paint during the day, I don't blame them. It is much smarter to work at night when the little ones are in bed. Anyway, the couches are away from the walls, the other furniture too...there is painting paraphenalia all over....added to the usual clutter, and I don't like it. This morning I discovered one of my favorite picture frames had been stepped on. Then Sonja knocked down a vase of flowers, and the vase broke. The vase was made by Emily in art class...and I really liked it. I didn't really feel like cleaning up and sweeping and doing dishes and cleaning counters....and the bigger kids had watched a movie after I went to bed, so they were in bed for a few hours after I got up....I got kind of frustrated.....but then I started to really think about it....(I also got the kids to pitch in and help clean up)...I cut up two cantaloupe and a watermelon, cubed it and put it in the 'fridge for later, and thought..... " I am not going to let a messy house weigh on me so. " I really had to fight to get my head out of water, so to speak. I had to fight against depressing thoughts. Why is it that sometimes it just seems so overwhelmingly hard to deal with things? I felt so exhausted, and like I just did not want to clean up AGAIN....So, what did I fight against? Thoughts. Powers and principalities, spirits. And the amazing thing is, when I turn to God and pray and fight against these things, I get happy. And, the more amazing thing is that then I am able to help others. In this case, the kids. They also can get quite grumbly, and I was able to encourage them to also take up the battle. And, the house is not perfect. Evelyn cleaned and shined up the bathroom, we swept and mopped, did the dishwasher, I cleaned and shined the front of the 'fridge, cleaned the microwave, the fronts of the dishwasher and stove, and then we went outside for our swim. It wasn't too bad, once I stopped feeling sorry for myself.

Now I need to think about dinner.....oh, will I ever learn? I feel like taking a giant nap, but I am not really tired, just a bit dozey from sitting here kind of writing, and kind of watching this movie with the kids....I had some coffee, courtesy of Kathryn, and it didn't work. I wish the cook would come in and make us a nice nutritious dinner. Like grilled chicken and zuchini with yellow squash, and maybe some grilled potato slices.....but it ain't gonna happen. So, .........