my camera broke again....on halloween night....

These are the last pictures my dead camera has taken. Sonja dropped it tonight, and I think the lens is jammed beyond fixing. My camera died on Halloween night. Here are the last pictures....Jonathan, a.k.a. Superman, with Abigail the Alien.... Kathryn the pirate with Camille, Santa Claus.

Superman with Suzanne, a teacher.

Charlotte Claire, the tired little kitty....(in McDonalds after trick or treating in 3 neighborhoods)


Superman sucking his thumb, Sonja (Fancy Nancy), and Grace (their cousin, my dear niece's daughter) as a princess....at McDonalds....

Kathryn the pirate with pink boots.



Superman sure is in alot of picures....here he is with Emily the Environmentalist. She was going to a girls' party after our trick-or-treating, and they had to dress as something using the first letter of their name....

Samuel, some kind of non-commisioned officer....with Camille Claus, and Charlotte Kitty....

He had the time of his life tonight...his favorite take: an old man gave him a baggie with a $10 Japanese dollar from world war II....and a few old German coins.....the poor old man. It made me sad. The coins were carded and carefully labeled. He sure picked the right boy to give some to......I told Sam he probably would have had some interesting stories to tell, the old man.

We took the kids to a nice neighborhood, seeing that most of our neighbors are corn fields and cows. Then, back into the van to another neighborhood.....as they ate candy all the way there...they went to quite a few houses, then back into the van......one more neighborhood, just a few streets, and they were giving up. Sonja had to go to the bathroom and her ankles hurt....Margaret didn't feel well. Charlotte Claire wanted to be carried. Oh, she was so funny. She enjoyed herself so much. She liked walking through the leaves, the night was so warm and mild. Just going up people's porch steps, and seeing the Jack-o-lanterns were big deals for her. She didn't really know what it all was, but when she said , "Trick-or-Treat", they gave her candy! She mostly took it in her hand, and said thank-you....then took great pleasure in going down the steps, one jump at a time. Oh, to be two years old and enjoy life so. No thought of getting to the next house, or gathering up alot of candy. That's why I love having so many kids.

We never did have dinner tonight, until we went to McDonalds at I don't even want to say what time. They had some snacks after school, and were much too excited for much else. Then, they were eating candy.....but still, I get the bad mommy award. But if you could measure their happiness, I would get a blue ribbon. We went into McD's, used the bathroom, and they all got to pick either a chicken sandwich or a double cheeseburger ($1 menu), and I got some fries for them to share, plus an ice water each...(free).......the lady behind the counter asked me if they were all my kids, and I said all but one.....she asked how many I had, and I said 16. She did not believe me. It may have had something to do with how funny I looked, don't ask, but she did not believe me. She said she had never heard of anyone having that many kids. So, apparently she went up to my sister, who was with me, and asked her if it was true.....

Well, we got home and got Charlotte Claire into bed, she had already slept all the way home in the van, but she was pretty tired. The other kids dumped their candy into piles all over the living room floor. This is apparently the "funnest" part. I had them pick up and vacuum before we left this afternoon in anticipation of this event. I wanted to take a picture, but my camera was broken.

So here I am, thankful they had a nice time. I sure did.

happy halloween

the kids just got home on the bus, and we are to begin the fun process of getting everyone dressed up. We don't buy the costumes, we have aquired a Superman outfit for Jon from a friend of a friend.....and, Charlotte Claire's kitty costume has been around here for a while...oh yeah, I got it at Walmart a few years ago after halloween for 75%off. And I made Sonja's Fancy Nancy dress last year, when she was a princess. The kids usually just gather stuff from around the house....so, I'll try to get some pictures....the fun part is, the 3 little ones dressed up for school, and will wear something tonight, and maybe something different for the Fall feast at church tomorrow......so we will have lots of fun......

At the same time, we have to make sure the travelers to Canada have their passports, and Molly has her birthcertificate and photo I.D., and some money, and some snacks for the trip. They will be leaving about when we are leaving for trick-or-treating....just fun and chaos....and I didn't make dinner yet, so I am thinking one burger from the drive-through, and coming home and having something later.....the kids might be too excited to eat very properly, anyway. I get so caught up in their excitement, I swear I have never grown up.....I am trying to decide if I want to dress up too.....

Today, we are just blessed with beautiful weather. Sunny and warm, almost 60 degrees. I went out in the hot tub with Jonathan and Charlotte Claire while Camille napped. It was lots of fun, and I certainly didn't take it for granted like I might have a month ago, when this weather was common.....


Well, time to get moving....

busy evening.....

Jon and Charlotte Claire were excited to go bye-bye today. Camille is smart. She knew we were going somewhere, and when I put her down to take her picture, she was furious....

She looks so sweet in her little pink coat. It was like $2 last spring at a garage sale....Kathryn is such a great helper.....

The new Fisher-Price remote control Dinosaur, in the plastic case, just push the button for a scary demonstration.....at least one little girl thought it was scary. Jonathan just plain wanted it. For $129.99, I don't think so....

Desolate. That's how the trees look when the wind has whipped their leaves off.....

Joseph, Aaron, and Molly are going to Ottowa, Canada, for the weekend. I just found out. Oh well. I am glad for them, they are part of a wonderful youth group. That leaves fewer of us for Trick-or Treating. Emily and Abigail are going along with me, with Sam, Margaret, Kathryn, Evelyn, Suzanne, Sonja, Jonathan, Charlotte Claire, and Camille. We have only been doing this for a few years now. It's funny to be so against something for so many years, and then question why you thought it was so wrong....and change your mind. I personally didn't think it was too bad, but Paul didn't care for it. Come to find out, he just doesn't care for Halloween, he would rather do other things....he has no problem with me taking the kids, and wishes us the best of fun, and would come if we wanted him to. But you know how it is when someone is just along because they are asked to, and don't really want to be there? It's better to just leave him home, and have lots of fun without worrying about whether he wants to get going now.....It's hard to explain, but I enjoy being the pilot of the big white van sometimes, stopping for a coffee if I please, and taking all the live long day.....he is not a tryrant, just someone who doesn't like to galavant like I do....but we sure do like each other.

sooo tired

I am heading in for a nap, which I hate to do, because it is a waste of time. But on the other hand, I love naps. I have to leave the older kids here watching the younger ones, Camille is in bed, and Charlotte Claire is going in.....

Camille was a real fuss again last night. She was just awake for a long time. I wonder if her throat hurts or something. She has no fever, but is a little bit stuffy. She wouldn't even nurse last night, just wanted to be held. And I wanted to sleep.....

I had an adventurous day. Kathryn stayed home today (I got tired of Camille emptying out what we call the "pony drawer", where we keep the brushes, hair elastics ((ponies)), and barettes....and some pennies, other assorted small items. So last night we put the contents of the drawer into a plastic bag. Including the hairbrushes)....so today, Kathryn could not find the hairbrush. She missed the bus. She could have gone on second trip, but begged not to. Yeah, I know, I could have sent her, but she hates going in late....and she has been asking for a day off for a while. I am glad she was here. I had to go to Walmart. Camille pooped halfway through the shopping trip. I chose not to drag the kids back to the bathroom and change her, but hurry and finish, and change her in the van. Bad decision. She was so fussy. Her bottom was sore. She cried for the last 15-20 minutes of our trip. I feel sorry for Charlotte Claire and Jonny when stuff like that happens, because they are being so good, and I like to enjoy things more. So, I should have just changed her. But I didn't.....

I got the kids each a little carton of chocolate or pink milk, and a 30cent bag of chips. So, it was fun. We came home and had some leftover soup for lunch, and put Camille to bed. Exciting, eh? Charlotte Claire was good in the store except when I let her out at the register to sit on the bench in front with Kathryn and Jon....and she took off to play with the outrageously expensive toy cell phones at a register a few down from me. ($2.98!).....I went and got her, and buckled her back into the cart. She didn't even fuss. I think she knew darn well she was being bad. And a stinky award goes to Wal-mart for stocking all the check-out aisles with those overpriced toy phones, just at toddler level.

Good night....

a little bit of snow, a lot of excitement

The kids went running out, apparently snow is fun for them.... Jon's feet look a little cold. Yum, fresh snow for Charlotte Claire.......they didn't stay out there for more than 2 minutes....

They did get all dressed warm this morning, and were out for 6 or 7 minutes. They just aren't used to the cold. I did go for my walk this afternoon. It was freezing, and a cold wind was blowing. The high today was around 39 degrees.....and maybe I'm crazy, but I thought it felt very refreshing. Better cold than too hot.

I made Jon a neat paper airplane tonight, it doesn't really even fly very well, and you'd have thought I gave him a million bucks....the really likes it. I hate it when kids love things that are so temporary and breakable.....I cleaned out my purse, and set aside some of my really long grocery receipts for him to play with tomorrow with his cash register.

My mother-in-law called tonight, she is in Florida for the winter, and she said it was cold down there. Her heat ran all night last night. Strange weather.

Paul suggested tonight that we switch Charlotte Claire and Camille around, so that Camille is in her own room. I'm not sure I want to risk Charlotte Claire changing her excellent sleeping habits. There is something nice about a two year old that loves going to bed at night. We do cheat and put her in bed with her bottle, but it doesn't seem to hurt anything. What do the experts know, anyway?

I would never consider myself an expert at child-raising. Because each child is different, and I find myself stumped about things I hadn't encountered before. But some things I have learned:

1. Never use the crib, or bedroom as a punishment place. It is a gooood, nice place. Naps are good, yummy. Going night-night is cuddly and good, NEVER use it as a threat. Mommy and Daddy have the advantage of marketing these things to be as appealing as possible.

2. Wait until they are ready to potty-train, if you want to do it the easiest way. Don't listen to your mother-in-law. I have trained 14 kids so far, and I choose the path of least resistance. So far, that has been to: encourage them to use the toilet when they are old enough, and then when they are up for it, do it. They do it all by themselves in just a few days, with some encouragement. My experience is when you push it too soon, you end up cleaning up some messes, and it becomes a battle.

3. Don't go head to head with a two year old unless you have to. It doesn't prove anything to win all the battles. If they seriously can't do something, like play with the sugar container or help themselves to cheerios, then it's smart to say no. And mean no. But if they just want some band-aids for their dolly, or to do something themselves that you have no patience for, let it go......

4. The kids have to learn to listen. Especially when it concerns parking lots. Call me crazy, but I can't stand when I see kids running ahead of their parents, with cars backing out and speeding around corners. I make them stay with me until we are at the van. A few months back ,one of the girls started to take off for the van from just 15 or so feet away, and a car was backing up. I shouted, and she stopped in her tracks. I praised her to the skies for listening, and was thankful nothing horrible happened. And of course used the opportunity to reiterate why it's important to listen to mommy.

I am such an idiot. I don't consider myself an expert, but I can go on and on with my opinions. One thing I find important is to talk nicely to the kids. I hate it when I go to Wal-mart and hear the mommies just snapping and crabbing at the little kids. I have been known to cry. And I stand there like a fool, an resolve to be much more gentle myself, especially when I am feeling stressed. I am thankful God can show me my lack, because only when I am in need about the way I am, can He help me.

school today? ahhh....

Let me start with saying I am tired. I didn't get to go to bed early last night as planned because I remembered that Molly was not home yet. She was out celebrating a friend's birthday, she was with a very responsible older sister of the friend, a good girl, but still. A mom cannot just go to bed when the 14 year old daughter isn't home yet. Then Jon cried for some juice, so it was good mom was still up anyway, or he would have woken up the 3 girls. So, finally to bed.....and Miss Camille had an awake spell last night. I got her out of bed SIX times! Each time, I snuggled with her, nursed her, rocked her, and put her back in her little pink bed. I tip-toed back to my nice warm bed, got all settled in, and she would cry again....sometimes right away, sometimes in 5-10 minutes, right when I started dozing. When I picked her up, she would whisper, "shh", or "nigh, nigh"...the fifth time I tried to nurse her, she refused, and said, "ba, ba''''....yeah, right. Finally, after time #6, she stayed in bed and went to sleep. Now, if she had her own room, or if Paul didn't have to get up and go to work, I would try something different. But I don't want to get into that now. The fact is, I am tired. And the thought crossed my mind not to get up and wake up the school kids this morning. But I did. Here is Sonja K., all ready to go.
She is in first grade. The perfect age, 6 years old. She still likes wearing tights to school. And she is happy about school.

Suzanne is having her "stay home" day. Just a random day where she gets to stay home, to get some extra attention. She has gone outside 3 times this morning, looking for snow. We didn't get very much, it didn't stay on the ground, but we got enough on the deck and picnic table, that she has two snowballs in the freezer to show Jon when he wakes up.

The thought that got me out of bed this morning: Emily's "I have learned to do what I do not like doing".....and last night, when I couldn't get Camille settled in, (she was playing with my face in the dark, and just enjoying herself), I thought of having another baby. And I still would take one gladly. What is wrong with me? Morning sickness, fatigue, back-aches, sleeplessness....and I would do it again in a heartbeat. Why? Honestly, why? There is either a disconnect between my rational mind and my heart, or God has blessed me with a trust in Him about accepting the children. I think it is both. The disconnect is from God, too.

Suzanne is preparing cocoa for her and Jon, anticipating him waking up. She is also making them some bagels. She will be blessed today, and so will Jon, Charlotte Claire, Camille, and I.

I need to get moving here. I plan to stay home today, and hopefully for the rest of the week, too. I have laundry, and sorting to do. And of course the typical other stuff. And I don't really like to do it, but I have learned to do what I don't like to do. Yesterday, I was ready to sit down and take a break. Charlotte Claire and Camille were settled into bed, finally! and Jon was dozing on the couch. My chair and my computer were calling my name, but so was the huge load of darks in the dryer. And Jon's bedding was in the washer, needing to be dried. So, I went in and took care of the laundry. Did I love it? Na. But, if I was out in the working world, you can bet I would be doing alot of things I wouldn't love doing. That's life. And that is the discipline I need here at home, when I don't really have a boss, or anyone to hold me accountable. And believe me, I could work harder, but sometimes my old body protests too much....

cozy yummy dinner....

Jonathan, all jammied up and ready for bed. He is a surprisingly good boy when he is sick....he doesn't just milk it, enjoying the laying around and being waited on like some of them do....he actually offered to help pick up when I was going to vacuum today. And he insisted on coming to the dinner table with a fever of 102. He didn't eat much, but he wanted to save his plate. Then he spilled his cup of water all over his plate when he was getting down. I felt bad for him. I told him I would make him another good plate of food tomorrow, same stuff, when he was feeling better. Then, we watched "The Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown" or whatever it's called....and the kids all got to have some ice cream, which we bought for our company who didn't end up coming. He didn't even eat his. So, I told him he could have some for breakfast if he wants. These two may look sweet, but don't let them fool you. They are sitting in a hula hoop. I am having a lot of trouble with Charlotte Claire being too rough with Camille. Some of it is just strong-arming her, trying to protect her. Pulling her away from things. Pushing her down when she's getting into stuff. But the other kind of being rough is harder to deal with, more disturbing, although probably normal. She just will go and lay on her. Or sit on her....or hit her with a book.....so, each time she does this, I scold her firmly, give her a little swat on the behind, lead her to a kitchen chair, and tell her that it is not nice to hit baby, or whatever she has done. And she cries for a while. She hasn't figured out yet that she can just hop off the chair, she sits there and cries until I get her....just a few minutes. And then she hugs me, and tells baby sorry. She likes being my friend, and I think she is getting it that I am upset with her when she is mean.

She is the very definition of energy. But, she is also so sweet and huggy. She likes being carried around by the big kids. She seems a bit lost during the day. If I only had three kids all the time, it would be different than it is with just the 3 during the day. They are used to alot of attention. So it is challenging when I am the only one here, to do the diapers, dishes, floors, laundry, and give them attention.....I feel I have to really watch to protect Camille....but don't get me wrong. Charlotte Claire is not a monster. She doesn't do this all day long or anything, in fact, sometimes she plays so nice with Camille. Sweet, sweet Camille.

Our dinner tonight was very nice. Benjamin was not here, nor was Emily the nurse, or of course M., in Canada, and Molly at a friend's birthday. But it was still busy and noisy at the table, with Paul and I, Abigail, Joseph, Aaron, Samuel, Margaret, Kathryn, Evelyn, Suzanne, Sonja, Jonathan, Charlotte Claire, and Camille. We sort of have a game plan. The plates are stacked on the table. Forks, napkins, salt, pepper, (several), cups. Then someone gets the drinks, 3 pitchers, one water, one something, one something else (iced tea, or other diet drinks)....We bring the food to the table, and call the kids. The usually sit in the same places, though they don't have assigned seats. Sometimes I pawn off Camille, sending her highchair down to Aaron or Molly. It lessens the stress on me as I try to fix plates. Paul will be cutting up the meat, I'll prepare some baked potatoes, then we fill the plates of the younger ones, say Suzanne on down. Then we pass down the plates and the bigger kids serve themselves. If we are having something from a really hot baking dish, we usually serve out everyones' food. Then we pray for the food, thanking God for his blessings. We seem to have the younger ones near us, and they get their subtle lessons like: no elbows on the table, don't lick off your fingers, don't reach - ask for someone to PLEASE pass it, don't smack, ect. But like I said, it's subtle. It goes by too quickly, then there's cleanup.....we usually all pitch in to carry the plates to the counter....someone loads the dishwasher, someone washes the tables, someone cleans the counters, someone sweeps, I usually take care of whatever leftovers we happen to have. (We have lots of roast beef left, so I am going to make a nice stew/soup, with biscuits for a cold snowy/windy day, tomorrow)

I don't know if anyone cares about this or not, but it may be interesting for me to go back and read someday when just Paul and I are eating our dinner in front of the television, to lonely to eat at the table......

Paul made a fire in the woodburning stove. Our furnace burns either wood or oil. Which is very nice, because wood is relatively cheap. And it gets it warm in here.

I am not feeling so great. My throat hurts, and I am very tired. I just noticed this after dinner tonight. I never seem to get sick enough to warrant being in bed with someone else just taking over, no, I just feel generally lousy, and look and seem okay, and don't get a break. Oooh, feeling a bit sorry for myself....I have to watch for that one, because that can be a downward slope...

I know I keep mentioning the weather, but it is a bit harsh for us here in the northeast, for October. The wind is so loud and strong. The last of the leaves are going, and it snowed for a while today. No accumulation here, but it's a night not fit for man nor beast, none the less.

I think I'll go to bed on the early side. I wish I had a big spacious bedroom, spotlessly clean with no clothes thrown across the dresser-top, and a nice big fireplace, warm and cozy.

In fact, since I'm dreaming, I wish I had a fireplace in the livingroom, too. My parents had a propane fireplace, it looked like a log burning, and warmed the living room up. But then I would have to keep the kids away from it. I am going on too much, I am tired. Sorry.

windy, cold, snowy, rainy day with sick kids

and with that as the title, what else can I say? Actually, Jonathan is the only one sick, so far. Just moments after I took this picture of him, he started to throw-up. And of course I was nursing the tired and fussy Camille, who had already waited for mommy long enough...I had to put her down, and rush over to Jon.....I need a bowl, quick, so I grabbed the wipes container, took the wipes out really quickly, and put that under his chin. It wasn't such a bad mess, as he has only had a few drinks today. Poor boy. And poor Camille. I am so apologetic today. Charlotte Claire's biggest concern during all this was the abandoned wipes. She was just chattering away about it....(I was a bit concerned that Jon was going to get stuff on the couch, but shh, don't tell anyone)....anyway, Charlotte found another wipes container, and put the wipes away properly. Here she is playing with her dolly and dolllhouse....

She takes such tender care of her dolly....makes me wonder why she hits Camille....

I didn't get a chance to write anything yesterday....I was pretty busy here, and when I took a few minutes to go on the computer, I checked my e-mail, and had one from M., as she likes to be referred to on here. I had to answer her, and then it was time to go shopping. I am so glad I didn't bring Jonathan. Molly and I just took Camille. So, it was alot easier, and more productive, and fun in a way, but not as fun as bringing along a bunch of them. I have never been one to leave the kids home to make it easier, we live a ways away from everything, and it's nice for them to get out and about, too. And how can you go past a train, bus, tractor, or race-car without someone to point it out to?

Yes, we did some shopping. Mostly groceries. But I did pick up a few really adorable outfits for my niece, Susan. We are going to a baby shower for her on Sunday. I already got her some things for next summer, but I got her a few nice little things for now. I really like brown and light blue together.

We were going to have Susan and Thomas, and the other boys that were here last week, for dinner again tonight. One of the boys, Thomas' younger brother, is going back home to Norway on Friday. But with Jonathan sick, we had to cancel. Susan does not need a fever/flu whatever it is he has....the kids are going to be bummed when they get home from school and find out they aren't coming over. Oh well.

Well, at my favorite store I got some Angus roast beef for $1.99 a pound. I got one for tonight, as I thought we were having company, and 4 for the freezer. We are having a nice dinner tonight, for a weeknight....but it is so windy and rainy and cold, it will be cozy in here. I really like giving them a nice dinner. I don't particulary like all the work that goes along with it, but I like the good smells, and the warmth, and, not to be too much like a corny television commercial, but I like when they appreciate and enjoy the food.

So last night, Molly and I had gone to three stores, plus, shh, a stop at DunkinDonuts for a coffee and a latte, and shh two glazed chocolate donuts....Molly said we really shouldn't, and I said, heck it's dinner.....enjoy. It helped me shop rationally, as I wasn't hungry. Anyway, as we trudged to the register at the last store, with our cart overflowing with groceries (Camille was in the stroller, as she was tired, so we had even the child-seat filled with stuff)....I told Molly we were almost done. Just had to unload it all at the register, then put it all in the van, then go home and bring it all in and put it away.......groan....the way home, which is like 35 minutes, Camille was crying. So we sang to her. And sang to her. She finally conked out half way home......and woke up when we pulled in the drive-way.....

Charlotte Claire was still up when we got home, so happy to see me. She loves to help put stuff away, but it would really be more help if she just stayed out of the bags and let us do it. But I don't tell her that. I feel like such a liar saying, "Thank you honey, you are such a nice helper.."

So, by the time I got stuff put away, and baby in bed, and clothes out for the kids for today, there was no way I was going to turn on the computer.......

I had a dentist appointment today, I HATE going to the dentist. I would rather have a baby with no pain medicine ( and I do know what I am talking about, I had several of those, even some with pitocin) than go to the dentist. But I lucked out, Paul hasn't been in a while, so he took the kids and went in my place....we go every six months. We used to have such a good system, all going together....then there were too many, so we split up and each took some kids....now we have too many for that, too, so we are split up even more....with ME going even more.....and with that stupid water dispenser in the waiting room, making it so hard to sit there reading the People magazines, because the kids all want drinks.....

Anyway, today has been crazy. I got the little ones into bed, Jon fell asleep on the couch, I made some lunch, and sat down....and Charlotte Claire came back out, didn't stay in for her nap...she's going back in for another try.....the first trip kids are home now. So, .....

thunder and lightening....

wonderful, cozy, frightening....a cold front is moving through the Northeast, bringing some rain, and a few thunder storms. One crash of thunder sounded like it was right in the front yard....Charlotte Claire was sitting at the table playing "Chutes and Ladders", and she scrambled up, across the table, and flew into Kathryn's arms....her and Jon were huddled on my lap within seconds....then a few more loud ones, and it passed over. The kids were concerned that the power might go out, so I encouraged them to pick up a few things so we wouldn't trip (aren't I awful?).....and Sam got his wind-y (no batteries necessary) flashlight out.....but, the power didn't go out.

More colder weather is coming. Tuesday night/Wednesday morning, it will be 20 degrees in the upper atmosphere (5,000 ft.), and the water temperature of Lake Ontario is in the 50's. Perfect conditions for lake effect snow. Now, we usually don't get much snow in October, but we have.....it could happen. Or, it could just be rainy with a few flurries mixed in......there are areas just miles from here that really get pounded with snow, like Oswego. It's right on the southeast corner of Lake Ontario, and the wind goes across the lake, and wham....also, the areas directly east of the lake get hammered with snow. We are south-east of the lake, south of Oswego, but we get out fair share....the thing is, Abigail commutes to college in Oswego. Even when they grow up, they are still mommy's kiddies....

I am going grocery shopping with Molly tomorrow. She cut the coupons today, and is going to try to save us some money. Mariel will be proud of her. Speaking of Mariel, I miss her SO much. She is our healthy eating conscience. One of our first dinners we had when she was gone, we had corn for a vegetable, in addition to mashed potatoes! She would not have allowed that....two starches...two many carbs.....her commitment to a healthy lifestyle has not totally changed us all, but it has rubbed off in a postive way. Molly and Margaret go running almost daily now. And Aaron does, too. And I go for my walks......

I know I am not a very good blogging friend. I don't always answer questions (sorry!), don't play tagging games, it just doesn't appeal to me...but I do read alot of blogs, and enjoy them. I have learned alot, and have been encouraged to some helpful things. I realize that I am not alone, there are many others out there with a lot on their plates, and some with very big issues to deal with. I do pray for my new "friends"....at first I felt funny about it, but then I heard a friend speaking about how God puts people on our hearts, and we need to be faithful there. And pray for people if we are compelled to. I thought praying for "virtual" people was kind of strange, but I have realized that you out there are as real as I am. We are all in this battle of life, and we need all the help we can get. Thanks for reading......and thanks for writing....

401 posts!!!

Holy cow, I need a life....nah, I just like to write....and dinner is cooking, so I don't have much time...I just wanted to add something to my list of things I am thankful for....something very important.....FRIENDS....

Last evening I was able to spend some time with two of my best friends in the whole world...not long enough, but it was nice. We three are moms, and have 35 kids all together between us...so no end of things to talk about.....

I have alot of truly good friends in my church....we don't see each other as much as we would like, but when we do, we have some great fellowship.....and, the chicken is burning.....

the cat is in the carseat....

taking a bath. Good thing it's the spare carseat, that Charlotte Claire uses for her dollies.....I ran into a woman today, who was lamenting that there are halloween costumes and patterns for dogs, but not for cats.....and I thought I was crazy....

As I get older, I notice my tolerance for noise decreases....especially non-essential noise. Banging the spoon handles on the table, singing to the mp3 players, slamming, banging, arguing. Help! I can't get sick of this game, I am in the middle of it! Has it gotten louder in here? Hey, maybe that's why older people develop trouble hearing, maybe it's just mercy.....a little gift....

My niece's husband, his brother, and two friends just stopped in to pick up Joseph....they are going off on a late night adventure to Applebees or Denny's. Well, this house was so neat and clean this morning. Vacuumed, swept, toys put away....then I was gone for a while, and life happened....there are clothes, hair ponies, barrettes, socks, toys.....just scattered.....a 15 minute clean-up, and it would be fine....but did they give us 15 minutes notice? And that is just as well, because I am tired.......I do not feel like cleaning up tonight. Wait, do I ever feel like cleaning up?

My daughter Emily, the nurse, said something the other day that has stuck with me....she said,""" I have gotten very good at doing what I do not like...." Isn't that one of the hallmarks of being an adult? You don't have to love it, just do it.

All the whining I do about the weather is going to just get worse, I tell you. Having several children on a nice warm day cannot even compare to what it's like to have several children on a freezing, rainy or snowy day. Because they are IN THE HOUSE. And, this house has no play room....just the cozy little living room. Which connects to the kitchen via two doorways, making it a perfect set-up for the chase each other around the cirlce game....which gets old for me very fast.....last year, I bought a $19 mini-trampoline, which took the edge off their energy levels - they used alot of energy fighting about who's turn it was, and who took too much time on their turn....it is out on the deck right now, the covering for the springs has come off. I may just go buy another one.....

I was going to go out for my walk today, I put on my leggings and sweatshirt, and then I glanced out at the pool in the back yard and saw how hard it actually was raining...bucketsfull...and it was chilly.....so I deferred 'til later, which never came.....I think I need a treadmill. The Gazelle eliptical that Paul so nicely bought for me absolutely kills my knees.

Where in the heck can I possible put a treadmill???

Right about here I think I will change my thinking. It's funny, I think of myself as an optimistic person....but sometimes I get these glimpses , and I really wonder....

So, things I am thankful for tonight:

1. Our home. Just right for us.

2. That we can all fit at the tables now for dinner. I had forgotten how joyous I was at that a few months ago...

3. The peace, harmony, and lack of strife that comes from living a life for God......despite the noise here, there is a different kind of peace.

4. Our big white 15 passenger van. It allows me to plan outings with the kids that aren't limited to just 3 or 4 passengers like a car would be....

5. I have a washing machine that works, and a dryer that works.

6. I am thankful for all of the kids, but right now, Camille just shines. She can stand in the middle of the floor unassisted for a few seconds at a time, and the other kids all clap. Today, I was calling Sonja's name, and Camille started copying me....and she is so huggy! There is nothing like picking her up and getting that snuggle!

7. Charlotte Claire. She is just precious. She says, "Mom, hey Mom!" Sometimes I can't understand everything she says, but she is patient. She just keeps repeating, and pointing, until I get it....then she shakes her head yes so adamantly.

8. Jon. Jonathan Robert is intense. But he is so smart and funny. Everything is so important to him. He went to the hardware store and the BigM today with daddy. What an adventure.

9. My husband. He doesn't always understand why I do what I do, but he gives me freedom anyway. We are so different, but somehow on the same page. We work together, not against each other, and still love each other very much.

10. I am thankful that football isn't on tv all year long....I mostly tune it out when it's on....I can stare at the screen deep in thought, and not even see that fantastic play.......occasionally, I will watch it and enjoy it, but for the most part, if it didn't exist at all, I wouldn't even notice...

Yes, thankfulness always trumps whining and complaining......

day out and about

Suzanne, Kathryn, and Jonathan......we went to Chinese for lunch....the kids didn't have school, so I took eleven of them out and about....(Em was at work, Ab was at college, Ben went to work, Mariel is still far away in Canada, and Joseph stayed home in the nice quiet house and played his guitar....hmm, he's smart)

Charlotte Claire likes her ice cream.... Camille sat here for over an hour, and was happy.....those sugar fried donuts make anyone happy, I guess....

They sure can get our money's worth....

We went to the Rescue Mission store after here, and found a few good things. Aaron and Molly came over to me with these giant trench coats and big black boots, saying, "Please, please..." Take them off.....I found some things in the 50cent bin...

I made a quick stop in the Game Stop for Sam's birthday present....his birthday was August 2, and I finally got his game....

Then, on to the: grocery store! The kids were thrilled!!! not. So, after a massive bathroom break, we started shopping - and nice mom that I am, I let them stop in the bulk foods sections, and each get a bag and pick out some candy. Aaron is 15, and Molly 14, and Sam is 13, so they are old enough to supervise....I got half way through the store before they were finished. Which is good, because the train of us all going up and down the aisles is quite slow. I mean, if one or two kids walk down the middle of the aisle and get in someones way, oh well....but when 5 or six are meandering around.....I try to make them stay in a row....

We never ended getting our pumpkins...we will have to go tomorrow or something....Jon was very disapointed, but it was dusk when we passed the pumpkin place....

Groceries are expensive. I just buy the cheap stuff , and we have our economy meal, spaghetti, once a week. I buy alot of chicken because it is cheap. And chicken simmered in cream of celery or cream of chicken soup is very good over rice or potatoes....I am hoping the turkeys are cheap again around thanksgiving so I can put 4 or 5 in the freezer. I try to stock up on things when they are on sale....in the fall, we always buy 5 or 6 cases of crushed tomatoes to last through the winter... well, Camille is tired, so I will go on and on about my shopping habits some other time....

frost on the pumpkins

frost on the back yard...

and frost on our screen door.... frost on the chair Joseph put in the tree in the front yard....

frost on my nice Inglesina Zippy left out in the front yard overnight - oops!!!

Camille can ride a bike....

Look mom, no hands!

Needless to say, it is chilly here. Today is forecasted to be clear and sunny, and not too chilly. The kids want to go pumpkin picking. We need some groceries. Can I combine the two things? Bring 10 or 12 kids to the grocery store? Then to the pumpkin patch? hmmmm......and I want to get more apples. Other direction.....this apple place I have gone to sells large paper grocery bags full of apples, all varieties, for $5 a bag. We have gone through 4 bags so far. We are getting spoiled. And now they are almost gone....

Whatever we end up doing today, I am praying that I can be patient. And hear what God is saying to me. Then it will go well.

what? 911?

Does this look like a child capable of dialing "911"? Of all the mathematical combinations possible for an 11 month old child to dial, what are the chances that she would call "911"? And since I happen to know the protocal when a nine-one-one call is recieved, I knew the police were on the way. The man from the county call center called here to ask if we had an emergency, since they had gotten the call from here.....I had just taken the phone away from Camille the amazing active baby. I had heard her pressing buttons. I assured him that we were okay, it must have been the baby who was just playing with the phone....when I was talking to him, I know I sounded like I had done something wrong, because I was a bit shaken up. They take each call pretty seriously.....

My daughter Kathryn called 911 a few years back, Margaret told her to when they were playing....ha,, ha,,....the police sent someone out. A cop. Knocking at the door. At that moment, whoever was the toddler had just taken off all his clothes and dragged a chair over to the kitchen sink....then came the knock...I told the officer that my 8 year old daughter had done it....he asked to talk to her, and she was so upset and scared....he told her it wasn't funny at all. And he mentioned that their policy was to send the police out to check things out whenever they get that 911 call.....so, today I knew they were coming. And I started feeling like I had something to hide. Like they were going to search the house or something. Can they arrest you for a messy laundry room? Anyway, this time I was prepared......I put my hair up neatly, and changed out of my ridiculously short around the house skirt, brushed my teeth, changed Camille out of the half'snapped sleeper she was crawling around in, and got it picked up and vacuumed in here....and no one showed up. So, we decided to go out in the sunshine for a little walk.....

Sunny, but quite chilly.......

There is not much traffic on our road....but as we were walking along, I heard a car, and alerted Jon that we were going on to the grass, and lo and behold, it was the POLICE! Why did my heart start hammering, I hadn't done anything wrong. I swear I came off as guilty of something. He pulled over and asked me if I lived at the certain house number....and I said, yes, and pointed to innocent looking Camille in the stroller, in her pink fuzzy coat, and said, "She did it!" He was looking me over, probably for bruises or tears, and checking out the kids too. He said he just wanted to make sure everything was all right.....yeah, everything is fine except now I'm paranoid!

On the way home from our walk, I didn't even stop at the stone throwing creek, because I thought if one of the kids fell in and I had to call 911.....

We got home and I was kind of glad it happened.....when Camille made the call, I was sitting here with Jonathan and Charlotte Claire on either side of me watching car crashes on YouTube.....and now, the place is all cleaned up.....Camille and Charlotte Claire are in for their naps, Jon is watching channel 24, and I need to go do some LAUNDRY......ugh....

Anyway, the moral of this story is: Always keep your hair clean, and the house relatively picked up, because you never know when one of YOUR kids will call 911.....

an angel in walmart

Story # 1. Taking Jonathan and Sonja to the doctor for a rash they have had. This trip also included Kathryn Grace who was looking for a day off, and heard we were taking a trip out and about.....the dr. office is in a building with those nice big blue buttons that open the doors. Irresistable to children. Worth fighting about, to them. Even worth waiting until the doors close so they can have a turn. Then out to the rainy cold parking lot to the big messy van....

Story # 2. Somehow when I told the kids about their upcoming dr. visit, I said maybe we can go to McDonalds afterward. I don't know why I said that, it just came out. So of course I had to take them there. Hotwheels cars and mini-Barbie dolls.....so, I sprung for 3 happy meals. But I didn't use my credit card, I made an extra stop at the bank. How virtuous I am. ha. Charlotte Claire pooped at the Playplace.....so I had to trust Kathryn, 10, with Camille while I changed her diaper. Then, I really had to pee. Maybe just seeing the toilet, but I had to go so badly. I left Charlotte Claire, still in her stocking feet, sitting on the change table while I went quick. I couldn't stand the thought of her stocking feet on the bathroom floor, and I couldn't send her out with Kathryn who already had Camille. So I took aa chance that she would sit there like a good girl, and she did. Whew. If you've ever taken a group of small children to Mcdonalds Playplace, you know how much fun it is to tell them it's time to leave now....and then to actually gather them, shoe and coat them, and herd them out to the van....put away the kids, buckle them in, again, and put the stroller away..... in the rain.

Story # 3. WalMart!!! Prescriptions to fill. 30 minutes? How could it take 30 minutes? Okay, we'll go look at the fish. And yes, we will look at the toys, but we are not buying any. Just so you know. We were halfway through the toys, and Camille decided to poop. So we headed back to the back of the store bathroom, and Kathryn stayed outside the bathroom door with Charlotte Claire, who was buckled into the cart.. These are the times it is difficult to be a mom. I mean, I don't like leaving her there.....but at least it isn't near an exit where someone could steal them and drag them out the door. I gave her the lecture about staying right there, ect...Would it be better to bring Miss Charlotte Claire into the bathroom, yuck? The cart had merchandise in it, so I couldn't very well drag that in.....then I went in and changed a pretty bad diaper. I will spare you the details, but it wasn't a simple one. Anyway, we decided to look for some leggings for the little girls who wear skirts everyday to school. Jon spotted some big-boy pajama sleepers, and started in on how he has no pajamas....how he just needs those. He seems to reach a point where he just loses it in each shopping trip. We went on to pick up our prescriptions, which we had to wait for......with Jon fussing about various things all the while. Jon was really rude about something at the checkout, and after I finished paying, we were putting on coats, again, and I was telling him quietly that he shouldn't talk to me in that tone. I was a bit frazzled by now. Then, out of nowhere, a tall regal looking older woman appeared, I swear I did not see her approach, and said to me, "You don't look happy. Are you happy?"....I smiled at her, and said yes, I actually AM happy....and she went on her way. So.....yes, the kids need to learn things. They learn through trials, like we do.........but I was getting too impatient. Letting things get to me....just forgetting to have fun.....That lady was like a sunbeam, and I truly believe with all my heart that she was an angel.

All this time, Jon found a new thing to fuss about. He wanted his Walmart smiley-face stickers from me, that I had put in my pocket when he had to go pee. And he was demanding them from me. And I was telling him that sure, he could have them, as soon as he asked nicely.....MOM! He was getting very exasperated. Then I had a thought that it was not about winning, about holding out and making him humble himself, I just have to teach him respect. I sensed that if I pressed him too hard, I would make a big deal out of this thing, turn it into a giant battle. There are different ways to learn things, and though it was hard for me, as I got him into his car seat, I gave him the stickers and told him that he should say ,"Please, can I have them." As soon as he had them, he told me thank you, and he knows he should say please. Sometimes it is just too much for them to humble themselves like that.....by the time we got home, Jon was saying he was sorry for being bratty in the store again....theoretically, I probably shouldn't even bring him.....but reality: he loves going places, and is learning to deal with being overstimulated, or what ever it is that sets him off.....

Well, busy day or not, it is not over with yet, and here I sit. What the heck are we even having for dinner? They had the ace-in-the-hole pizzas last night.....(The Simpsons' hurricane ham...)

october

October has always been a strange month for me. 14 years ago my mother had her first heart attack in October. I'll never forget the phone call from my brother one early morning....of course when your brother calls you early in the morning, you know it's something bad. I remember driving home from visiting her in the hospital, and seeing all the Halloween decorations, particularly the fake grave stones, and skeletons. When the death of someone you love looms as a very real possibility, these things are just stomach-turning. I don't mind the trick-or-treat and dressing up aspect of Halloween, but no thank you to the gore......

We didn't celebrate trick or treating with the kids for several years. We have a wonderful Fall Feast each year at church. But somewhere along the line, we realized there was nothing wrong with the kids dressing up and going out for candy. I had assumed for years that it was wrong to ask people for candy. But now I see that most people, people who have their lights on and decorations up, WANT to give kids candy. I know my parents absolutely loved a chance to blesss the children, and they were blessed in return. They were the "good" house, that gave lots of good candy to each child, and my mom always talked to the kids and got a good kick out of their costumes. So, when we started taking the kids trick-or treating, we of course took them down to the nice suburban neighborhood my parents lived in. We live on a rural road, with houses far apart....I have been known to dress a little silly too, just to see the look on my Dad's face. One year, I dressed as a clown. My face looked so funny, I surprised myself when I looked in the mirror. That year, we stopped at Little Cesaers for some $5 pizzas....I pulled up to the curb to let a few of the older kids go in and pick it up. A cop (excuse me, a police officer) walked up to the van and asked me what I thought I was doing. Just getting pizza, is that okay with you? I don't know what posessed me to answer so rudely.....then I glanced in my rearwiew mirror with a shock! I had forgotten how ridiculous I looked!

Well, we went to their house year after year....even last year, after they were gone and the house was for sale...two of my brothers, and my sister, and their kids would gather there, and the kids would go out in groups....we would go with them for part of it, then the older ones would go farther, longer, to get more candy.....but last year, I was due for Camille, so I just stayed at my parents' house......

Anyway, this year? The house is sold, and I am pretty sure the new occupants wouldn't want 30 people sitting in their yard.....so we will just have to something different. I think I'll still take them to that neighborhood. It is just a bit sad.....I know everyone has to die someday, but I really miss them. They were only 69 and 70 when they died...

It is a rainy chilly morning, it almost looks like snow mixed in. It goes against everything in me to send the little girls out to the bus this morning. I didn't wake Sonja up. They were up late last night, and she just gets so worn out. She does very well in school, so if she misses a day here and there, she will be fine.

Abigail and I are leaving when she gets home from college this afternoon, to get a present for the baby shower we are going to. Then I want to take a quick run into the grocery store (living out here is tough in that respect, such a haul to the good stores) for some necessities. I am very excited about this outing. Very. I have to sort of prepare dinner, or at least have some suggestions, but they will do it with out me. What a break....the thing is, Joseph is 17, Aaron 15, Molly 14, Sam 13, Margaret 11, they should be able to watch and feed the younger ones...Daddy will be here by dinner time too, and he is totally fine with me going. So he will take over....yay, I am so excited. I love them dearly, but oh, walking out the door unencumbered once in a blue moon just makes me want to jump up and down....I will of course feel the ever-present guiltiness that accompanies leaving them, and I will miss them, and think every once and a while about what they are doing without me. And tomorrow I will give them extra hugs and kisses, and drill them about how their evening went.....but, ahhhh....it will be nice.

company for dinner

Here is Margaret's homemade chocolate/vanilla marble bundt cake, and one of the apple pies we made today.....Margaret got to stay home from school today. She got out the cookbook, and wanted to try something new. I was already peeling apples for the pies, and had to peel squash, and potatoes, and clean, and take care of the kids....and she wanted to bake something additional! So, I let her. She did just fine. And, it tasted delicious. Sometimes you just have to give in. Her and I tend to butt heads a bit, but we had a good day together.

Here are Sam and Joe relaxing after our guests left..... Emily, doing a bit of homework....

Here is Charlotte Claire with Martin, a friend of ours, and my niece's husband's brother....

Here is my niece's husband, Thomas, with Evelyn and Suzanne.....can you tell he came from a family of 13?

Susan is having a baby in December, my sister's second grandchild....this baby is being fought over already, among the aunties, and the great-aunt....and the gramma....

Marius, a friend, holds Camille, who isn't too sure about him....

Well, just in our family there were 15 for dinner tonight, as Ben and Emily had classes., and Mariel is still in Canada...then we had 4 guests, so we had to bring in the Little Tikes table for a few of the little ones. It was noisy. The kids were so excited to have company, they were bouncing off the walls. They stayed up extra late, and will no doubt be hard to drag out of bed in the morning, but it was so worth it!!!

chilly morning, quick post

I just want to encourage anyone out there -if you want to read a really encouraging article called, "Blessings Instead", go to http://www.brunstad.org/

Well, Miss Charlotte Claire is cuddled up with me, and I can't really write now. If you read the above mentioned article, let me know what you think. Thank you....

evening....

This is Sonja K. I don't know why we call her Sonja K., but we do. Her middle name is Kathleen, so that is probably partly why....anyway, she is funny. She somehow got in on my walk this afternoon. I am so000 stupid. I told her she could come along, but she had to walk fast, and not say she was tired, because I needed to go all the way down the road....okay, she said. And she meant it. I am totally out-energized by this six year old. She scooted right along. As we went up the big hill, which I usually struggle with by the time I get to the top, measuring my progress by how many gasping breaths I have to take...she asked me if I was tired, because she wasn't....and she chatted all the way up that hill. She outpaced me all the way, then when we got close to the house, we could hear the kids out on the trampoline, and she wanted to run back the rest of the way...I was like, "You can run?"......stupid me...... Camille Anaya is getting so big....she will be one year old on November 7th....

Aah, the t.v. remote!
She loves to walk around the furniture....

Charlotte Claire did not want to wear these tights to church today....but daddy put them on her anyway.... Camille was alarmed at her crying....

Yum, this Easter cottage that I bought for 90% off after Easter, and they finally talked me into letting them make, is good stuff....Margaret, Kathryn, and Evelyn....

They had a good time decorating it, and eating the decorations....

Here she is, ready to go....

Another busy day....Margaret and Kathryn helped me put away a few boxes of sandals, and sort through the shoes that are outgrown. Then we sorted through the sweaters and jackets. There are 10 hooks, so I gave one to 9 of the younger ones. Paul and I can keep ours in our room, and Camilles', too.....as can the older ones. I left one hook for random jackets, like if you pick one up and don't know who's it is...I often think that life would be easier if we had a mud room, but there's not much sense wishing .....

We also took care of the big pile of clothes on the couch. It is clean and empty, and makes the room look so nice. For how long, I ask?

While I was out walking, Abigail made dinner. We had Sam's favorite, Hamburger helper stroganoff, and mixed veges. For some reason, the kids just clean off their plates when I make it. Even Camille liked it. It's the only variety of Hamburger Helper I buy. And it was $1 a box.

Tomorrow we are having company for dinner. My niece, who is expecting her first baby in December, and her husband, and 3 other friends who are staying with them. I think I'll make chicken and gravy, and mashed potatoes. I also want to make some apple pies...ha. I wish I could clone myself, then I could just lay on the floor and play with Camille, and read stories to Charlotte Claire, and play cars with Jonathan, and make pies and clean the kitchen at the same time. I had Joseph sweep the floor really well tonight so I can mop tomorrow morning....what fun. I say that sarcastically, but I do really really love clean floors. I do not like stepping on Cheerios...and I hate sticky.

I am going to a baby shower on Tuesday night! A friend of ours is having her third. She has a little girl, and toddler boy, and is having another girl. She moved here from Norway when she only had the first, and didn't bring all her baby girls stuff. It should be really nice to see my friends.....and Paul is okay with having all the kids for the evening, even Camille. I explained that at 11 months old, she would NOT be fun at a shower. Too mobile. So, he gets to have some fun too...ha.

My sister is sick. She has chronic asthma, and her lungs are not very good when she's healthy, but now she has a cough....I hope she calls the doctor!

Well, I am tired. Weekends are exhausting. It doesn't help that Camille the sweet cuddly baby was up 3 times last night.....and last night was a short one, too. I didn't take much time off today....I don't know where the day went....I planned on a nice soak in the hot tub.....oh well....tomorrow is another day...