oh, september 11th!

I read the note from Jonathan's teacher to dress the kids in red, white, and blue today to celebrate our country. It seemed random to me. Then this morning I looked at the date, and realized that it is September 11th. I remember how shocking and horrifying that day was, back in 2001. I called my parents after my kids got on the bus for school, as usual. It was my daily ritual, (and I still miss it, but that number is no longer in service...). My mother gave the phone to my father, he told me to turn on the t.v., we were being attacked. I turned it on, and Margaret, who was 4 years old at the time, stood there with me, as I was too shocked to consider sheltering her. As we watched the events unfold, she kept saying over and over again, "What about the kids? Don't they care about the kids? Are there babies? Don't they care about the babies?"....That was an awful time for the people of New York City, and for our country. We heard the stories of the ones who were just at the top of one of the towers the day before, or the one who changed plans at the last minute. Terrorists have had their hearts so hardened, to actually believe they are doing good things by killing innocent people. Unfathomable.

I do not like to discuss politics, so all of that aside, we live in a great country. (a country they should stop ruining....giving away money we don't have, but that is getting into discussing politics).....I do think we should be thankful for our country. When Mirielle flew back from England (I still say they were stupid for rejecting such a wonderful girl), she sat on the plane over the Atlantic next to a doctor from I Taiwan, who couldn't say enough good about medicine and medical research in the U.S. He was visiting for the first time for a medical conference, and he was so excited and full of praise for our country. I think it would be a better place to live if the people who lived here started being more thankful for how good we have it instead of whining about what we don't have. (I don't even want to get into all the horror stories of how far behind some countries are on basic medical treatment...., no I will just change the subject...)

So yesterday we went to lunch with my sister, the birthday girl. It was very relaxing and pleasant and fun. She had two of her lovely daughters with her, Janet who is my Mirielle's age, and Becky, who is my Emily's age. Mirielle and I and Charlotte Claire and Camille went, too. The little girls were good, phew, so that helped make it pleasant. We then went to the dollar store. I got some boxes of granola bars, a few three-packs of socks (I think we should go for the world's record for unmatching socks, it is easier to buy new ones).....then Mirielle and I went to BJ's and bought $259 worth of candy for next week's soccer tournament.


I took the school kids out swimming in the pool, which was pretty chilly, but oh, it feels nice to move and exercise in there....then we went in the hot tub, which was set at 100 degrees. Lovely and relaxing, except I knew I had to get out and start dinner, it was youth meeting night. I put some hot dogs and turkery burgers on the grill, some onion rings in the oven, Mirielle cut up tomatoes and onion and pickles, Margaret prepared some green beans, Evelyn set the table and got a few pitchers of ice water....

After dinner clean up and getting clothes out for today and looking at folders and helping with homework and bedtime stories and a few showers, they were off to bed....except for Camille, who has been taking late naps....she stays up 'til like 10:30, being cute and cuddly and getting into things.

Today, the plan is to stay home. But we might go get some apples at this place that lets you fill a huge paper grocery bag for $7. But we might save that for tomorrow. We DO have to go gets several dozen ears of corn for activity club - they are doing Indian (also known as Native Americans) night at activity club. They are going to soak the corn with the husks on, then roast it in the oven. Mirielle is also making several pumpkin pies today, I told her I want a piece. So after school today, the hunt is on for finding cool Indian costumes. This is their first activity club after summer break ,so they are doing a party with all the age groups together. It is really amazing, this is run all by the youth, (they do run things by the older ones several times a year), but these older teens and younger twenties kids spend their Friday nights making special memories for the children. Abigail, Mirielle, and Aaron do this. All the other ones, down to Jonathan, are in the different groups. So Friday nights belong to Paul and I and Charlotte Claire and Camille....

Yeah, so blah, blah, blah....the house is just as messy this morning as it was yesterday morning, and the only thing I can do about it is get up out of this chair and clean it up, again. It is like the movie, "Groundhog Day", where the same thing happened every single day. I have tried nagging, reminding, scolding, chasing, yipping, yapping, pointing things out, making kids stop what they are doing and pick things up, but there still seems to be a certain messiness that survives here. Benjamin asked me the other day why I bother cleaning it all up everyday if it is just going to get messy again. Good question. Wait, because it would get really really bad if I didn't stay on top of it. So, even though my schedule seems "empty"....I have laundry, and hangers on the couch, and clothes on the couch, and piles of books to put away, and wait: a newspaper to read!

pancake morning...

Mirielle got up and made pancakes and bacon for the school kids this morning. It is only day three of the school year, but there has been a peaceful spirit in the morning. I will do what I can to keep that going.

Mirielle and Aaron want to do a series of short YouTube videos of our family....to show the contrast between what goes on here, and what they think people probably believe our family life is like. The will probably have a blog linked to this. I remember when we used to use our video camera all the time, and the kids would hook it up to the tv and we would be watching, and there I would be, chewing someone out about something....and I would think, "Do I sound like that? Do I LOOK like that?"....so this should be interesting. Oh, the perfect would be that every word is thought out and kind, and that is my heart's intention...but the reality....I'm working on it.....and the background mess....Mirielle says it is part of the fun...uh-oh.

We have a dear friend who has cancer. She is 82 and still as sharp as a whip, and so very kind. She is English, and her father was a railroad man who raised the family in India. She set sail for America in her early twenties, and was a nurse all her life in Oaklahoma, then moved to this area over twenty years ago. Her dear sister, Evelyn Joy, who lived with her for many many years, who my Evelyn is named after, passed away three years ago. Now Gwen is sick, and I know she is old, but.....it is so sad. She has total and complete faith and confidence in God, so she is at peace about it. She is in our church, and she has been SUCH a good example. She testifies at every meeting, she does not complain, she never backbites, on the contrary, she speaks of other in such a way that she lifts them up in your eyes. Sitting down and talking with Gwen, you forget in 5 seconds that she is so old. She is easy to talk to, and has fascinating stories to tell. I really want to spend some time with her soon....she is of course getting frail, and to hear her say in her quiet way, "The Lord has been so good to me..." Oh, what a contrast to that feeling-sorry-for-myself spirit.....

Just thinking about Gwen encourages me today. I want to think good thoughts about people and be thankful for what God sends my way. Because at the end of the day, it isn't whether I got my own way, but the way I took things, that matters. Oh, to be cleansed of the irritation and bitterness and stop the ranting and complaining dead in its tracks....so that our home and marriage can be peaceful and good....I read Obama's speech...and I refuse to discuss politics here, ha, but despite my initial misgivings, whoever wrote that speech did a darned good job. To take responsibility for one's own actions, despite the circumstances, that is wisdom. If each and every American were to do this, I can't even imagine how good it would be.

Our house is a mess today. The older ones and daddy left right after dinner, and I did the dishwasher and the pans...but the counter is picking up all the clutter, again. I hate clutter, and it seems to me that that counter looked fine and dandy yesterday. Now, it is home to a stack of clean bowls, a bottle of diet Pepsi, some Hershey syrup, two half-empty plates of watermelon, a bag of granola, Mirielle's camera, a half of banana, a drink pitcher, a jar of pckles, a tub of margarine....and on the living room floor, two sit-n-spins, a dolly stroller, several books, a towel used to mop up Mirielle's water last night that Rosie spilled, a laundry basket filled with clean unmatched socks, a few stray socks, a stuffed fish, a stuffed doggy, a school paper, the tissues Camille emptied last night.....a pair of froggy boots....it won't take long to whip it into shape again, just some quick picking up and sweeping.....but hopefully no one will drop in here for a while.....the washer is humming already, working on the ever present huge pile of bedding, which we never get to the bottom of. It is nice out, so I will dry as much outside as I can....anyway, as much as I would like to clean things up at night, I can't do it anymore. I am too tired from the day......and sometimes I tell the kids our new plan will be that they help clean up in the morning before school, and oh, the groans and protests! I don't think that would be very peaceful here....so, I spend my mornings cleaning up and sorting and picking up......

My little girls are up now this morning, so I have things to do and kids to play with....

second day of school

One thing I would like to clarify....the reason it is so hard to make up a dinner at the last minute when there is so many, is if you have say, one bag of fries, or one package of hot dogs, or one loaf of bread, (grilled cheese or French toast)you cannot serve it. It is not enough. Sometimes I have dreams that I have some of everything but not enough of anything......I try to have lots of pasta in the cupboard, and lots of cans and jars of sauce on hand. My freezer is pretty full, too....but try defrosting 6 pounds of chicken at five oclock....I do need to think ahead. Tonight, we had some extremely tender and juicy boneless pork chops, marinated in lemon pepper sauce, with thin green beans, buttered sourdough bread, and watermelon. I just can't let go of summer....

Mirielle and I went to the mall with Charlotte Claire and Camille. It seemed so strange to go with just the two little ones. Most things are way too expensive. We did find some clearance stuff in two stores, including two shirts and a skirt for me.....yay! Then we went to Aldi, which has good chocolate. That is primarily why we went. We did get some apples and juice and cheese and orange juice.....

I went swimming this afternoon with the school kids again....the water is still warm and clear and wonderful, I do not want it to end...I wouldn't mind if it just stayed like this. I enjoy exercising in the pool, as opposed to on land, where, in my opinion, it is torurous. Torture-ous.....is that even a word?

Tomorrow is my only sister's birthday!!!! I won't tell how old she is, but she is still and always will be a teenager at heart. She is so much fun. She has no sense of time, and is frequently late, (sorry Cheryl), but it is not her fault. She just always thinks she has more time than she does. She is the queen of bargains, I think she could count the things she bought full-price on one hand, or maybe one finger. She is first and foremost a good mommy to her seven girls, and now two son-in-laws and two grandchildren.....but she is a good friend, too. She has the gift of dropping the practical things for a fun outing, and never takes herself too seriously. She is kind and good and giving, and has a wicked sense of humor. Sometimes I can't even look at her because I know we're thinking the same thing. One time her and I had a laughing fit that was so seriously wrong...it was at a wedding, and I had to leave and go to the bathroom......this was only a few years ago....anyway, tomorrow is her birthday, and I am hoping to get together with her somehow...lunch maybe....

Great, we are having a clothing crisis. Kathryn is at THAT age....where nothing fits, nothing is comfortable for school. She is trying things on....I hope her sisters will help her and let her try their stuff on...there is nothing like going out the door in something you just don't feel right in.....

I had a crazy evening....Paul and all of the older kids went to cleaning (we clean our meeting hall as part of the rental agreement)....I was here making lunches for tomorrow, getting out clothes for tomorrow, doing the dishwasher, washing the pans, giving Suzanne a shower, helping Sonja with her math homework, and cleaning up the pee mess from Charlotte Claire...she missed the toilet. And during this, I realized that I no longer have a nursing baby to fit into it all. For years and years, I always had a baby...one would grow up and another would arrive....I never took it for granted....but I miss it. Even though it is easier now on nights like tonight, I would still take a baby any day....crazy or not...

Camille needs to go to bed....I am tired, too. I need to get into bed earlier tonight.

off to school they went...

And here I am...and I am a bit sad about it still. But they came home yesterday so happy, at least the younger ones. Jon got off the bus saying how much he loves school. That does make it easier on me. I am hoping the two little girls here get used to not having all their siblings and playmates during the day. I need to do more with them so they don't get into so much. I also need to get up earlier, to make some breakfast for the older kids. I have learned alot about myself through the years, and I wish I could go back and do the mornings over again. All the years with the waking babies and the tired mommy.....I see more and more how I can just shut up and ignore things so it can be more peaceful. I am more conscious to do that now, things that need discussing can wait. I also find the older kids are very thankful if I am making them plates of raisin toast or bagels. Five of them have to get out the door at 7:30, plus Abigail and Paul and Ben to work a bit before that. So they have to share the bathrooms.....they seem to work it out okay, but there is always someone who thinks it is a good idea to take a shower when the others need to brush their teeth.....but that was usually Joseph, and he is not here right now......

So they seemed to like school. I went around the room last evening and asked each one what they liked and what they hated about school. Suzanne was tired, and stubborn, and said she hated everything and loved nothing. It makes me laugh just to think of her, curled up in the chair in Gramma's nightgown, all grumpy. Then she did her paper bag project, where she had to find five things that describe her and put them in a lunch bag, which she did happily. I think she just has to adjust to the new teacher (who sat on her stool and talked and talked and talked, according to Suzanne)...and make new friends. She has no one from last year in her class. I think she is disapointed that one little girl isn't in her class, a girl named Hannah, who has special needs. Suzanne likes nurturing, she takes over with the younger ones here sometimes, and she really liked being good to Hannah.

When they got home yesterday, I took them out into the pool and hot tub and talked to them about their day, until it was time to put dinner on the table. I had put beef in the crockpot in the morning, so it was simple to cook up some green beans, and have barbequed beef. I need to do that more often, it certainly beats that horrible five-o'clock-what-the-heck-are-we-having syndrome that I am prone to. Which wasn't so bad back when there were 6 or 8 or 10 of us. But last night, there were 16 home for dinner.

Plans for today: to the store again. We are running out of everything already. I still don't have it through my skull how many people live here, I guess. Two bunches of bananas seems like alot, but.....anyways, we need apples and bananas and popcorn (the kernals)(I made them some last night while we talked about school).....Mirielle and I are looking forward to going out and about today. It just seemed so empty and lonely yesterday. I am not excited for Mirielle to get a job or go back to school.....(honestly, I am not taking it for granted that she is here, I was so prepared to miss her for so long, and here she is everyday.....she is not certain what to do next, but since she is broke, she is looking for work....)

I am not used to getting up so early, I stayed up way too late last night, and then the dog was barking at the cat....and Camille woke up once....today, I might just try for a little nap...ooh, it sounds yummy.....

I survived the first day of school....

And so did they.. the first trip kids, Samuel, 8th grade, Aaron, 11th grade, Mali, 10th grade, and in the front, Kathryn 6th grade, and Margaret, 7th grade...they didn't love getting off the bus and having me take their picture, but...they survived. These two sweet little girls in their froggy boots were hopping around our yard today....

Hey Joseph over in Norway: Rosie can shake! She does it every time now! (notice how she is in like all the pictures? she thinks she is a people)
Charlotte Claire and Camille with Rosie-pup.

I DO like those froggy boots.

And finally, bedtime for Camille....she looks so sweet and cuddly in her new-to-her pajamas from the Salvation Army store...I washed them, and they were warm and smelled good....her big brothers did not want me to put her to bed yet, and it was almost eleven...don't get me wrong, I don't count the hours 'til bedtime...but today, I was okay with saying goodnight. She had four showers today. FOUR! Two were for pooping and taking off her own diaper and making a nice mess of it. One was for the cinnamon and sugar dip mommy so nicely (and stupidly)gave them for their apple slices...she was pretty sticky. Then one for the packet of sugar free drink mix Charlotte Claire dumped on her head. Why do they do these things? I told Charlotte Claire not to make such messes anymore, and she said she wouldn't. Hmm. I don't totally believe her, but I do think she will try not to. Oh, and during one of the showers, Charlotte Claire poured body wash over Camille's head, and it went in her eyes...she just screamed....I think that made Charlotte Claire feel bad, which is okay. So Jon liked school. He said the teacher was nice, and Davianna fell asleep at rest time, and two girls didn't bring their lunches, and he played with Toby on the playground, and a girl kept kicking him at lunch. Okay. I am especially glad he is a talker....he filled me in pretty good...as opposed to those kids who go to school, and finally walk in the door, and I bug them about what they did, and they just say, "nothing"....okay, you went to school all day and did NOTHING?

Well, I am absolutely falling asleep here....long day...tomorrow Mirielle and I want to go someplace with the little girls....someplace where Camille won't need four showers......

how could one be happy about this?

Oh, Jonathan is certainly cute today....his first day of school. His big sisters were so sweet to him this morning. Sonja is next to him wearing her new school shirt that I got for her yesterday, TJMaxx, 50 cents. Evelyn, 4th grade, Suzanne 3rd grade, Sonja second grade, and Jonathan kindergarten. (I can't help but think Robert would have been in first grade).....(but then we wouldn't have Jon...so I can't even think about it...)(but it does come to mind) Anyway, they are sweet and happy, and mommy had to wait 'til they got on the bus to cry....

Rosie was all excited too, she knew someting was going on....she wanted to get the kids all dirty. I didn't get a picture of the older kids this morning, I forgot. We did have a very encouraging discussion before they left though. I reminded them that this is just part of our journey through life, that school is just another trial, and to remember to fight against those spirits of feeling like they don't belong, and the feelings of wanting to be something. I started to sing them a church song that goes something like, "We are not of the earth, no our home is above...." Sam immediately mocked me, (I sing terribly), but Aaron (bless his heart) said, "You guys, she's right." That melted me and made me want to jump up and down.....just think to head off to high school with the right attitude....to know that it is Him you serve in the midst of everything. That is worth all the money in the world, and has made me a very happy mommy this morning. Despite my sadness of seeing them all go.....

After they all got on the bus, I sat down comfortably with my strawberry mini-bagel and coffee, and started to upload my pictures.....then Camille started yelling, "Mommy, Daddy, Sonja!" over and over....I ignored her for a bit, I am ashamed to admit.....during the summer, the kids would fight over who went and got her out of her little green bed....anyway, I learned my lesson: as soon as I started down the hall, I smelled it....I opened the door, and was greeted with, "Ah poops!", which in Camille-language means, "I pooped!".....and removed the diaper....oh joy....a shower for her, and a load of laundry for me. Now Charlotte Claire is up too and they are rattling around like two peas in a pod....Mirielle is also home, but she hasn't made her presence known yet this morning. Abigail went to work, first day!

Okay, I gave them breakfast, and cleaned up the hand sanitizer that Charlotte Claire thought would be fun to decorate herself with....now Camille came out of their room covered in lemonade powder...where do they come up with these fun ideas? I think I am realizing that having a two year old and a three year old is not going as easy as I thought. Sad thing is that if I hadn't had that miscarriage, I would be having a baby in a month or two....wah. I don't dwell on it, but it does come to mind....

Charlotte Claire says daddy is nice because he "gurned "on her light last night, 'cause she couldn't sleep....so she feel asleep with her light on....she also says she is going to "gool" next year with her monster backpack, and she won't be gone for just an hour, but "GIX" hours. (6, that is).......

Rosie almost got on the bus with the first trip kids today, Aaron pushed her back...I was calling her, but she only listens when she feels like it. Fortunately, she usually feels like it.

She is barking right now at someone visiting the neighbors...she requires so much attention....I better go get her....

ice cream with daddy....

I have been promising the kids we would do something special this weekend. The older kids are all gone. What we decided on was a visit to Paul's parents, a few towns over, then the playground, which is at the school next to their house. Paul stayed and visited with his parents while I followed the kids over to the playground with Rosie. The vet said Rosie needs more socialization, to take her more places...she pooped at the playground. Very social of her. I had to bring her back to Gramma's so I could get the things to pick up the mess. On the way, a pickup truck pulled up and the driver pointed to a sign on the playground fence that said, "No Dogs"....he asked me if I saw the sign. I told him that I just noticed it. Ha. He was not even smiling, let alone laughing. Thankfully I stopped my big mouth from saying that she had just pooped and I was heading over to get some wipes and a bag to pick it up....he probably would have made a citizen's arrest.....after this fun, we went out for ice cream. Camille was pretty excited about it. (we had dinner while she was still napping, then woke her and took her with just her bottle, so she was hungry. Is ice cream for dinner okay?) (She ate it ALL).... Paul thought his ice cream was too big, so he gave the rest to Rosie, who waited in the big van for us. (I did not want to clean up poop at the ice cream place..)..I think Paul was just being nice. He calls Rosie, "Your dog", to me, but he secretly loves her too.

Our seven youngest. Camille, Kathryn, Charlotte Claire, Sonja, Jonathan, (poor Jonny, with all those girls!) then Suzanne and Evelyn on the table...

Camille has learned how to tell secrets in my ear, and I tell her secrets back...it is so sweet. She tells me she loves me. She is so funny.

We had peanut butter and fluff sandwiches for lunch today. She ate hers all up....then wanted more, and just ate the middle good stuff out....

Her sisters gave her a mini lollipop....

And they made her a nice big crown....

Charlotte Claire....

Suzanne with her crown...







Kathryn and Camille....

Camille made up for having no dinner tonight, she did not go to bed hungry. Mirielle made kettle corn, and stove top popcorn. Plus Camille found the crackers, and had some juice. Not the most nutritious diet tonight, but I think she'll be okay.

The older kids got home from the conference, and brought home a Dutch girl who lives in New Mexico. Thankfully we had cleaned up today and yesterday....we still scrambled to pick up odds and ends because we had like half hour notice. The older kids won't believe it, but it is not just the little ones who make messes. Maybe because when it is just the younger ones, we all eat each meal all together, so there is not the all day meal making going on. But whatever the reason, the house stayed cleaner this weekend. And it seemed easy to make meals for only the nine of us...(eight this afternoon, as Camille was sleeping).....well, we did cheat, too. For dinner we had popcorn chicken and some very nice veges, green and yellow beans with carrots....microwaved. It was simple and not too terribly unhealthy. Sonja ate exactly 4 beans, and it almost killed her. She dramatizes it so much, Paul just finally told her if she didn't eat them, she couldn't have icecream...so I was just rooting for her to eat them....I wouldn't even want to go if she couldn't get some...she ate them...Paul said that it would have been harder for him than it was for her if she didn't get ice cream...I think he regretted saying it, and was pretty glad that she was a trooper about it and ate the veges.

Last night, we cheated and Paul brought home the $5.99 Little Cesaers pizzas, only three of them...there was enough left for the girls to have a piece for breakfast. They LOVE pizza for breakfast.

Blah blah blah, as my father used to say. I am tired and need to go to bed. We tried to watch a movie tonight, but it was just bad bad bad. It was about King Henry the 8th, and his quest to get rid of wife number one, to replace her with the sister of his old mistress....oh, garbage. For anulling his first marriage, he alienated the Catholic church and joined the Protestants....I mean, how did God even fit in to all this adultery, lies, and betrayal? We couldn't watch it....it was rated pg 13, but it was bad bad bad. We finally agreed to take the movie out and just talk and eat Starburst. That was way better. I am tired, and rambling, so goodnight.....