don't wish your life away....

This is now. This is life. Not tomorrow, not next year. Only today. Fat, messy house, things to do...this is my life. Am I making the most of it? Grabbing those moments? Hugging those little girls, engaging them in conversation, praising the older kids and talking to them instead of just saying, "you left your mug on the counter with the tea bag in it AGAIN...."?

I got up early this morning even though Sam got in all of his 30 hours of work already this week and didn't need a ride. I heard Suri whining, so I got up and took her outside. Then I sat on the floor with kittens for a while, what joy! They are just so stupid and sweet. Suri is afraid of them. She would come up to me on one side and let me pet her, then tentatively sniff a kitten, then back away. I think it is because Mama Kitty has hissed at her a few times. Mama does not want the kittens in the kids' room though, she brings them back into the living room by the scruffs of their necks. She is a social kitty, and wants these kittens in here. Do I mind? ha. I am having the time of my life. But sadly, they have to be given away in a few weeks. I am sad because I know I am finally growing up...because I know we don't need to keep one.

So this morning I am happy and thankful. There are so many things to be thankful for!!!!

1. Food. The kids get up and wander into the kitchen. There is cereal, bread for toast, bananas, orange juice, milk, oatmeal. That is nothing to take for granted.

2. Charlotte Claire and Camille. They have been awake in their room for a while, but they play in there together, I can hear them laughing. They are so lucky to have each other!

3. My husband. We aren't always on the same wavelenghth, and I sometimes think he doesn't appreciate me enough, sniff sniff, but. I love him more and more, and he loves me. We still have that spark, and I must say it has gotten better and better, and that is all I am gonna say about that.

4. God. Yes, this one should come first, because from Him all blessings come. I am thankful that He has had mercy on me, and helps me straighten out my thoughts. "We are hard pressed on ever side but not crushed, perplexed but not in despair," (2 Corinthians 4) Seriously, our thoughts are our rudder, steering us, and we need to watch over them carefully. It is okay to be tempted to return evil for evil, but it is never okay to actually give in and do it. I find that when I feel hurt or offended, it is in my nature to strike back....and I do not want to do that.

5. My messy home. I wish it weren't messy. I wish it were organized. But, I am thankful for it. For the fun we have here, and the warmth.

6. Down time. I love and appreciate when I can sit here in my comfy chair with my coffee and put my feetsies up. Never underestimate the value of putting those up for a bit. A nurse commented recently that it was amazing that I don't have vericlose veins after having so many pregnancies, and I said it was because I put my feet up too often.

7. Our big yard. We only have two and a half acres, but the kids can run around...we drive by this place in the small city where several families share a small "yard" - mostly paved, between two buildings...there is a small kiddie pool, some tables and umbrellas, and litle bikes...very sad and rather depressing. It makes me feel almost guilty that we have so much grass, and all these trees to climb....

8. My walks. I went on two yesterday. My second one was after dinner, I felt antsy so I put on my sneakers and headed for the hills. I sorted out those thoughts and determined not to have any snacks in the evening, which didn't work because I had a handful of chocolate chips later. But I SO enjoy the mild weather and those walks.

9. Jonny. He is such good company. He charges my phone and my Nook for me, he uses my phone to text his sisters, he answers my texts for me sometimes, he doesn't ask for things in the store anymore, he talks to me about important things like what cars would make good police cars (he pointed out that using gas-guzzlers could be dangerous, because what if a cop had several criminals to chase and ran out of gas?). Anyway, Jonathan is such a good boy.

10. My six teenagers. They know way more than I do. They ever need new sneakers, or have only "one good shirt". They need hair conditioner and they need face wash. When I tell them what they REALLY need, and what I lived without, they say, "In the seventies....", or "back in the dinosaur age...". But they really are good kids, and appreciate things.

11. Good deals. Today, we are going on an adventure! J.C.Penney has a special for the month of August in all their hair salons - free haircuts for school kids up to sixth grade! I will give the stylist a tip, of course, but free! Camille, Char, and Jon are going in this afternoon. Mirielle took Sonja last week. Now, I have never even had my hair cut anywhere, ever, so this is, to me, an extravagance. The princesses are really excited about it. Don't get used to it, girls.

12. Summer sunshine. There is nothing like it. We have almost set a record here this summer, 23 days of 90+degree days so far, and this weekend: sunny skies, warmth into the high eighties or low nineties.

13. My son Benjamin, and his strong faith in God. I honestly don't know what would have happened to him without his faith. Imagine being over in Afghanistan, your major lifeline and hope for the future being getting off that plane to your beautiful wife, then finding out that she has had a change of heart, THEN finding out there is someone else. Please continue to pray for Benjamin, that he holds on to his faith and doesn't give in to despair.

14. My blog. I love writing here. I don't seem to run out of things to say.