all sunshine and roses....

Life is good. Paul brought me these flowers on Friday, aren't they pretty? Married for 30 years, and I still get flowers. Based on that alone, I should never have anything to complain about ever.

An yet...I fine a zillion things...

Mud. Yesterday, it was a fine day for playing outside, my kids were in hog heaven, it was finally a spring day. Never mind that it was still pretty cold at 43 degrees, they were loving it. They would come in and get something they just had to have out there, bringing in a little mud. The dogs were the worst, they slogged through that creek, came in with not just muddy paws, but muddy tummies and legs and noses...good thing I had nothing important to do and was available to mop up the mud repeatedly, wipe down the dogs...I would get them all cleaned off, then someone would go out the door and invite them to go too, they would jump up and wag and follow them, and I would just about scream. Nope, nothing to complain about.

Camille slipped in the mud. Pants, sweatshirt, sneakers, a mess. She simply changed her clothes and went right back out.

It has been a long winter for them.

Camille broke her arm not too long ago, and has a gym excuse until the end of May. That means she can't play in gym class, but also that when the class goes outside for recess, she is only allowed to sit on the bench, no running or swinging or playing at all. Now, I don't know about you, but I think that is mean. I know, I know, liability and all of that. But poor Camille. Today is sunny, and is supposed to get into the fifties, so that means her class will probably be going outside for playtime at the end of the day. So I am picking them up early, both her and Charlotte Claire. They can come home and play out in their playhouses, and swing on the swingset, and NOT climb any trees....

First World Probs: without getting into the details, money is a little tight right now. And, we are going on a trip to Georgia in June. Paul and I also had planned a trip to Gettysburg for a weekend, one of these weekends....for our 30th. And, I wanted to go see Benjamin and his wife and baby out in Washington state, at the end of the month, with Emily. Paul and I decided that we can't do all three things, so I had to decide...and I chose the trip to see my granddaughter. No weekend away with Paul. The trip to Georgia...we are still doing that. We have to go see Sam!

Anyway, if Emily gets one day off that she is scheduled to work, we will be going out to visit Ben at the end of the month.

But my point was that I felt so much turmoil about making a decision, and the poor-me, can't do everything. In the big picture, of course, it is absolutely ridiculous. We have food and shelter and our family and friends and and and...

I am hoping and praying that Em gets that day off though. I miss spending time with Ben and Ashley, and I just love that little Anya, I want to know her though. I want to connect with her, to hold her, see her smile, not just on facebook.

And perhaps Paul and I can still get away at another point, although I have been really looking forward to it...not getting away from the kids to get away from the kids, but to be able to be enjoy each other without figuring out rides and problems and arguments and who has to be where when.

I am finally more psyched to get into better shape. Oh, I have never, in the last three years anyway, given up on it althgether, but honestly, that winter funk of just not feeling it is fading. The key, I think, is Just Doing It, to borrow a golden phrase from Nike. It doesn't matter if I feel like it or not, I just exercise. It doesn't matter if I want a cookie, I just don't eat it. Now, this does not apply to that wonderful cinnamon raisin toast I shoveled in yesterday morning, of course.:), there are exceptions every once in a while. I did get right back up again yesterday, and it was a good day overall.