And, that's all the pictures blogger will let me post today...no idea why.
This fine morning, I had to skip the swim class and take Miss Cam to an appointment. We then went to Aldi, since we were in town, then visited baby Bridget...oh, and her parents:). We had to stop at the lab for Cam to get her bloodwork done, and we did so with our pumpkin spice iced coffees...mine had only one pump, so it wasn't very sugary, but oh so good.
I stopped to visit Miss Kathryn for a few minutes, got a big hug from Rhys, and listened to some interesting facts about Morray lizards? shh, I wasn't totally listening...oops, from Achilles.
Home...ahh, home. I cleaned the guestroom, washed some bedding, vacuumed, and here I sit.
I'm doing okay, but I am partly tortured. When someone you care about takes their life (and I'm sorry if anyone considers this something that shouldn't be talked about!), it hurts so many people. We wonder what we missed. We think of the texts we skimmed over and didn't reply to. It breaks my heart. I am asking, oh no, were you so lonely and we didn't realize? Felt hopeless? Overwhelmed? I just want to go back in time, to last week, and intervene. To be fair, one of the guys in class did ask him that day if he was all right, because he sensed he was off, but he of course was fine.
I will truly miss Rich. He was quite a bit older, and was a veteran, a courier in the Army, and had so many stories of his adventures. He had a 76 MonteCarlo, and so did I...(I think that was the year I had...my mother in law surprised me with it for my birthday in 1989...just parked it in my driveway all covered with bows and ribbons.). He took over running the class when his second wife passed away, the first died of cancer too. So he had really been through it. He was an EMT in his younger years and sometimes he told of the things he had attended to, one would have nightmares. He had happy experiences too, once he delivered a baby on a call, and then years later at the cutlery plant he was working at, met a young lady named Richaline..sure enough, he had delivered her and her mama had named her after the nice EMT:)
For some years now, swim class and going out to brekky once a month, you get to know someone. Maybe you just chat and catch up, and take that person for granted. How are you to know that it will come to a sudden and screeching halt, so tragically and sad?
It is a lot to process.
Anyway. I have things to do, why does my chair have to be so comfy? I love summertime. Today the windows are open (the AC is off), and the curtains billow a bit in the breeze, and I have bare feet. It's quiet in here, the girls are at work, and Paul is working. Suzanne is coming over tomorrow, and Evelyn and Nate and baby Bridget are coming over later in the afternoon. (I'm thinking beach?). We are very lucky to live half hour from a nice sandy Lake Ontario beach...
Ah well...you all enjoy this summertime afternoon!
8 comments:
I'm so sorry that you lost your swim teacher and friend. My grandpa committed suicide. It is hard to fathom how anyone can get that low. Sending a hug. One of our Winn Dixies is now a BIG Aldi.. I haven't visited it yet, but need to check it out one of these days. Enjoy your family!! xo
Suicide is horrid, it hurts those left behind so very much.
I just wanted to say that, having had experience with a couple of family members who did what Rich did...there's really nothing you could have done. We learned that people who are really serious about it don't talk about it (people who threaten it usually don't go through with it, they do it to get attention or to manipulate the people around them). The ones who are really resolved to do it will just do it. My BIL did it three years ago and his kids (my niece and nephew) will probably never get over the idea that they should have known he was so upset, but he never gave a clue. I know it leaves more questions than it answers, but the biggest question is always "Why didn't I know?" and the reason you didn't know is because they didn't want you to know because they didn't want to be talked out of it. I hope this helps a little.
How lovely to see photos of your older children.
It's 2 weeks today until Pumpkin Spice arrives back here in England. hehehe
I think things like suicide should be talked about. Maybe if it was talked about more less people would do it. Sending love and hugs.
I'm sorry about your grandpa. Oh, you will love the big Aldi! If you like charcuterie boards, cheeses and salami, it's SO much cheaper!
It is. "Regular" death is hard enough, but suicide just leaves the survivors in shock.
I'm really sorry for your niece and nephew. I know people usually don't give a clue, but we beat ourselves up in our grief. Thank you so much for reaching out.
Two more weeks! :). I agree it should be talked about. My brother took his life many years ago, and it's a really hard thing to discuss. Thank you for your kind words...:)
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