the diary of my days....

These little electrodes are attractive, eh? I'm glad it's not summertime, I look like a science experiment, but at least when I leave the house I can cover them up.

And leaving the house is what I do best. This fine winter morning, 13 degrees (-10.5c), with widespread snow in the forecast, I am taking kids to dentist appointments. Since it is winter and driving in snow isn't my favorite, we are staying in the small city until the afternoon gymnastics class. I am not at loss for what we should do, because I need new slippers. Evelyn is so kind to let me wear hers while she is at school, but I need some. (My old ones disappeared, and I do suspect Little Miss Sunshine. Camille found her Totoro slipper in the yard...several different times).

So Walmart for new slippers. And a few new towels. Where do THOSE go? With the odd socks, probably.

And: We are going to Florida! Now, to those of you who maybe live there, or go there every year come heck or high water, it's no biggie. But I never ever went there while growing up, it's only been the last few years that we have gone, and it is HUGE. I don't like driving, but I'll do it, but I do love seeing new places, and the adventure of road trips. I like packing, and we get to see Grandma!!! These last few years we have just gotten along so peachily, and I really enjoy our time together. Sonja is trying to decide whether to miss a week of Real School to go with us, it's her choice, after all, it's her who has to make up work or get low grades. I hope she decides to go though! She's almost fifteen, the youngest of the five-girls-in-a-row, who are now 20, 18, 17, 15, and 14...(Suzanne will turn 16, then Sonja will turn 15 a few months later))...and she is a teenager among teenagers at home...but when she is with the younger kids, she seems to lighten up and have a really good time...she gets to be the oldest, instead of ha, #13! Margaret and Adrian are going with us too, which will be fun. Adrian has never been to Florida.

So I have to write down everything I do while wearing this heart monitor. I should have jotted down the exact time I found out we were actually able to make the Florida trip, as I'm sure my heart started going faster.

And this morning, while I cleaned up dog pee by the door (Miss Sunny doesn't always make it until morning, but at least she has chosen a spot near the door...:( ), I decided to just write, "cleaning up..."



Sunny IS cute.


Miss Char thought she would be cute in her sweatshirt. She kept it on for a few hours, didn't care.



Blogging is an interesting endeavor. It's soothing to me, it relaxes me to sit and write. I rarely proofread, I just write, and hit the Publish button. I don't blog to be braggy, but honestly, I do see my blessings more clearly when I write.

My dogs for example, look adorbs in pictures. In real life, they are even cuter. Suri is a snuggly cuddler, she loves being pet and hugged. The kids can do anything they want, and she doesn't care at all. Duke is chill, old and laid back, but when you even look at him, he thumps his tail. It's like he's old...can't run and play anymore, and all that's left is goodness. (sometimes I think it would be better if he just got mean and cranky...). And Sunny...she's always looking for a chance to devour a platter of cookies. Yesterday, I made those oatmeal chocolate chip cookies with Jonathan (and did not eat even one bite!), and Sunny ...she didn't jump up, but if we had left cookies within easy reach and left the room, she would have. She got a block of cheese the other day. She has calmed down a lot though, and is a sweet dog.

Have I mentioned how much travelling Paul is going to be doing? India for two weeks, home for a week, then Ireland for two weeks? blah. The only good thing, besides the fact that he actually has a job, is the frequent flier miles he will accumulate. We are thinking maybe...just maybe, a trip out to Seattle to visit Ben and Ashley and little Anya...:), if he gets lots of reward miles.

Okay...yesterday the nice man came to fix the furnace. He said it's days are numbered, too many things need replacing, it's 25 years old, and we just plain need a new one before next winter, but hopefully it will last a while. Well. This morning I woke up to brrrr. Then Paul called me and confirmed...it's not working. That's why it's so cold in here, duh! It did click on and run yesterday after Mr. D. came but then stopped again. So Paul is trying to figure out what to do...if we have it replaced now, it will take days to get it all lined up and installed, ect, and it's cold out! So he's opting to try and get the one part that he suspects is the fault...and see what happens...never a dull moment, I tell you. With money, it's like you put the paycheck into a colander, and watch it seep out the holes. We have enough of what we need, which I am very thankful for, but it's always something...:)

And...I have sat here for the longest possible time before I have to hurry and wake the kids and get them out the door....Jon always wonders why I don't start getting ready earlier...there is just no answer, Jon. No answer.

when it rains....

I SHOULD say, when it snows it blizzards, but that isn't really the case either. This morning we woke up to a snowglobe world, tree branches decorated, and yard sparkling. I drove to the small city for an appointment, and the roads weren't too bad. The plow hadn't been down the southbound lane, which I was driving in, but I managed. My appointment was at the cardiologist, where they outfitted me with a halter monitor. You won't even know it's there, they said. Just do your normal activities, they said. Um, they don't know who they're dealing with, I am Miss Princess And The Pea, and I DO know it's there. And the fun part is that I get to log all my relevant activities. If I unload groceries, write it down. If I walk the dog, write it down. Paul better know this means he is totally staying on his side of the bed, because I am NOT WRITING THAT DOWN.

Anyway. This blog being p.g. and all, that's enough of that.

Our furnace stopped working. It's 22 degrees out, and yay for the little fake fireplace. The furnace man is coming today, which means I am going to sit here for the longest possible time, then get up and panic clean. Of course I clean for the furnace man! The downstairs hallway needs vacuuming anyway. And I didn't sweep the floor this morning before leaving the house, which would be fine if we didn't have three slobby dogs. Do you know what stuffed animal guts look like? Pieces of white fluffy stuff, and little pellets, scattered all over the living room. The tuna fish can that Sunny stole from the counter. The empty dog food bag, which I let Sunny have after I emptied the food into the locking bin...I let her have it for a while because she thought there must be something in something that smells so good, she put her whole head in it and ran forward, trying to get whatever smelled so good. It was too funny to take it away from her. And now it's in the living room. Real classy.

Anyway, I am going to do a nice quick clean up before the furnace guy gets here.

And, the check engine light is on in the minivan again. The mechanic recommended using high octane fuel to see if it would clean up the catalytic converter. But it's stressful to drive with that little orange light on.

Tomorrow, dentist...then gymnastics. Wednesday, the breast cancer center for the tiny little lump. Friday, the stress test at the cardiologist. Then, I hope I am done for a while. I am pretty sure all our pre-tax insurance dollars will be all used up...

Tomorrow is my sister's surgery, she is having a double mastectomy done. Pray for her, she has an excellent attitude, but God hears those prayers, and many times through the years miracles have happened. My sister says that she doesn't want to feel sorry for herself, nor does she want to live a life in bondage to anxiety. So she is fighting against those things. It is a very real struggle, to lose a part of yourself, and my prayers for her are that she can be honest that it's challenging, then come to peace with it. And of course, that the cancer is only in that lump, and is gone forever!

The girls are playing with playdough. They dug out the gingerbread playdough I made last year, and have this really cool set I got on clearance, a baking set with cupcake holders. They are setting up a pretty bakery. Jonathan is reading, "The Lord Of Rings". So we need to get some school done today too.

I went to the grocery store after my appointment, because we really needed dog food. Suri is on low calorie food, so I had to get two 20 pound bags. We needed kitty litter, and paper towels, and toilet paper. My cart was almost full. I also got burger and cheese and veggies and yogurt and bacon and chips. Some people hate shopping, but I am not one of them. I like going by myself sometimes. Today, I bought chips because they were buy two, get three free, tortilla chips (I LOVE the lime ones!) and regular potato chips. They were 4.29 a bag, then there was a coupon that if you bought two bags of chips, you got a jar of salsa or cheese sauce for free. The sauce was on sale for $3.50, but they took $3.99 off with the coupon. So for a little more than eight dollars, five bags of chips and a jar of cheese sauce. I know not so healthy, not for me anyway. But they have snacks for lunches, and supplies for taco night.

Our overnight-at-the-hotel night was fantastic. It's good to laugh your head off once in a while, and we certainly did that. It's also important to know you aren't alone in your struggles, and to be able to talk with friends who aren't going to judge you. We ate too much junk, drank too much junk, and went in the heated pool, which felt great because some of us had worked at the basketball game earlier in the day, and eeks, it was tiring.

It's always good to get back home after an overnight, even when you walk in and the house is freezing and smells like fuel oil...Paul tried to fix it himself before calling someone, of course.

Jonathan suggested a batch of oatmeal chocolate chip coookies...I am inclining to think that's an ace of an idea, if only I can keep them out of my mouth. But first, panic cleaning!

afterthoughts and regrets...

I don't really believe in being politically correct, but I also don't like to trample anyone's feelings. And I don't want to be judgmental and critical. So I thought about what I wrote yesterday, and it may be true, but it doesn't mean that if anyone else lives their lives in any other way, I don't like them. I do love people, and sometimes it's clear that better choices would bring them more peace, but who am I?

This fine morning, I don't have much time to sit here and ruminate on the world's problems. I have a doctor's appointment. I have to do the stress test at the cardiologist. (it would be a true stress test if they played an individually tailored video, for me it would be the dogs fighting and raising holy "h" in the living room while I try to blog with a hot cup of coffee, the floors not yet swept, and the dryer buzzing, while kids asked me important questions, like, "are iceburgs made of salt water?")

I have this appointment because of that lovely trip to emergency room last fall, after taking the dreaded Ciprofloxin. My pounding heart! Skipping beats! They kept me overnight, then of course made me swear in blood that I would follow up with a cardio dr. Naturally, I decided I didn't need to...but at my nice little check-up with my nurse practitioner...she saw the hospital notes, and said I really need to do that. My daughter, Nurse Mirielle, already admonished me that I don't want to be labelled, "Non-compliant." ha. It's actually the most suitable title ever, for me, after "Procrastinator."

Anyway. I am caught in the medical world wind tunnel. Of course I hope I am declared fine and healthy, but then it does feel like more of a waste of money. A horrible diagnosis, no one wants, but at least it justifies the expenses, and I am really sort of kidding.

So my pumpkin spice coffee is waiting for me, as well as Miss Charlotte Claire, who has lots to talk about this morning...she's the first of the home schoolers awake, so she deserves some one on one...:)

what's wrong with this picture????!!!

I like to read the news, to know what's going on in the world. But oh my goodness, things are so backwards sometimes. A lady had a baby, and her boyfriend, in secret complicity with the hospital staff, had the newborn dressed in a onsie that said, "Will you marry me?", and when the new mother opened the swaddling blanket, she was so surprised! Yahoo news! Is it just me, or is this a little out of order?

I am not being individually critical of anyone. I'm really not. But let's not just pretend it's all okay.

Abortion has been in the news lately too. Your tax dollars funding procedures you may or may not support...but have you ever actually looked at a Planned Parenthood site and read about the abortion procedure? It's started out by assuring the pregnant patient that it's perfectly normal to have one, 3 out of 10 women have one by the time they're 45. It actually said this on the random local site I looked at! The description of the whole procedure is too awful to write about here, but not once does it refer to the baby as a baby. If it's been 12 weeks since your last period, the procedure will go as follows...(gently suctioning..., ect...) Then to my horror,..."if it's been 16 or more weeks since your last period, then...." Seriously.

Lots of people have opinions about things. Women have rights, ect. But I told my little girls a little bit the other day, as we went on a walk, a rough outline of what abortion is. I spared them the gory details of course, but I felt I needed to teach them about it.

It is spoken of as, "a reproductive right."

Did you ever stop and think about how wonderful this world would be if there were no sin? If each and every person, when tempted to sin, endured that temptation, said NO, and was good instead? There would be no lying. No stealing. No assault, murder, or rape, no greed or evny, or corruption. If each and every person on the earth got a connection to God, and lived to please Him, the trickle down effect would be a peaceful earth.

Because the problems in this world are not because of laws...or lack of laws, or because of this country or that country.

I cannot change the world, obviously. I can't change anyone but myself. And I am working on that, one temptation at a time.

This fine day, I am heading out the door to babysit for a few of my brother's grandchildren, he has an appointment. Kathryn doesn't work today so she's staying here with Camille, who still has a fever. (Cam's doing better though, she made herself a whopping bowl of oatmeal, and at the whole thing.)

Yesterday, we mostly stayed home, except for walking home from the collision shop after dropping the van off, then walking up there to pick it up later...which was interesting. We brought Sunny the first time, she was fine...then Suri the next time, and she was not fine. As we got close to the highway, she started really pulling at the leash...then she actually pulled me so hard, I fell! Flat! I hit two knees, one hand, and my chin. Chin, right in the gravel. Yeah, I started crying. I'm a big girl, and big girls fall hard. Jonny was so concerned, I collected myself pretty fast and said I was fine. But all I wanted to do was hide in the bathroom and cry. Suri is not used to being around the traffic, I guess.

In the afternoon, I took Suzanne and Evelyn to the vision center for exams and new glasses. It was a different doctor, and he asked Suzanne if she was the youngest. No, she said, I am the twelfth. He didn't understand her at first. When he did, he looked at me, and said, "You have TWELVE CHILDREN?" Suzanne answered that no, she also has 4 younger siblings. He was floored. Asked if we were Amish. I could see him looking for my newly grown horns. It was rather embarrassing.

Anyway, Mali and little Lydia met us there, and we enjoyed their company. Lyd played at the little playground in the middle of the mall, she climbed up those steps and went down the slide, then got knocked over by another little girl at the bottom of the slide...she was broken hearted until the little girl hugged her and said she was sorry...Lydia liked the hug so much, she broke out in loud crying again when it ended, and the other girl rushed back over and hugged her again, making Lydia stop immediately and smile her cheesy little smile. It was adorable.

Anyway...time to get moving. Van trouble again, shop in town this time...engine light...rrr.

p.s. I just want to add that obviously this is my blog, and all opinions are my own, and in no way should reflect on anyone but me.:) (sometimes I just have to vent.)

beauty....

The back yard...I went outside with the dogs this morning, and just soaked it in.

These two are crazy. They wrestle and fight and the house isn't big enough for them sometimes. Duke politely declines to play with them. He tolerates so much garbage from Sunny, then he does a little warning growl and snap once in a while, which Sunny totally respects. He actually hasn't had to do that in a long time, I guess, because Sunny mostly just licks his face and wags her tail and he doesn't care.


I walked four days in a row! And I am going to walk again in a few minutes, as our van has to go back up to the collision shop down the road for a few tweaks, and I am going to walk back home. I have backed off on sugar again, for the most part...I can make it through the whole day eating good nutritious food...then last night, I ate some chocolate. Not terrible much, but still. And I have a Cadbury Mint Crunch bar the girls brought me from South Africa. It's calling me, but I asked my girls last evening if they wanted any..."nah", they said. (It's beyond me how anyone could ever be so disinterested in chocolate, especially with mint crunch!). So I didn't crack into it, because then I would eat it all. So I will wait until I have some sharers.

Since Paul and a few of the older kids were gone last evening, I offered to bring home pizza for the other kids...who am I kidding, I relished the thought of not making dinner! So I picked up three Little Caesars pizzas, and an 8 pack of wings. I did not eat any pizza, but I did eat wings.

Right now I am sipping my pumpkin spice coffee...no sweetener, just pumpkin flavored coffee. I made the pot after Paul went to work and Evelyn went out the door to school...there was a cup left from the coffee they had, and shh, I poured it down the drain when the pumpkin stuff was done.

Home school kids waking up...Camille is all stuffy...she doesn't feel well..

ahh, blogging....

I walked three days in a row! Yay me! It's hard to swallow...the being in bad shape...after years of huffing and puffing, then finally getting serious....getting results...then letting the fitness side just sort of sliiiiide. Getting back up that evil hill is serious business. It's a harsh reality of burning thighs and the old huffing. I brought the little girls with me a few times lately, and Cam is on fire to help me! She says when it's too slippery outside, we are going to get the mats out and work out!

I really wonder about how we're programmed as people. There are the No Excuses group...Paul is one of those. He is as busy as can be, but he works out and eats right. If I had a choice, I would choose this chair and to blog, or to read a book in my comfy bed. Or to sit on the deck in the sun. In the pool even, I would rather lounge about than swim. I have to MAKE myself do things. Laziness is just in my blood.

And here's some good news: my MRI came out fine, which is of course wonderful, but then why do I get the wonkiest symptoms...that come and go? I am thinking pinched nerve somewhere...it does kill me because an MRI is so expensive. Oh well.

This Friday I go to the cardiologist for a stress test...yay, I get to huff and puff on a treadmill in the dr.'s office!

This fine morning, I am heading to the dentist with Jonathan. Miss Char and Miss Cam scored a sleepover with at Emily, Abigail, and Mirielle's house last night. I will come back from the little city and pick them up, then go back to that city for gymnastics class. Paul and the older kids are working at the basketball game tonight at the Dome, but I am staying home with the rest of the kids...Evelyn, Suzanne, Sonja, Jon, Char, and Cam. I promised them a cozy evening.

I just had some quinoa for breakfast. I know it's high in carbs, so I measured carefully to make sure it was only one serving. I ate it with just a little bit of cream and no sweetener, and it was really good. It has a lot of protein in it.

This coming Saturday is one of our girls' hotel sleepover nights. They are the best! All of the moms there have lots of kids...so we don't run out of things to talk about. It's good for our hearts to be together, we don't gossip or backbite, but we encourage each other in our battles, and it's so nice to be with such good friends who aren't trying to one-up each other or be "right". We are getting old, I am the youngest of the group...

I so hate driving in the winter. And winter is back, here in central New York state...after some days of warmth, days of rain, the snow has brightened our windows again. The transition from rain to snow makes the roads slippery.

In the Never A Dull Moment scheme, our red minivan is back from the shop...the engine light thing fixed (a sensor causing not enough oxygen, or something like that). But something is still wrong with a different sensor, which was caused by the body repair shop, according to the auto shop in town. The little details in life...phone calls and appointments and things to straighten out...no wonder we love our vacations.

Yesterday was an amazing day. We stayed home, except for our walk, and except for me driving to town to get the minivan. We did school, and the girls made slime with flour and dishwashing liquid. Camille is fascinated with making pulley systems from linking all the dog leashes, stringing them out the kitchen window down to the swingset in the back yard, and sending things down in a basket. They have been playing Barbies, reading library books (no tablets or movies or t.v. during the day!), and there are gym mats covering most of the living room floor. They do not get bored.

Our dinner was yummy last night. I cut the chicken breasts into big pieces, rolled them in flour, and browned them in olive oil...then added them to two cans of cream of chicken soup with extra water in it...and simmered it for almost an hour....the chicken came out so tender and yummy. Cam helped me peel five pounds of potatoes for mashies, and all of them got eaten. We had broccoli and corn too.

It was very chilly in the dining area, so we had our dinner in the living room....with the fake fire place going, and watching, Antiques Roadshow, Civil War Relics Edition...it was nice. We like to shout out how much things are worth...not that we watch it very often, but it was a good episode with lots of history. One guy had an actual prosthetic arm from a great great grandfather, with a picture of him using it, and lots of letters...one letter was written and signed by Walt Whitman, who felt compassion for wounded soldiers who couldn't write to their loved ones...(that was assessed for like twenty grand).

Anyway. It's time to leave for our dentist appointment...

sweet saturday....

Here's a random collection of thoughts from this fine Saturday afternoon...my day started way too early, thanks to our very own old man dog, Mr. Duke. He's getting rather crazy. He wakes during the night and does this little "ruff" thing...then again...more frequent, a little louder, until someone gets up and lets him outside. And for some strange reason, no one else in the family EVER hears him. He has done this several times this week...it's hard for me to go back to sleep, and when I have to get up early, by the time I'm almost back to sleep, it's time to get up.

And, Mr. Duke is having trouble getting up our deck stairs. I feel very sorry for him, and I know I have been saying this for a long time, but his days are very numbered. For his own sake, he is going over that rainbow bridge one of these days, wah.

We are having a warm day here in central New York state. It hit fifty degrees today! I went for a walk with Char and Cam, 1.7 miles.

We went down the road and saw the horses, the cows, and the alpacas.

Some of the kids are here and there, but Char and Cam are making a pulley system out the back window to the swingset. I asked what they were doing, they said, "nothing!".

Paul was out in the garden, and now is running sprints. He's going to the symphony tonight with Emily and a few friends. So maybe I will do something fun with those who are still home. "Something Fun" is a concept that was much easier when they were all little, and McDonald's playland was a blast. The carousel at the mall was Something Fun. Now Something Fun inevitably costs me a lot of money.

I talked to Samuel today! He had an interesting time at the Inauguration. He was in front of the capital building, seating people. Mostly, though, they stood at attention and watched, just to be there. He hadn't felt well, but he survived, and said he was thankful for our prayers for him. He does not like crowds, and well...that was a crowd!