a sad and fond farewell to grampa....

Paul's dad passed away this morning. He was 86 years old and had a good life. I personally loved him. Seriously. He was only 55 when I met Paul, five years older than Paul is now. And shh, but I thought he was so handsome! He was always so nice to me, too. He was just easy to talk to. This past summer I visited him on his front deck a few times, and boy, one didn't get bored talking away the afternoon with him. Even when we went to see him in hospice care, he was laughing and telling jokes. He couldn't remember that he was in Florida half the time by then, but he did remember way back when.

My kids cried their eyes out as they waited for the bus this morning. I reminded them that Grampa had a good life, and a good passing, according to Emily. She is in Florida now, and was with him when he died. She is somewhat of an expert on passings, as a nurse in the medical intensive care, she sees them almost daily. She says some are horrific, mostly because of the way families don't want to let go, and the way our western culture holds on to life at all costs. So Grampa passed away quite peacefully in his sleep this morning. Just the way he would have wanted it.

And I am sad. Paul is at work. He has this huge project going, can't just leave. I called him and told him we have to go visit his mom for a few days soon. He agreed. I just want to give her a big hug. Because I know she is relieved that his suffering is over, but I know there will be a huge emptiness in her life. She took good care of him.

When someone dies, other things in life lose their significance.

Poor Mali was in class up at school in the big city when she found out...facebook. (I didn't think to ask what she was doing on facebook in class!)(don't kill me, Mali!) anyway, what a way to find out that your grampa has died. She wasn't thrilled, but I reminded her that that is the way things are these days. facebook: the biggest blabbermouth.

We are getting lots of snow today. 20 degrees, wind blowing, snow. Blinding snow. I am staying right where I am this afternoon. Joseph is trying to get out of the driveway to go pick up Samuel. I thought I needed a few things from the store, but ha, I guess I don't.

I haven't exercised yet today, and the first trip kids will be home soon. I haven't even had lunch, although I do admit to sneaking two spoonfuls of the cookie dough that is dwindling in the baggy in the fridge. There is no longer enough to bake a batch of cookies....and this is the first time I have been into it since the other day when I made the dough. We live in a house of cookie-dough-aholics.

That's another thing about when someone dies. It's hard to care about things like what I eat.

My two little princesses are home today. They have been playing Barbies in their room for hours. They are so in love with staying home on a day like today!

Suri is resting on the couch. Yes, that bad dog can get up onto the furniture already! Here I carry her up and down the steps so she can go potty outside, and she climbs up onto the couch. She never has liked the floor, even with her comfy bed. Good thing I was just paying attention to her, she had her fentanyl patch off! I grabbed it before she chewed on it. I was supposed to remove it this afternoon anyway. She is paying too much attention to her incision, I hope we don't have to take her in for one of those big cones...well, actually she WOULD look hilarious.