Sunday funday bread day spaget day.....

Baking bread...





Homemade meatballs and sauce, spaghetti squash for me, pasta for the kids. I did have some bread though, oh heavenly yum, it was good.


Paul...he's still so cute. He and I stopped over at Ben and Ashley's for a little outside "distance" visiting yesterday.


Jonny, I made him a mask. I was glad to find this fabric, a little better than the pretty ones I made the girls and I.

We're going to make popcorn soon, and watch a movie. It's chilly and rainy, but we woke up to sunshine this fine morning, so we sat out on the deck, fifty degrees or not. It was lovely. Tomorrow, it's going to clear off and be rather nice again, 52 and sunny. We'll take it!

I woke up this morning, thankful for my comfy bed, and thankful for our house. I've been thinking about the 24 Hour No Complaints Challenge, I saw it on Twitter. Who me, complain? Well, guess what, I have had my eyes opened to how many times I open my mouth to grump about things, about how someone put the can opener in the wrong drawer, didn't hang up the towel properly, let the dogs in without wiping their paws thoroughly, used the last paper towel, left a seltzer can on the counter, a blanket on the couch, a trail of coffee somewhere. Yes, I'm the mom, yes, I need to parent and to correct, teach, encourage, but most of these things come from irritation, plain and simple.

This "down time" we have these days of being sequestered from society! For me personally, it's not less busy, far from it! The days are noisy and busy, making meals more work, there are more dishes, more messes, but oh dear, I love it. I do not like the REASON we are shut in, of course. The suffering of the sick, the worry people are subject to, the economic repercussions, the toll on vulnerable kids, women in abusive situations, ect. I do not like all of those things. But for me, in my house, my home, it's very nice. I am tempted to worry, of course. I have four older kids in healthcare. It's not ALL sunshine and rainbows, but there are so many nice things about it, to be honest.

Anyway...time to make some popcorn.

why is your hair so messy?

Yes, he really asked this, on this fine morning, as I wandered into the kitchen to make coffee. He did. I had a million responses...

1. Because I never brush it?

2. Because I never do anything with it?

3. Because I just brush it with my fingers so it doesn't get all poufy?

4. Because who cares?

5. You're just noticing this NOW?

6. I haven't had it cut in over a year?

(we were SUPPOSED to have an appointment on the very day I flew back home from San Francisco, to get our hair done...)

I guess I should try a little harder, right? maybe?

It's beautiful out today, if you like winter and don't want it to ever ever end.


We were SO hopeful, when we dragged up the extra outdoor furniture from under the deck, and washed it all up nicely. Warmth, spring, sitting out in the sun! But it was a trick. The big bag of potting soil sitting there in the snow, ha.

Being in "lockdown" can get old, but shh, yesterday we needed some things from the store, so a few of us went. We had to get a prescription refilled, so we went in to Target. We split into groups of two, and walked by ourselves. One of Sonja's besties turned 18 yesterday, so we got her a few things, and a little gift bag to put them in, then dropped them off at her house on the way home. We social distanced, and used hand sanitizer. We went through the Starbucks drive through on the way home, the girls LOVE this.

What kind of world is it when you hate to admit that you went to Target?

Starting tomorrow, here in NY state, it is mandatory to wear masks in public. So many people are like, "Yes! Tell us what to do! Keep us safe!" But the truth of the matter is that even medical grade masks don't really help much,(non- N-95s) and homemade ones, or a bandana tied across your face, is really just a psychological barrier. Breathing through the cloth, getting it damp, is a magnet for germs. But we must, if we don't want trouble with the law.

My sewing machine is already on the table, and I have been looking around for mask patterns, I guess I'll start making some. I tried to mask up in the store, with a scarf, but my glasses fogged up. I found some patterns that use pipe cleaners across the bridge of the nose to hold the mask secure, and to prevent that fog.

I want to get pool supplies before they are deemed non-essential. I feel so privileged and spoiled that we have a yard, and a pool, because what on earth are the children in this country supposed to do when the weather is nice? How healthy is it for them to be inside, playing video games? Our government has had "get moving" campaigns, but this whole generation of children and teens, is forming bad habits! Snacking, sitting around, getting addicted to video games and Netflix. They are not going to want to get off their lazy behinds when things open back up again.

Parks, trails, playgrounds, beaches, closed. What a shame. Wouldn't it work better if the old people, the vulnerable people, locked down tightly, maybe only went on little walks, but had others deliver their groceries, etc., and the rest of the population just went out and lived life? I don't know. The lost jobs, the poverty, it's going to create more crime, more depression, more domestic violence, so much suffering for children. I think at the very least, people should be encouraged to get outside, to parks and trails and beaches, just distance yourselves.

I do realize that I don't know everything, don't see the big picture, it's just my armchair point of view.

What does bother me is how people seem to glom onto anything the government recommends, so blindly. Dr. A. Fauci, just a few months ago, assured us that masks don't help at all. I know, this whole thing is an unknown to the experts too, and we're all learning as we go, and hindsight is 20/20.

Today, I think I'll bake bread. Yesterday I made a triple batch of chocolate chip cookies, and bagged them up without touching them, 3 to a baggie, and dropped them off at Mariel's house for her to bring in for her fellow nurses. She said things have been crazy at work lately, and they'll love them.

Anyway, it's too quiet here, we stayed up 'til after midnight, watched the movie, "UP", which is adorable and so well done. The kids are on an awful schedule, but I can't make myself care. They still do their school work, and they don't have much going on, so if they want to play a huge game of RISK!, then start a movie with a few bags of microwave popcorn, at the very time they should be heading to bed, so what? Who cares? They can't do much else these days, although we do get outside, they do dance practices, and work out, and we walk... and tomorrow are planning to go on another excursion...to someplace outside, maybe the cemetery, maybe a little beach somewhere...it IS free donut day tomorrow at Dunkin, one free donut with any drink purchase, on the app...

a new day!!!

Paul played UNO with the kids last night. It can get loud in here! And that plant, I picked it up last week with the groceries, how dare I!!! It's as "unessential" as it gets! But isn't it pretty? And my humble opinion: if the store has spent the money on getting this plant there, and we don't buy it, it dies, and they lose money. So it's just doing one's part!

I think we all need to take a deep breath and get a second wind here. For me, a genuinely lazy person, a chair loving, no plans kind of girl, I like the slow pace. I like having the kids here so much, and our family dinners are fantastic. There's always someone to go for a walk with, and when we all pitch in and clean up, it's like old times.

But, I believe with all of my heart that this time has a purpose, and that purpose isn't just to pass time. I look forward to seeing all of my older kids again, and my friends, and traveling, and just going camping, but what I really long for is to gather oil, in life's situations. God is good.

The truth of the matter is that I've felt a little bit close to the end of my rope a few times, a suffocating feeling, been tempted with thoughts of doom and gloom, and I've had my share of being fearful, scared, and a few times, almost terrified...the thought of not being able to breathe is scarier than actually dying. In theory, I am not afraid to go meet my maker, but then, I find there is a bit of fear in that too.

Here's one thing that really helped me: When Jesus fell on his face and asked God, "Oh My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from Me; nevertheless less, not as I will, but as YOU will." He had to surrender HIS own will, had to give it to God, and we do, too. Jesus had been totally faithful all of His life, in every temptation, in all of his trials, yet He still had a battle there, near the end, but He overcame! He got victory! He entrusted Himself to God! And that is the way of peace. If I KNOW that God sends all things for my very best, and He is planning out my life, then where does fear fit in?

It is a battle, for sure, but we need to say NO to fear and worry and anxiety! I am thankful for this time, because I want to be free from those things!

Our governor, here in New York state, has stated that God has nothing to do with us having few cases of the virus here, it's all because of what WE have done. That is an extremely arrogant attitude! Has this whole thing taught him nothing? There's nothing in this world we can lean on, nothing we can trust!

Anyway, I am thankful this morning, there is so much to work on, and life is so hopeful. When we put our trust in Him, we shall not be put to shame.

a string of dull moments...

Life cannot be dull when nine people are in "lockdown" together in a big house on a country road, with two dogs and two kitties.
Oh they get tired!

We walked today, in the rain.

With Abigail


Evelyn took this pic yesterday, flowers from the front yard, and look at that pup's face!


Wulf is so cute! He liked finding eggs. I had a grand idea, I put money in some of the eggs, and Miss Cam found most of the ones with the cash! It was rather hilarious. The kids all agreed on this, though: It was nice that it was "unfair". They don't like things to be socialized, doled out equally. They just came out, gathered them up, and Cam just happened to hit the jackpot, to the tune of...$86! Then like $20 between the rest of them, ha.

Their Easter cake was a FAIL. I was talking on the phone to Emily, our oldest, and when I came out of my quiet room, the cake was in the oven. Well, imagine my surprise when I opened the oven, and two round cake pans with cake just overflowing from them, all over the bottom of the oven. I found out they had used one box of cake mix per pan, which is twice the amount needed. (I was thinking of the SIX eggs used, ugh!). It was a mini hullabaloo, as we considered scooping some out, but they weren't totally ruined. Homemade buttercream frosting, tinted pale yellow...they worked on that cake while I delivered a basket of candy to my dear granddaughter Lydia...it's so hard, I can only see her outside from a distance, so hard. Anyway, they ate some of the cake and made half into cake balls.

We had ham (it was SO good), mashed potatoes, rolls, and broccoli, oh and applesauce.

The day was a good one, except for this: I talked with Emily, and she is taking a job in a hospital in a hard hit area, in NY. She is not sure if she'll be sent to New York City or to Buffalo, but wherever she goes, it'll be to relieve overworked doctors and nurses. She's a nurse practitioner, and has ten years of hospital experience, most in I.C.U. She says she feels so obligated to go, where she is needed. She says when this is all over, and if she didn't go, she will always think she should have. I don't like it one little bit. Yes, I am proud of her, but then, I always have been. She is 35 years old, and if she gets sick...but then, we'll pray, won't we?

When you're a mom, even if your "kid" is 35, you still see their innocent little kindergarten face, and remember how they knew every word in How The Grinch Stole Christmas when they were only four, and could recite the 23 Psalm when they were five..."Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, For you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me..." If I ever knew, back when she was twirling around reciting that from her heart, that she would be voluntarily going off to fight such a deadly invisible enemy, oh my heart.

Oh my heart. She's taking a leave of absence from her general practice position, and leaving probably this week. She has always had this thing about things bothering her ears, and we all know that if healthcare workers are lucky enough to get all the protective gear they need, it's irritating to wear. So this is what I made for her today, from one of Paul's old t-shirts...


The buttons are to hook the mask over, to take the pressure off the ears. She will have to try this on, so I can see if I got the position of the buttons right, and the tightness right, before I make more.

The little girls, Miss Char and Miss Cam, are watching dance videos and practicing dancing, for gym class. Evelyn is done with online college for now, and is making chicken noodle soup for dinner.

I am not bored yet. There is always something to do. And sometimes, there is NOTHING to do, and I find that delightful!

Well, the other day we went for a drive, which is still legal here in New York state. We drove up to Lake Ontario, and oh dear it was fierce, but beautiful. Cold and windy and lovely.
(and the cookies, well, I didn't have any, but I did bake them...)(Mirielle is a nurse, and said her co-workers will still eat the cookies she bakes, so I am excited because I'm going to bake a HUGE batch of c.chip cookies for them!...gloves, of course...)

And yes, that is Samuel in that pic, he is staying with us for a bit here in NY. He'll be doing some of his Army Reserves training online, and hopefully he'll be heading back to Virginia in a few weeks.

Life doesn't always go in a smooth straight line, as we all know. And stories aren't always mine to tell. But I take comfort in knowing that God knows the beginning and the end of all things, and He causes all things to work together for the good, for those who love Him. Can you imagine? All things work together for the GOOD? No matter the circumstances in life, God is good, and He wants the very best for us.

Our Easter dinner will be very nice. We have ham, and will have mashed potatoes, and rolls, and a veggie from the freezer, oh, and we found a jar of applesauce in the pantry! Margaret and Adrian and Wulf will be coming over. Now shh, before you think judge-y thoughts, remember this: Evelyn lived upstairs from them before all this happened, and still works a few days a week in an office within walking distance from their house, and has to go back to their place to use the facilities, and also to watch Wulf while Margaret has doctor appointments, ect. So they still see each other. They are the one family we have allowed to still come over here, as they have been in careful lockdown at their place.

So are there risks? Probably. And I'm sure there are readers who consider them capitol offenses, and are calling the police on me right now, ha. But we still have to live our lives, and Mr. Wulf-in-stein, as Paul calls him, the Wulfmeister, has so much energy, he comes here and gets to run around and play outside and see his beloved Aunt Abby, and JONNY. He loves Jonny.

Our outings are sparse, and usually just consist of getting a coffee, and driving around. We are running low on things again, so one of these days we'll venture out and abide by the rules: masks on, one person in the store at a time, essentials only. Now, "essentials" is a tricky concept, as one man's essentials are another man's frivolities. I know someone who recently went into a store just to buy some jigsaw puzzles. We've all probably seen the news where in Michigan, and in Vermont, no non-grocery items, or "non-essentials" are to be sold at all, so the geniuses actually roped off the plants and flowers in the Costco stores, and all the other stores, and they get to sit there and rot, or be brought out and dumped, because heaven forbid someone grab some beautiful tulips or a rosebush while they're getting their big bags of potato chips.

What, I want to know, about all the Vermonters who want to plant gardens? Even in World War II we had Victory gardens!!! It seems this goes beyond keeping people safe. Assume we have no common sense at all, and take all of everything we have, in the name of peace and safety! I just hope we can get pool supplies, and yes, I do feel ashamed of my privilege sometimes, that if we cannot go anywhere this summer, at least we could swim in our pool. Does my heart break for all the kids, the moms, the teenager, the older people, who won't have that luxury, and can't even go to a local pool or park to cool down or pass the hours? Of course it does.

Keep praying.

This world is getting quite a shaking. My own take is that it's a good time to put your trust in God, if you haven't already. When you do this, all the things that happen to you take on a new meaning. Trials become opportunities, chances to get saved, to get oil in your lamp. You KNOW that the very hairs of your head are numbered! Instead of a hard and heavy life, days become short and light. I still don't LIKE the trials, but there is comfort in knowing you can get eternal value from them! You can read articles in activechristianity.org, which are really really encouraging and helpful.

It's plain to see that all we would put our trust in can crumble away, and that money and success are worthless. Yes, it's a good time to turn to God.

Today, we're doing an Easter egg hunt. I dug around in the closet and found plastic eggs from who knows when, still in the packages. I bought candy back in February, early March. Yesterday we put on some gloves, and filled six baskets for different friends and delivered them. We might make a cake and decorate it all pretty with jelly beans and little bunnies.

The weather here in the Northeast is bleak, cloudy, cozy, but warm today, will reach 60 degrees. Then tomorrow, warmer but really windy and then...the rest of the week, chilly, very cold at night, snow mixed with rain, only in the forties during the days...I just have to think of them as cozy days, right?

Ah well, have a really nice Easter, count your blessings, and give your heart to Jesus.

winter is visiting!!!!

Yes, it's snowing, and snowing, and snowing.

I'm not sure if we'll go out for drive-through free donut day. The kids say they shouldn't eat donuts every week (what?! they're growing up, aren't they?). I don't eat donuts anymore, although I admire them, and love the smell, the aroma. If you know me, you'll realize quickly that I'll never get over my fondness for baked goods. Bread, muffins, bagels, cookies, cinnamon raisin toast, love it all. I don't eat it anymore, because "a little" might well open the gate, and well, let's just not.

Can you believe it's been a whole week since donut Friday? I can't. Time isn't dragging through this quarantine for me. We keep busy enough.

I'm looking forward to filling Easter baskets! It's one of my favorite things. This year, I'll be dropping some off at some friends' places, too...can't wait.

just beauty-full

Do you see this? It's actual sunshine and warmth! Together! And our schedule happens to be a tad bit skimpy, so we might be able to fit in some sunbathing on the deck.

The girls are fretting a bit about school. Cam had a grade go from 99 to 97, and was sad, and oh dear, in the big scheme of things, seriously? They have to be online for each class, and are nervous about it. I have reminded them that if they do their work, and learn, that's enough. It's not the time to be weighed down by things.


Messy me this fine morning..


The latest puzzle. We don't even have a toddler, but we still manage to lose the last piece.


Blue skies, seeds planted...


A snack for dinner, because they had huge lunches...

I have no complaints.