and tomorrow we depart for Georgia!

Phew. I am so last-minute-y. I have to pack and and and, but also I have to go buy $300 worth of candy for the candy store for the church conference this weekend. I will miss most of it, but I will still buy the candy.

Anyway. About Samuel...I know that God causes all things to work together for the good for those who love Him. I know that if Sam gets cycled out of the Army because of this hurt hand/not passing the PT test, it will work out. But my heart will still break for him. He set his mind on being a soldier several years ago, and has never let the idea go. No, he was going Infantry. Didn't matter that he tested high enough to choose from lots of occupations in the Army, no, he was going Infantry. He counted the days to Basic, and has done really well on everything. He is a Sharpshooter, and seems to have adapted well to the brutal schedule and busy tiring days. But, apparently he has to do those push-ups in order to graduate. And if he finds out tomorrow that he won't be graduating, oh dear. My heart will break for him.

We are still packing up and heading south. What else can we do? If he doesn't graduate, he will hopefully get leave before the begin cycling him out, I guess it takes 6 weeks or so. There is also a possibility. they will put him in a 30 day program, a second chance type of thing. Tomorrow, we will find out.

In the mean time, life goes on. I have been cleaning our pool, we don't have a vacuum for it, so I scoop those leaves out, and skim the fluffy cottonwood fluffies from the top.

We have been outside alot. Paul ran over Charlotte Claire's bike yesterday, but we had Sonja's old one under the deck. It's bigger, but Char tried it and it's fine.

Paul hung one of those huge fat climbing ropes from one of our trees, the girls LOVE climbing it and swinging on it.

On the way home from church this afternoon, Kathryn promised the little girls she would make cupcakes with them. Well, we didn't have any cake mix, and I didn't feel like looking up a recipe, or baking anything at all, for that matter, but. I helped them mix up a triple batch of cookie dough. Some chocolate chip, some plain oatmeal, and some oatmeal with chocolate covered rasberries, white chocolate chips, and craisins. Now, I have not eaten one. I do not plan on eating any. I did taste the dough, because I substituted the shortening with coconut oil, and butter. yum. But. I do not want to eat cookies. Ten of our kids still live at home, and if I bide my time, the cookies will be gone, and phew, I will be okay. I wrapped some up for lunches, and left some dough in the 'fridge for Joe to either eat or bake for the little girls during the week. It smells so absolutely heavenly in here right now though, I can't even stand it. blah.

I ate well today. One egg and some Ezekiel toast for breakfast. Some grilled chicken breast and watermelon for lunch. A baggie of hot air popcorn and four almonds for snack. A burger with pickles and no bun for dinner.

It's funny, because I feel so much better when I eat well, both mentally and physically. But when I have a headache or am tired, the first thing I want to do is eat chocolate, or console myself with a little bit of ice cream. Not that I regularly give in, but why is it so in me to sabotage my own self?

I am writing a list for Joseph, so he can get the little girls out the door to the bus smoothly. Oh dear. I packed them each a bin of clothes for the week, so they can choose what they want but stuff that's already matched. If Joe picked out their clothes I would never be able to show my face at school again. That frilly party dress with sneakers because it's a gym day? Stripes and plaid?

I also baggy-ed up some stuff for their lunches.

Ah well, my thoughts are pretty scrambled up right now, and I do have a headache. It has been a really headache-y few days for me, perhaps all those fluffies in the air are messing with my sinuses, I don't know. I am tired though, and hope I can sleep with all these thoughts running through my brain....