summer 2011

summer 2011

Paul and I, all 16 kids and Ashley, Benjamin's wife...Christmas 2012

Paul and I, all 16 kids and Ashley, Benjamin's wife...Christmas 2012
family

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

are you kidding ME?

It was six-thirty in the morning. My head ached. It had ached all night long in my sleep. One of those nights in which I was too tired to get up and take ibuprofen. blah. I decided just to get up instead of lying there with a headache. I took the ibuprofen, ate a few slices of pear, and took Rosie on a walk. Not too long, as it was 32 degrees out and I had just a sweatshirt on with my skirt. The cold made my head throb....but it felt so nice to walk.

Everyone got on the bus, it is just Charlotte Claire and I up. Ashley went to work, Mirielle and Joseph went to college. Rosie is asleep in her cage.

I do not FEEL motivated to deny myself today. But I baggied up the brownies left from last night, so I wouldn't be tempted to cut those tiny little tastes that add up. I made my usual oatmeal with peanut butter for breakfast.

I really want to go back to bed. blah. I think I have a monthly kind of headache, the hormone-induced variety. I always thought that when I got really serious about getting into shape, I would get pregnant, so I half thought this would be the month. blah. It is one of those I Want To Jump Off A Cliff days. Not REALLY, but just blah. But this IS the day that the Lord has made. I shall not take my grumpiness out on everyone else. I shall not be miserable. There is so much to be happy about. Feelings can go up and down, and they do, but I still believe God, that He sends everything for my best.

Charlotte Claire just said, "Mom - Look! It's Candyland!" She has been into the game closet! And now Camille is joining us....

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

I feel terrible, missed snack day AGAIN

blah. I looked at the snack calendar for Sonja's class this morning. Somehow I thought today was Wednesday the sixth, and I said, "Sonja, you missed your snack day yesterday!" She answered that the teacher never said anything. Well...now it is obvious WHY she never said anything. Today is her snack day. blah.

Congratulations, Sherah!!! Just take life one day at a time! God never ever gives more than we can bear. Those days with little ones and babies are so hard, but if I could go back and do it all over again, I would stress even less over the house, and enjoy those little ones even more.

Okay - I should be skinny by now. This weight loss/excercise thing takes way too long. We saw the Willie Wonka play the other night, and Veruka sang, "I want the whole world...and I want it NOW!" Instant gratification. Instant results, that is what I want. Each and every day, I have to deny myself, limit myself about a hundred times. And to go on my walk, I have to practically threaten myself. It isn't like Oh Goody, A Walk!! I get to sweat and huff! But it is the same with everyday life, there has to be a goal, or it won't work. I have to believe in the goal, and trust that I can make it work. Sometimes when I am tempted to have something that I know I don't need, I will think about riding that bike. "Looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy set before Him, endured the cross...."(heb. 12) Yes, the spiritual life is the same. When we have a vision, then the trials are not drudgery. We willingly suffer rather than sin.

All the time I have been writing this, I have been tortured by the thought of sweet little Sonja in school with no snack for her class AGAIN. I am not certain if I am tortured more for her sake, or for my own pride. I am thinking that by the time I packed these guys up, went to the store and bought a snack, brought them and the snack into the school, it would be too late. I could wake up Mirielle to watch them, but Tuesday is her day off. Her day to sleep in. blah.

Bad Mom Award.

To top it off, Jonathan is home today. Because I overslept. Probably from all that excercise yesterday. I woke up at eight o'clock!!! I hurried out of bed, just kidding, I struggled out of bed, every muscle in my body protesting, and woke them up. It was snowing out like crazy, what a nice day to just keep them home....but no, they can't just miss school for no reason...so I hurried them and encouraged them and somehow they made it. But not Jonathan. He gets so upset when the routine is different, he cried and couldn't make it work. He just couldn't stop crying, worried that he wouldn't make it in time. I told him it was okay, he could stay home. Maybe I am a fool, ha -probably, but I cannot send a boy out the door in tears. Besides, could school possibly be as fun as playing MarioCart with Charlotte Claire?

Our house is doing a Protest. The refridgerator is leaking all over the floor sporadically. The dryer is running very slow...(so am I, as I haven't gotten in there to clean yet..eeks, blah, I don' t want to!), and the hot water heater is dying. Paul has spent far too many hours trying to fix it, and we still have cold to lukewarm water. So today he is getting a new one. Yay for hot water again! No wonder we never get any improvements done around here, we are too busy fixing what breaks. So we sort of stay even.

We have a half gallon of milk, no bananas or apples....I have to go to the store. I am thinking Aldi. The fresh produce isn't always great, but the prices are good. I get frozen orange juice there, and their yogurt is good and cheap. Should I pack up all of these guys, or wait until the kids get home from school and go when I take Sam for his new sneakers? The bigger kids are like, "The grocery store too? Are you kidding?" As if they didn't eat up all the food. Oh well. You can please some of the people some of the time....

Monday, April 4, 2011

hurry hurry hurry...

I still have that feeling in everything I do, that feeling that The Baby is waiting for Mommy. That I have to hurry hurry hurry. Years and years and years of hurrying...eating my dinner like lightening so I could take the fussy baby back from someone, doing half-good jobs on things because I knew the baby would be waking up...hurrying.

Now, my baby is three. I don't really have to hurry anymore. But I do have lots of things to do, and sometimes everyone wants me at once. This afternoon, I decided to go to the pool with Suzanne, Sonja, and Jonathan. It opened at five, and I had to pick Mali up from track practice at 5:40. Hurry, hurry, hurry. We had twenty minutes in the water, which is better than nothing. Then home to give them some dinner. Joseph so nicely drove Samuel, Margaret, Kathryn, and Evelyn to soccer practice. They ate sandwiches before they left.

I am not hurrying right now, however. Three very rambunctious children are jumping around in this very livingroom. Jonathan seemed to GAIN energy from his swim. How come I didn't?

I walked today, too! I took Rosie-The-Bad-Dog with me this time, rrr. She pulls on that leash like she is missing something really wonderful a few feet ahead...I try the stop everytime she pulls method, and I don't get anywhere. blah. She did get tired out on the way home. So did I.

I also took some time for myself and crawled into bed and finished another book...it was a stupid romance novel, but it was a nice break. The kids were watching a movie in the afternoon, and I sneaked away. I don't do this very often, but I would love to. The only thing is that when I got up, I wanted cookies and coffee.

Oh well...it is getting to be story time.

rainy monday

Rosie doesn't step around mud puddles. Every morning, she is as enthusiastic to go outside as if it were the first time ever. She is not one of those nice calm dogs. I was thinking the other day that if I had gotten a Golden Retriever and put as much time into it's training as I have Rosie, I would actually have a good dog. But I have Rosie, instead. She is a sweetie, though. I love to say things to her that she doesn't understand so she tilts her head...this morning she was a very good girl on her walk, so I gave her the empty peanutbutter jar. It challenges her for a while.

Suzanne asked me this morning what I am going to do today. Well, I said, I think I am going to resist temptation. Not just the usual temptations like Getting The Last Word and Wanting To Be Right, but things like Fruit Loops and Popcorn, and Too Much Of Anything. She said, "THAT'S what you're going to do today??!" Why, what else should I do. Oh, sweep and clean and make dinner....I know, she was wondering if I was going anywhere.

Speaking of dinner...I made a good one last night. I used some of the chicken breast I had frozen in marinade. I roasted that in the oven while I prepared the pot of soup. I do cheat, I used five cans of Campbells Savory Seasoned Cream of Celery soup. I added chopped onion and celery, two pounds of baby carrots, a few pounds of peeled cubed potatoes, and a pound and a half of frozen mixed veggies. Then the cubed roasted chicken, and it is good soup. Pretty healthy, too, so I had seconds. We had cantaloupe with dinner, too.

This morning I am having my new favorite, oatmeal with crunchy peanutbutter in it. It is so yummy, and the peanut butter "holds" me for so much longer.

It is a good thing I like cloudy gloomy weather, or it would be miserable to live here in Central New York state. Spring is just taking it's sweet time this year. The yard is already soggy from the over a hundred inches of snow that melted into it, now it is raining. The kids don't care though. Yesterday they built a lean-to in the woods next to the house. To them, fifty degrees is summer. Flip-flop weather. When it gets that warm, they abandon the house except to run in for drinks and important stuff. Camille came all the way in for a red plastic toy salt shaker yesterday because "we are playing house." Why do you need THAT, though? "Because we are playing house." Okay.

I am thinking to take a few of them to the pool with me again this afternoon. It is interesting to have a new goal. It isn't as much about suffering as I though it would be. I haven't really dieted in years. I have tried to cut back, eat more healthy, but not intentionally try to lose weight. In high school I wanted to look good in my prom dress, so I practically starved myself for a while. I got down to 123, and it felt good. Oh well. But my normal weight was only 128. blah. I was reading a blog last night where the mom goes back to her fitness routine slowly during the babies first weeks. The first week she is walking farther than I do now! But I do not choose to get depressed or discouraged, not yet anyway. I have had the thought,"what if I don't lose a pound?" blah.

I have also had the thought, "what if I get pregnant?" I would be so YAY I couldn't stand it. No worries there. Oh, that would be SCRUMPTIOUS.

Today, couch monster. Perhaps start on the dreaded and procrastinated Laundry Room.

Sunday, April 3, 2011

lovely afternoon

It is nice here in central New York state...52 degrees, partly sunny, oh so nice. I peeked at the forecast for the week, and blah, today is another one of those isolated nice days we get here, hemmed in on both sides by snow, or as we head in to spring, rain. Yesterday was nice too, although I wasn't able to get out in in much.

The forecast: 90% chance of rain for tomorrow. It won't be as nice as it is today until next Saturday.

I went on my walk today. Imagine my surprise as I approached the evil hill and: Rosie-The-Bad-Dog came trotting up to greet me! She was very distraught when I left, she saw me put the sneakers on, and her hopes were UP. Then, I closed the door behind me...I heard her whimpering was I went down the deck steps. Blah. Guilt for leaving the kids is enough, thank you. Anyway, Mirielle went to check on the clothes she was drying on the deck, and Rosie bolted. Samuel came all the way down the road to get her. She wouldn't go with him because I was going the other way...so I graciously gave up the hike on the evil hill and went homeward with Sam and Rosie...but when he brought her in the house, I continued down the road the other way, and took the wimpier hill. I still feel good that I took my walk.

I think funny thoughts sometime. Today's funny thought: maybe God had Rosie escape so I wouldn't go up that hill because I surely would have had The Heart Attack today. I don't put much stock in these funny thoughts, but they do flit across my mind.

I am resting after my strenuous walk, I am wimpier than the hill I took. The kids are all outside, so I am going to join them....

Happy is what I am today. I cannot explain it, but after all these years I am finally dedicated to getting into better shape, and it is exciting. It isn't impossible to deny myself. I brought the beautiful yellow frosted cake that Margaret made, to church today and shared if after lunch. I took just a taste, and that was good enough. well...more would have been yummy, but it didn't kill me. I just have this big focus, finally, mainly because of my health. I want to live to see those grandchildren...and I have a few other goals...

1. I want to ride a bike again. No, I am not kidding.

2. I want to run. I have dreams of running down the beach like I did when I was growing up. I don't think I will be able to do the front handsprings or back-walkovers again, but still, running sounds good.

A cup of coffee sounds good right now...and of course a stack of cookies....but not today. I shall not have cookies today.

Friday, April 1, 2011

it was SO worth it....

Camille told me today that she loves me. She also said, "I love you when you take me to McDonalds! And I hate you when you don't!" All with that big smile on her face.

The three elementary kids had free Happy Meal certificates from school, so we went to day. I ate the burger from Jon's and bought him a chicken sandwich. Then I had a side salad and a fruit and yogurt parfait. And a coffee.

Easter candy...I let them each pick out a pack of Peeps. They come in so many colors now! They can't have any until Easter, but they had fun picking them. I stocked up on apples and bananas and grapefruit and red and green peppers. And milk and eggs and wraps and bread and juice and dogfood and detergent.

We are going to the pool soon. I found where some of the lost towels were. One of my sons apparently doesn't like his room very bright, so he used four large beach towels over his curtains and miniblinds. nice. I stole them, washed them, and packed them for the pool. If he wants it dark, he can close his eyes. Or find an old sheet. But leave my towels alone!

Anyway, we had such a good day today. The five of them (Suzanne, Sonja, Jonathan, Charlotte and Camille) were so well-behaved. Suzanne and Sonja held the little girls' hands, and Jon walked in front of the cart and next to me and behind me and overall, we were continuously in someone's way. I tried to keep them near me and on one side of the aisle. Some people didn't mind when we came down an aisle, some people just were huffing in impatience. Camille dropped her bracelet in a puddle in the parking lot, and stopped to pick it up, which caused a lady to have to stop and wait for her. It WAS sprinkling out, but jeepers. I started to apologize on behalf of Camille, but didn't, as I was getting a little tired of people acting so put out just because they had to wait for us for a few seconds. Then I thought that would have been a perfect opportunity to be good, and that I should have been nice to that lady. Not that I was mean, but I didn't say anything where I usually would have. Most shoppers are nice and pleasant, today the store just seemed to have more of the other kind.

Popcorn. I could eat a whole bowl. I love popcorn. Panpopped with real butter, preferably, but microwaved is fine too. I buy the Orville Redenbocker's Tender White, so good, and the PopSecret Homestyle. But I am finding that a handful or two is fine. Oh, it is easy with all the kids around here I - just have to wait a few minutes, and it is all gone anyway.

I am off to make some dinner.....

random things....

1. Five state employees just shared the 319 mega-million jackpot. Millions and millions of dollars each. It did cross my mind that I would love that. But would I really? yes.

2. I am not a good mother...not in the LEGAL sense anyway. I got my kids ready for school this morning, the three youngest. They started telling Bus Stories, which would be enough to make any mother say, "You can just stay home today, kids." I asked them if they just wanted to stay home, and Suze said, "Mom, you can't just let us skip school!" Good girl, has a little sense. I said I would pick them up early to spare them at least the bus ride home. How early?...um, eleven.

3. Last night Mirielle made the most delicious LOOKING chocolate cookies I have ever laid eyes on. (yay for me, right?)

4. I did have three Lindt chocolate truffles with white chocolate filling. So saying NO to the cookies wasn't as heroic as it sounds.

5. I am taking the kids to Aldi when I pick them up today. I will stock up on the apples and bananas and yogurt.

6. When we get home, I am giving them a healthy snack, packing up the swim suits, and taking them to the rec. center pool with Daddy as soon as he gets home.

7. I am making cupcakes for my niece's birthday celebration, which is tomorrow. I should probably bake them tonight.

8. I am also going to the birthday, along with Kathryn, Evelyn, Suzanne, Sonja, and Charlotte Claire.

9. After the birthday, a bunch of us are going to the play. Abigail is going with us now, too.

10. I should go make sure there are plenty of clean decent towels for the pool. Yes, I made a joke. Oh my goodness, when we got to the pool the other night, I saw that Sonja had this old beach towel, the white on it all dingy...oh dear. Oh well. See, that 19 million would come in handy.

11. Dinner last night was good. Boneless pork chops that had marinated in lemon/garlic for a day, baked in the oven. And basmati rice baked with a little bit of salt and some lemon-pepper seasoning, and olive oil. Three pounds of broccoli. And the leftover chicken from the night before, spruced up with some barbecue sauce and baked for a bit.

12. There are still cookies out there on that table. I won't even go into the kitchen today. ha. Kids, hurry up and eat them!!!

13. If I had 19 million dollars, I would hire a personal chef, a maid, and a cleaning lady. Oh yes I would. I would still do the shopping though. And I think I would still use coupons. I would get an Endless Pool. They are the coolest things. Small indoor pool with a current to swim against. Yes, and I would put it in the addition. One of the additions. Never mind.