I know I am.
Grateful. Thankful. Happy. Yet frustrated that I now have no idea why I have this pain. I can live with the pain, it isn't horrible, ha, it's easier than dancing through the medical world and waiting for phone calls. As long as it's not life-threatening, I don't really care. But what if ignoring it makes it worse? I read a futuristic novel once where the people had this annual scan which could detect pretty much any ailment...I need one of those.
Or perhaps I should just put my head back in the sand.
In any case, today is a good day. There is still snow on the ground, so it seems Christmas-y in here. Samuel is still home on leave from the Army, and is sleeping on the couch with the over-the-stove fan on high. I usually just get some coffee and sit in my chair anyway, but yesterday he said the noise of my typing kept waking him up. He stays up late watching stuff with his sisters, so I was nice this morning and am in my room. With my coffee, of course.
The princesses went to Emily's house to spend the night. She is bringing them home and picking up some of the older girls to bring ice skating. She is the best oldest child a family could have. :)
I am in an organizing mood. The little girls have been wanting me to clean out their closet for forever and a day. There are clothes hanging in there that honestly, they have not even worn. A baby dress of Emily's, Benjamin's baby overalls...a bag of cloth diapers, just in case. Just in case what, I don't know. Some of us think we need to be prepared for...something. Shelves full of Fisher-Price Little people houses...a barn, the gas station, the merry-go-round...minus most of the accessories, which have gotten lost through the years. They might be worth something, we can't get rid of them! ha. I am just done storing things that I'll never put on ebay. To the thrift store they will go, and if no one wants them - oh well.
Now I just need to figure out how to get my organizing mood transferred to actually cleaning that closet.
I don't want to do it today, it's one of Sam's last days here. He has to be back on base by midnight on the first, so we're not sure yet when he's heading back.
I also am making a new and better commitment to health: more exercise! More veggies! Going off plan for Christmas has thrown me, the sugar cravings came back with a vengeance. All I want is chocolate! I did have a few pieces yesterday, nothing crazy, but I have to stop it. I am now only two pounds over my pre-Christmas weight, down from five pounds over. Why oh why does it take so long to lose it, yet it comes back on so very quickly?
Anyway...this all leads me to a question...why when the new year rolls around do we all want to clean and organize and eat well and exercise? Is this normal, or have we all been brainwashed by advertising? I mean, look at the Target ad this week. Exercise clothes and cleaning products. Even Aldi has their usual January stock: yoga mats and hand weights.
All this re-commitment is uncomfortable. I don't want to go out in the cold for a walk! I don't want to change into work out clothes and get all sweaty! I don't like when my heart pounds and I get all tired! I want to stay comfy and warm and relaxed. The conundrum in this whole thing is that when I actually go outside that comfort zone and do the things I think I despise, I feel great...I feel accomplished. I know, I know, get off my lazy middle-aged rear end, stop talking, and just do it.
I read this blog of an overweight woman who knew she needed a huge kick in the bum for incentive, so she booked a trip with this five day mountain hike...six months from now. So she needs to lose the weight and get in shape, or else.
Paul is going to find out soon when he can get time off in the new year for our trip to Florida. The kids keep clamoring about it, they can't wait. Even the 23 hour drive is fun for them. It has been a warm winter for us, but we still haven't had the sunshine soaking into our skin...for way too long now. I just crave it.
From my cleaning and organizing yesterday afternoon, I have several bags in the back of the minivan to go to the thrift store, so I need to get moving, lest they get comfy in there and stay for a while.