a little bit of snow

Jonathan and Mali Rose

Mirielle loves to bake. When she is really busy and stressed out with school, she will just bake something when she knows she shouldn't, it's her way of dealing. This cake is no ordinary cake, it is from her special cookbook, made with melted chocolate and cocoa powder. She put coconut on only half, to please everyone. Well. I happen to LOVE both coconut, and her homemade chocolate cakes. And here I am, home on a chilly rainy day, with a half of cake on the counter. I am thinking of putting a bag over the whole thing, or putting it in the closet.

April 23rd, and snow. We didn't get much, but Rosie stuck her face in her water dish on the deck and it was full of slush. I took the short cheat-y walk because it was so cold, and slippery. Last evening I went out for a little after-dinner walk. I had already walked in the morning, and had done an afternoon workout. But I was really frustrated, and needed to get out of the house. I was not upset at anyone here, I just needed to sort out some thoughts. And get my head on straight concerning the cake Mirielle was baking, the aroma was heavenly. So out I went, without Rosie The Bad Dog to pull me around. I went down road, hearing only the scrunch scrunch of my own sneakers. Then I realized that I heard another scrunch scrunch, slightly out of sync with mine, and turned to see a guy walking behind me. Lacking my usual tact, I said, "You scared me!" He apologized. I then realized that not two seconds before this, I had...well, I had farted. Really loudly. I mean, everyone does it, right? And I was out walking all by myself. Being all grown up and dignified, I started laughing. This guy walked briskly past me as I scrunched along, laughing my head off. I do not know who he was, but he most certainly thinks I am crazy. My walk was very helpful. See, my frustration stemmed from my weight. I have gained two pounds. That might not seem like much, but that scale was going down nicely for me, small increments at a time. Over the weekend I wasn't as careful, but I thought it wouldn't hurt to cheat just a bit to fool my body, ect. And it wasn't much, just the Irish coffee on Friday, and some popcorn on Saturday night...a bite of Aaron's white chocolate bunny...ten peanut M&M's...a few bites here and there of stuff I normally avoid. Not even that much. Then I read about how it is so hard to lose weight in one's forties because of shifting hormones. And I am certain that it is much slower since I got that darned gall bladder removed. So I was upset. All this work, and I am the same weight I was a few months ago! It just isn't working anymore! So I walked. I thought, and I reasoned, and I felt sorry for myself. And I came to a conclusion: I cannot give up. I need to try to fool this stubborn body of mine. But I will not just eat cake and forget the whole thing. I may try calorie cycling, or more intense workouts. But I will not give up. That made me feel better. When I stepped on the scale this morning, and saw that yucky number, I just told it HA, you will go away never to be seen again! Dang, if only willpower alone could take away the pounds! If sheer determination made those numbers shrink! Anyway, here I am. The house is in it's comfortable Monday state. I am thinking of doing another organization project. I did the hall closet and the girls' room last week. I am thinking of the cupboards under the microwave...the ones filled with storage containers that avalanche all over the floor, when opened. If we keep them all in that cupboard, where do the missing lids go? I need to clean the laundry room too, but that is a job to do with Evelyn. She gets things done. Especially if I pay her. Camille was sad to see the kids get on the bus this morning. She wants Charlotte Claire to play with her. But she got over her sadness, and is in her own little world now...she is wearing her princess Snuggie, and playing with a whole slew of Barbies... This week I may be watching my little great nephew Davian. His mama is my sister's oldest daughter, Katie. Katie is the French teacher over at the school. She is an amazing girl...childhood leukemia survivor, she has Krohn's disease, and has suffered immensely but has still been my kids' favorite teacher. Her daughter Grace is one of the best kids in this world, I was there when she was born. So I love her like my own. Anyway, Katie and her husband have a new baby, born at the end of January, Mr. Davian. He is SO beautiful. Katie is back to work, and daddy is a stay-at-home dad. Well, he has to go in to work sometimes, and that is where I come in. I am absolutely thrilled to have a chance to take care of this little guy. So I have my work cut out for me today. The regular Monday stuff, and staying out of the cake. I feel like just eating the whole thing and ending the battle, but it don't work like that.