last day at home...

I have some lovely pictures of this crooked tree, and a few really good ones of the kids, but this internet is so slow it is going backwards.

As I got the kids ready for school this morning, which seems so easy after all the years of juggling newborns and toddlers and fixing bottles and nursing babies and changing diapers WHILE getting kids ready for school, usually on way less sleep than I would have liked....anyway, I realized that while it is easy for ME, I need to talk to Joseph and remind him of some things. On the mornings that Mirielle has early classes, he has to get them ready. It is hilarious to think that he is going to be responsible for Sonja K.'s ginger tangles. The older ones need to make sure the littles get their showers and there are enough matched socks and that they don't wear stupid clothes to school. I COULD pick them all out before I leave....

I need to remember to pack my hairbrush. Once a long time ago, when I was pregnant for Benjamin, my mother kept my two little girls, Emily and Abigail....and I went to Washington, D.C. with Paul for four days....we stayed at the Grand Hyatt, it was gorgeous...he was going to a conference for his work, and I got to go along. He was busy almost every day,(while I lounged around watching movies) but we did get to go to the Smithsonian....(it was 90 degrees and my feet were swollen...that's what I remember....no, it was fun....we went on the subway...)anyway, the point of this story is that I forgot my hairbrush. In the hotel gift shop I was able to buy: a comb. Taking care of my long tangly hair was a nightmare that week...(also, my sandal strap broke so we went and bought these cheap sneakers....ouch....)

I finally put my clothes in my suitcase last night. See, I am nervous that my luggage will get lost and I won't have anything to wear....so I put a bathing suit and undies and a skirt and a sundress and my favorite bra in a carry-on, just in case. And of course I carry my purse, which I should just stuff into the carry-on....then there is the computer, which has to be taken out of the case and scanned at security checkpoints, which I am SO looking forward to. I packed my favorite Birkenstock sandals, and am planning to wear my sneakers. But what if my luggage gets lost and I get stuck wearing my sneakers the whole week? I don't know if I can fit my sandals into my carry-on...I could stuff them in my pockets....or string them around my neck...why do I worry about these things? Why do I think that if I ignore that thought that my luggage will get lost, it WILL get lost?

We have to leave for the airport at 3-ish a.m. tomorrow morning. Yes, in the middle of the night. It will be so cold, in the twenties, much below freezing....and when we get there it will be in the eighties. What on earth does one wear to travel in?

The wedding is not spiraling out of control yet, but my estimated head count is one hundred twenty four. That is just my brothers and sister and their children with their signifigant others, and the friends in our church, not even including the younger kids, and then Ashley's side of the family. But I am not going to think about it until we come back. We are going to have 80 pounds of chicken wings, barbecued and Buffalo, veggies and dip...and perhaps some Bruschetta...I don't know. I am not going to think about it yet. Cups drinks cupcakes coffee BLAH. I am not going to think about it yet....and believe me, I am not dreading it. Once it is the time to go ahead and get moving on it, I know it will fall into place and it will be absolutely wonderful.

And now I need to go and do some laundry and sock matching so the kids will have an easier time...it is hard to leave and imagine the place running without me...will they actually take out the trash without me asking? Mirielle says she is going to make a chore list for every single day. I guess I needn't worry. (tomorrow the boys are going to a conference, Joe, Aaron, and Sam...and Mali has her S.A.T's...and I won't be here to plan and micro-manage....)

But I don't feel sorry for myself...I am still pinching myself because I think I am dreaming....we are going to one of the nicest beaches in the world!!! Oh, sun and relaxation and lovely dinners and....just being together....last year when we went to Jamaica, I looked forward to the trip, but now that I KNOW how nice it was, I am way more excited about this trip.