sunshine!

But it won't last long, the clouds and rain are coming!

The little princesses are playing dollhouse. They started setting up last night right before bedtime so they were SO HAPPY to go to bed, ha. Jonathan had dragged out a bunch of Playmobil stuff, too, so we had to pry them from their play...

Mirielle went to the pool with Jonathan and I yesterday afternoon. She swam laps while I swam around near Jonathan and tried to get as much exercise as possible while he told me about the baby chicks that are hatching in his classroom.

Home for dinner, which I had prepared and put in the oven before we left: marinated roasted chicken thighs, baked basmati rice. I also made some broccoli with cashews, and a bowl of spinach for me.

I am not starving. I am not longing to eat things I know I shouldn't. But I do find myself very impatient to lose more weight! Results, please!!! I have a niece who has had lap band surgery and lost almost 50 pounds in less time than I have taken to lose my 16. Don't get me wrong, I am extremely happy for her. But I have to admit I am jealous of the quick results.(although I know it hasn't been easy for her, either)....

I miss my mother these days. Lilacs are blooming. Yesterday I stood outside and buried my face in them, and remembered her so vividly. (one thing that fascinates me is the way smell evokes memory, but memory rarely evokes smell) She loved lilacs. I have to admit I did tweak some from bushes that did not belong to me through the years, to give to her....

What I can't believe is how strong my longing for her still is. I'll be going along fine, then from out of the blue I'll have an image of her come into my head....of her standing in our living room by the piano looking out the window....and it will actually hurt like a punch in the stomach when I realize she is gone. The same thing happens with my father, and of course with my brother....with Billy, though, the pain is much worse. I cannot comprehend why he did what he did. I try not to think about his last day, about how he could possibly plan his own death, what he must have been thinking.....I try not to think about it, but sometimes I find my thoughts going there and it always makes me cry. I am still very mad at him, but I miss him terribly.

And to think the title of this post is "sunshine!"

On to happier things.....

1. Aaron is going to Norway for a few weeks in July.

2. Mirielle, Aaron, and Mali have signed up for their classes (nursing school), and have some together, which sounds like fun to me.

3. Charlotte Claire and Camille have Fruit Striped Gum, which they do not leave in their mouths.

4. They also have out dolls and strollers and dishes. It looks like thirty little girls have been playing here instead of just two.

5. Char is dressed in her Kitty Suit, and Camille is dressed in nothing at all. I think she got distracted.

6. I think I will skip the pool today and do some other exercises.

7. I wish we had an Endless Pool.

8. I cannot wait until we open our back yard pool.

9. Our hot tub NEEDS to get fixed. I picture myself pushing myself harder while working out, with the joy of a hot tub soak set before me....

10. Coffee tastes better out of a nice mug.

11. Aaron has to get the bar taken out of his chest soon. It has been in for almost three years now.

12. I ordered three skirts, and two tops online, and the order is supposed to come today. I feel like Jonny waiting to get a Hess truck in the mail. I hope they fit!! I hope they make me look spectacular! ha.

13. The Garbage Man is here, Rosie is safely in her cage, yay!

14. Rosie seems to be feeling under the weather. She barfed on the living room floor last evening, and this morning on our walk she stopped to pee like ten times...she usually just does that once.

15. I think it might be because she chugged from the toilet last night, gross, and one of the dear children, gross, did not flush. Only number one, thankfully, but STILL.

16. Charlotte Claire is sad that Joseph mowed down the dandelions yesterday.

17. Camille is still in her Birthday Suit, as my mother used to say.

18. Blogging is a perfect way to procrastinate doing those little things around the house like getting out of my chair and heading out to the kitchen to assess the damage....

19. I matched socks last evening....in the middle of it, Mali called to be picked up from her trackmeet....I asked Joe to get her....he must've forgot, and all of the sudden, I realized ten or 15 minutes had passed and Joe hadn't left, so I just went out the door....it was pouring out, and the car Ashley drives was behind the big van....and she had the keys...so I called her on her cell phone, and she came out and drove over to get Mali for me.

20. Mali was the last one there waiting to be picked up, I felt bad for her....

21. Okay, Camille, seriously, you need to get your clothes on.

22. We are going to do something fun today.

23. The Garbage Man is gone so I have to take Rosie outside again.