beautiful summer day

I had an appointment today, took just Kathryn, Evelyn, Jonathan, and Charlotte Claire....I left Camille the incredible nursing baby home with the older kids because she was napping...I visisted my brother, brought him some of the yummy cookies my daughter made last night...then I came home, fed sweet little baby Camille who only slept for an hour (I was gone for 3!)....she went in for a nap, and I got in the pool....warm lovely wonderful, I love swimming....I feel light and healthy in the water...then sat in the sun....Emily, Abigail, Mariel, Molly, Margaret, and cousin Ellen were putting together a 750 piece puzzle between swims...

Then I got dressed, woke up Camille, fed her, dressed her up cute, and left with Mariel and her broken new bicycle....with my sister and niece Audrey, to K-mart first....40% off the clearance prices.....I bought too much....but Jon will love his Car's light up t-shirt and shorts set for $3.50....and a few shirts for the girls for 80cents...then to Sport's Authority....then to Target to return the broken Schwinn....the guy at customer service said alot of people are returning bikes...what are we supposed to do? They did take it back...then to Price-Chopper for some groceries......the little kids were already in bed when we got home, and I feel like I've missed out on a day in their lives...yet, I had some down time.....I shouldn't feel guilty because:

1. I bought some cheese for Joseph, the exact kind he requested, Swiss...

2. I bought 2 pairs of shorts for Evelyn, because she doesn't have ANY (according to her)

3. I bought no less than a dozen boxes of really good cereal for Sam.....

4. I got a whole cart-load of groceries for $110...

5. I got some really cool birthday presents for Sam's friend's birthday (2 nerf-type guns, a green reusable water-bottle, and a bag of Laffy-Taffy....)

6. I bought a few nice things for my niece for her birthday....

Okay, now the reasons I SHOULD feel guilty:

1. I spent too much money.....but everything was cheap!

2. I missed dinner with the family, and Emily was home tonight!

3. I hardly got to see Paul tonight...

4. I had talked about taking the kids to the drive-in, and they wanted to go tonight....apparently a couple of them cried when they realized it wasn't going to happen....

5. I bought a huge umbrella to put on the picnic table so we can have some shade near the pool....did we really need it, even if it was cheap?

6. I wasn't here for bedtime, and tucking in....

7. I never put the clothes I washed this morning in the dryer, so they have to be re-washed (waste of water)....but wait, how did this get in here? Does it really have anything to do with going bye-bye today?


Anyway, anything I do, I will feel some degree of guilt.....and guess what? My lovely little Camille woke up at 3:30 this morning, and stayed up for 2 hours, despite the fact that I nursed her at least 3 times....I wish I had an extra room to put her in..(I always have these dreams that I find another room in our house that is neat and clean and full of possibilities...sometimes it's a whole hallway of rooms, sometimes I realize we have a whole huge shower room, with multiple toilets....but usually it's just a really nice extra room.....we used to have a guest room, but the kids kept coming, year after year, filling all the rooms.....)(what pathetic dreams!)...me feeding her just teaches her that when she wakes up, that's what happens....I am convinced she would have gone back to sleep on her own,....she wasn't really crying, just fussing a little...but Paul has to get up and go to work in the morning, so I have to keep her a bit quiet....oh well....she is hilarious.....she kept slapping me, and waving her arms around, and trying to see in the dark....she seemed to think it was a party....

Tomorrow is the day for Aaron's eye appointment....I don't want to bring everyone! I don't want to leave everyone home! Wonder how mad Aaron would get if I re-schedule for next week....I want a nice day at home in the warm pool......