summer 2011

summer 2011

Paul and I, all 16 kids and Ashley, Benjamin's wife...Christmas 2012

Paul and I, all 16 kids and Ashley, Benjamin's wife...Christmas 2012

Sunday, November 2, 2008

I just feel like writing....

When I was younger I wanted to be a writer, after I decided I wasn't going to be an artist. I never dreamed there would be such a thing as blogs. When I was little, a computer was a machine that took up a whole room. Then as a young teenager, there were the TI(Texas Instruments)99 computers, that hooked up to the tv to play video games, a huge step upward from the Atari, which played just things like Pong and PacMan.....

I like to read, too. When I was growing up, I read everything, Reader's Digest, National Geographic, those home womens' magazines, Family circle, or whatever....and the newspaper from cover to cover.....then novels, tons of them. I remember reading the Little House books, they had only a few in our school library. Imagine my surprise when I discovered there was a whole set of them, all for sale together.....we got the set for Emily for Christmas the year our third child, Benjamin, was born. I read the whole set, 9 books I think, in one week. Then I read my sister's set of Anne of Green Gables books. Then everything I could find that John Steinbeck had written. And Taylor Caldwell....and Charles Dickens....but not Stephen King. I found his writing disturbing....I have read some more of his stuff now, he is an excellent writer. But I still find the subject matter a bit disturbing. Quite fearful. But his book, Insomnia, is great. I read that the summer after little Robert William was stillborn. I could not sleep anyway, so it was fitting. That was a wierd summer, slept all day and was up all night. I didn't recognize how depressed I was, but I had to grieve. I am glad it was in the summer, and I could do that, and get on with life. I still am sad about it, though......but I love my Jonathan all the more, as he was concieved only 6 weeks after Robert's "birth"....

Anyway, I like to write. I heard the news today that a friend in our church who has struggled with cancer for quite a few years now, has exhausted all of her treatment options and has lung cancer. She is only my age, and has seven children. She has had a bone marrow transplant. There is no longer anything that can be done, and apparently she has finally told her children that she is dying. I am very sad for her. She has had a rough few years. But I know that she gained many heavenly treasures in her suffering. What have we done with our last few years?

I like to be open with my children about death. My mother was like that with us. She always said it was part of life....and that it was the living you should fear, not the dead....I think in the United States, death is too far off. Too taboo to talk about. Kids are shielded from it. Of course it is very sad and tragic, but God is in charge of life and God is in charge of death. I have told my kids that it is God's business to decide when they die, and if they worry about it, they need to stop and just leave it up to Him. Again, it is very sad, and I don't really understand it. We form such strong attachments, and are tortured by even the thought of losing each other, but that is just the way it is.

Enough random thoughts for the night.


Janis said...

I love to read blogs and find out how much I have in common with women around the country. Your writing is perfect for a blog and you are so transparent, I love to read your blog! I too thought about being a writer as a child and frequently "published" stories on an old electric typewriter. I think it was the threat of studying grammar that turned me off to it but a blog is a perfect vehicle to express yourself!

growingupartists said...

Happy bright Monday!! Ahh, another writer/artist...from the time of Texas Instruments. Thought I'd drop you some Christmas gift ideas, why not? Only 52 more days!

Made by Coleco (remember them?)...and for $10, fun for all, as long as everyone's careful.

Enjoying your blog, thanks for letting me spill some of my own randomness onto it!