last night, i didn't get to sleep at all....

I woke u at four o'clock, and that was it...the thoughts and the plans and the ideas and the thoughts and then the "what ifs", and the thoughts....and why the heck is the bed so comfy when I have to get up and get out of it, but when I am trying like crazy to fall back to sleep, I feel lumps and bumps and aches and pains and cannot get comfy? Well, after confirming that it was five o'clock on my handy dandy cell phone, which is finally back in service, I decided not to look again. And then, after much battling and trying to think about absolutely nothing... I fell back asleep .....and thus slept twenty minutes too late.....

One of my worries was the security at the aeroport....so I drafted a letter in my head....

Dear Sirs or Madams,

I am going to be flying soon, and have some fears about going through security. I have not done anything wrong, but I always feel nervous and guilty even when I go through customs to Canada. Heck, I even feel nervous when I walk out of Walmart, since one time I set off the "YOU HAVE STOLEN SOMETHING " buzzer, even though it was only a pregnancy test that the cashier didn't de-buzzify at the register, which the nice door lady displayed to everyone who cared to know, and shouted, "I got it! It is a pregnancy test!", just in case the visual wasn't enough...and I only had like a dozen kids with me, so I didn't TOTALLY die of embarrassment...anyway, ....I do not like going through security, even though I am a nice mommy....yes, I am a mommy. I have given birth to sixteen children, well, actually seventeen even though Robert William was stillborn. So my tummy is like a big ball of pizza dough, all risen, with little rivers of stretchmarks on it. Now, I hate to be too graphic, but....my tummy tends to infringe on the top of my thighs a little, so....the thought of being searched isn't just "don't touch my junk" for me, no, it is "stay away from my tummy".....I mean, come on. Even at the doctor's office, one gets to disrobe with dignity, and sit under the paper sheet. And I have read that I shouldn't wear a skirt, because one can hide things under a skirt. Well, Mr. Tsa, that is why I am wearing a skirt!! To hide my somewhat shocking thighs, and my previously mentioned pizza dough tummy. Then I read that one shouldn't wear an underwire bra through security. What??? I should be saggy and baggy? Shall I just put on a TweetyBird shirt and some leggings, and skip the bra altogether? rrr.

Anyway....I am not as anxious about these things in the daylight.

And wedding plans....what fun! Miss Ashely is heading to Florida to spend Christmas with her mom, so we are planning via texting and phone calls. Ben called me last night, he was issued his uniform and will probably be heading to "real" basic by Wednesday, so tonight, if he gets time to call, will be the last time we can talk until he comes home. So here I am, planning a wedding for two people who are not even here. Yesterday I took Miss Ashley to the town clerk to apply for the marriage license. She has her part all filled out, and Ben will go there when he gets home, and it will be all set for the Monday after Christmas.

The kids keep asking me if they can help me wrap presents so last night on my bed, there was Evelyn and Suze and Sonja and Charlotte Claire and Camille. I would pull a gift out of the closet, determine who it was for (kids not present, of course), cut a piece of wrapping paper, and hand it over to whoever grabbed it first. Evelyn was the labeler, and I kept track of what we wrapped for whom in my trusty notebook. Camille did nothing but beg to wrap one herself and waste stickers and tape. When Paul gets home he is going to wonder what happened on his side of the bed.

Suzanne's project is due on Friday. I am trying to pack....Paul already packed, he has a stack of stuff piled next to the bed, I think it is so much easier for guys.

Mirielle just left for college. The little girls are not up yet, but I have been talking to Mirielle. She is applying for nursing school, as is Aaron, and Mali. All the same school.

Sam didn't go to school, he says he doesn't feel well.

Last night we had cereal for dinner....I also made some eggs and sausage and toast....poor Aaron came home from work at the grocery store in town, all spiffy in his long sleeved white shirt and tie, and asked what was for dinner. ouchie. So this afternoon after our dentist appointment, I shall stop at the store and get a few things and make sure I serve better dinners this week.

Mali has an infection from her wisdom teeth removal. I have to stop and get her some antibiotics this afternoon, too.

Charlotte Claire is awake, she slept in her kitty suit again. I got her the one thing she requested for Christmas, a toy kitty. It is a Fur-real kitty, it meows and purrs. I cannot wait!

And I am blabbering, I know it, so I shall sign off before I put myself to sleep....funny how it was impossible to sleep last night, but now, I could conk right here.....