can't stop thinking about jamaica....

When I was growing up, we went camping for vacations. Then my parents bought a camp on Lake Ontario when I was in 4th grade. I was by no means deprived. But kids in school went to places like Disneyworld and to the Grand Canyon and Niagara Falls, and New York City. It never even crossed my mind to think that our family would do things like that. So...fast forward a few years...I married Paul when I was eighteen years old. We were married on a Friday night...our big indulgence was staying at a Holiday Inn! And only the first night, the next night it was The Red Roof Inn, much cheaper. Then on Sunday we were back at church, back to work on Monday for both of us. So...

We had our honeymoon two years ago when we went to Jamaica for the first time. It was LOVE. Love of the people, the country, the weather, the rum, and of course each other. I finally realized why people like vacations so much. I mean, we ourselves have camped for our vacations, and although this fun, it doesn't compare to going to Jamaica with just Paul. (although if I am ever a millionaire I would LOVE to take the whole family. When we are there we keep saying how much they would like it, how much fun it would be...)

Last year we booked too late to get the place we liked so much in Jamaica, so we went to the Dominican Republic, and got upgraded to the Grand Hotel for free, and had quite the spoiled rotten good time.

This year, we are going to the place we went the first time. I am SO excited. It is only for six nights, and it goes by so fast, but part of the fun is the anticipation.

Part of the fun too, is trying to lose a few more pounds before the trip. If sheer determination alone could burn fat, I would be thin by now, but alas....there is the Calories In, Calories Out math, then there is the keeping the Bad Stuff out of my mouth, then there is the Exercising Harder thing...and then the No Excuses Not To Go To The Pool thing....

I can't just go buy all new clothes for the trip....I did get a few things on clearance at Target the other day, things that if I don't lose another few pounds will look awful....why do I do this to myself? The stuff I wore last year is just too big enough to look sloppy. Thin people can wear baggy clothes, fat people cannot. It makes me mad sometimes to see the clothes that the stores have for fat people...who in heaven's name would assume that bigger people like things with huge flowing sleeves and huge flowers and big bold prints? Fat people like to dress just like thin people do, not standing out. Just my humble opinion.

One thing I have comforted myself with is this: I had plenty of fun last year and the year before on vacation, and I was forty pounds heavier than I am now. Perhaps now I won't imagine that every single person already seated on the plane when I board will be hoping my seat isn't next to them. Perhaps I won't worry whether I will be able to get up out of the nice comfy chaise loungers next to the pool, once I have sat down...or that it will crack, and I will fall to the concrete and die of embarrassment. Perhaps I won't worry about the path I will take to and from the buffet, if I will fit between the chairs...Perhaps I won't feel self-conscious about taking so much bacon.

Anyways, I have seven weeks to work hard, with a goal in mind. I wish I had that guy from the extreme weight loss show to come and show me how to work out....

Today the kids are all home from school. They stayed up late last night and are tired and bickery. Jon thinks it is relaxing to sit there on the couch shooting his automatic Nerf gun, and drive his remote control car into the dollhouse stuff Sonja has set up all over the small rug....three times is not an accident! Kitty Kitten and Rosie are the only ones around here with any energy.

Joseph, Aaron, and Mali are back from their Adirondack hike. They drove up late Saturday night and had to sleep in the car because the campgrounds were all full with people seeking the lovely fall foliage in the seventy seven degree sunshine.

I shall get moving now....the day is sunny and warm and need some vitamin D.