morning pictures...and being tired...

Suzanne Eleanor.... Rosie

Charlotte Claire with that fresh morning look.

Rosie started barking in her cage... Because she saw this kid....

Mr. Jonathan in his new costume, brought home last night from Walmart....by....DADDY! Of course I asked how much it was....it was $4.25....it is rather out of character for Paul to bring things like this home, so it tends to be rather endearing to me. I was glad that Jon was so pleased...I think my heart would have ached if Jon was indifferent about it.

Sonja K. gets to stay home today because she has a roller skating party, which costs four dollars. She really wanted to go, so I said she could. A few of the older kids jokingly said NO FAIR. I just said "no" to those things all these years because of picking up kids instead of the busride, (just the packing up of the kids still in naps, dressing the babies, getting out the door with all the littles, ugh)....but now, it is much easier to pick someone up...but I do not have the four dollars. I asked Paul last night, but never got it out of his wallet. This morning I hit up all the big kids before they got on the bus, but no one has any money, except for a few kids with a twenty dollar bill, which they freely offered, but...anyway, she is not sad. Because she gets to stay home. Phew. I am glad staying home is so wonderful.

I also heard something this morning that made me extremely happy: Sonja said mismatched socks are in style! We shall be so stylish!

So I am tired today....part of it is my own dang fault, I stay up too late. But then at four o'clock, Paul said, "Dear, your dog is barking." Blah. She never barks during the night, so I knew she must have a reason. I came out and she was doing the wiggle dance in her cage, so I put on my jacket and took her out....it wasn't until I got down the deck steps to the driveway that the thought crossed my mind that she might have been barking at an intruder....it was dark and...well, it was dark out! But she started peeing as soon as she hit the grass, a pee that went on and on and on...poor girl!

I brought her back in the house, and she was absolutely positively crazy, going in circles and reaching up for kisses, wagging her whole body...ugh. I couldn't just put her back in the cage like that. So I sat down in my chair and had her sit near me, and I pet her and talked softly to her until she relaxed...then into the cage she went...and back to bed I went, only to toss and turn and think about things....but I don't really mind. I prayed for Martin, I prayed for Ben and Mali and my sister and my sister-in-law and their kids and I prayed for myself....

Because yesterday I had the strange experience of just being able to see myself very clearly....Oh am I miserable sometimes! I was snappy and impatient every time I turned around. When Camille poured half the box of Cap'nCrunchCrunchBerries into her bowl, overflowed all over the table and floor while I was distracted by going through some clothes in my room, blah! Then they do this thing where they just get really silly and run around and jump on things and don't listen....

Anyway, it became very clear to me that I have alot to work on.

So being awake during the night for some conversation with God is a good thing.

But today I must say, I am tired.

And, I have things to do. I have no shoes. Only Birkenstock sandals and clogs. They are too slippery for winter, and not warm enough either. Plus they look dorky with socks on. No offense to anyone, because I don't really care about the dorky part. Anyway, I am meeting Mirielle at noon at the mall near her college with the little girls.....and hopefully I will find shoes that don't hurt my feet, that are cheap, and super attractive. ha. And Mirielle needs a dress for a wedding we are attending on Saturday, which is why I need shoes all of the sudden. My brother's son is getting married....

I also want to sneak in a tanning session......

Rosie wants to go out again, the kids want breakfast, and since tomorrow is not only Veteren's Day but my Benjamin Paul's 22 nd birthday, and Paul doesn't have work, I should get this place cleaned up a bit. I cleaned under all the couches yesterday, so that is done. I don't know why that makes me feel better, but with the wood floors so much stuff gets under there..mostly dog hair and little toys and hair things....and I found a lot of socks. Socks are my number one enemy.

Benjamin Paul....my first son. He came after Emily and Abigail, when Em was almost four and Abigail was almost two. Emily was eight and a half pounds, Ab was seven, then Ben was only six pounds three ounces. He was a week early....but I remember the look on his face when he was first placed in my arms, he looked straight into my eyes....and he had red hair! My mother was thrilled. His hair is sandy colored with definite reddish highlights now. Anyway, he has always been a handful. Emily was relaxed and bookish with a huge imagination, Abigail was highstrung but always so good...then there was Ben...he jumped and climbed and learned bad words. He was always a few years ahead of himself, trying to be grown up and mature. When he was 13 he started putting notes in the Alpaca farmer down the road's mailbox, requesting a job. His perseverance paid off, they hired the kid, and he worked there on weekends and early before school sometimes for years. Anyway, lately he has grown up a lot, I am proud of him. He is a good boy, and he is leaving in 13 days.....