I am not going to complain. But I wish I could just eat whatever I darn well want to and still lose like fifty pounds. Or more. Just magically. By deciding in my mind that I want to. But nooooo, there is suffering involved. I went on my walk today! Joseph, who is on college break, gave the girls a snack while I set out. It was cold and windy, but I had sweatpants under my skirt, lovely, yes indeed. I wore only a sweatshirt, but I put the hood up and tied it tight, yes I looked lovely. Off I went. Oh my goodness I am out of shape. I looked at my phone: nine minutes had gone by! What the !!?? I had already used up all my pep talks to myself! Then came the big hill. I hate the big hill, I will never like the big hill. It was murder, torture, and suffering. I lived, barely. Then the way home...down the hill, not so bad. Then up another hill...blah. Suffering. I was just hoping none of the neighbors would come out to say hello because I really couldn't talk. I was huffing. How can anyone possibly like to excercise?
Okay. I do exaggerate. But only a little. Tomorrow I need to do battle with my mind to make myself go again...so it gets easier. Because really, it is all in the mind. Sometimes I wonder why we humans like to self-destruct. I mean, why would my OWN MIND try to tell me not to go on a walk that is good for me?
Samuel got out some Legos to play with Jon. Sonja ended up in the room on the floor playing with him. The little girls got out the Megablocks/Duplos, and now Jon is playing with a different building set with Paul. Suzanne and Sonja are going wild now, and of course that drives Miss Rosie crazy, she thinks Playtime, Playtime. They are having a pretend fight with a plastic baseball bat. One of them WILL get hurt. I just know it.
Anyway, has anyone ever noticed that when you try to eat healthier you find yourself thinking about food even more? Again, though, a battle of the thoughts. Bed time looms....if there is anything worse than waking them up in the morning, it is getting them geared toward bed, especially when they are playing so nicely. I hate being the mean mommy.
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6 comments:
I'm sorry you've had a rough day. Dieting and exercise isn't fun. I know. I wish I could avoid sweets like I can avoid dieting and exercise! ;-) Hey--email me, if you want to, about San Antonio.
mrandmrskiwi@yahoo.co.nz
I know what you mean; exercise is awful, BUT it can be somewhat better when done with someone else. See if your sister or if some of your girls will walk with you; walking and talking goes much faster!!
I wish you the best!
Carolyn
I can second just about anything you said ! Why would anyone like to exercise, my thoughts exactly ;)))
I guess it is like that..the thought of the foods you cannot have:)~When I went for a looong time without sugar I just resigned myself that yes I;m gonna want it but not eat it...over time it got easier like the sweets didn't phase me anymore. Now I have these crazy food allergies and its very difficult and I find I give myself the same pep talks you give yourself for exercise. It's hard but we have to do somehting to keep healthy.....I dont know...I guess we are all in the same boat!!!
And you know what? you ought to give yourself a pat on the back for going on that walk! Dont be too hard on yourself by thinking of yourself in a negative way! A little each day will build stamina and dont forget soon it will be spring...and walks will be fun!
Love reading about your thoughts and adventures!
some "diet foods" make me hungry. I don't understand why that is. there are some healthy choice meals that I will feel stuffed as I eat them, and then starving 20 minutes later. I stay away from them.
Also, it took about a week, but my body regulated. If you can hold out for a week of not cheating, it does get easier. Remember to eat a piece of fruit and water before you exercise.
Lot of water will help you feel fuller longer as well. I have a very hard time drinking water unless it is cold out though.
Bonnie, I know what you mean. And to top it off, my poor knees are protesting today. I am thinking to try to get to the pool today instead. And Carolyn, I shall try to take one of the girls...they love to come because when Mommy is walking up the hill and can't talk, they get to do all the talking. Tereza and Cindy - thank you for the encouragement. Cindy, you are stronger than you give yourself credit for! Thank you!
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