now it's evening, I'll try again

So, we packed into the van, myself and 8 of the kids to pick Mariel up from school....If I had thought about it a little first, I would have realized that she would want to just come home and go running. It was really nice out for that. But since I didn't think too much about it, I had a bunch of kids who were really excited about Mommy's spontaneous trip to the ice cream place, and one high school senior who wanted to go home. But Mariel was gracious about it, and we went for ice cream. The unplanned-ness(is that a word?) of it was the fun part. And just going on a little ride with them all and hearing about their day.....

So, after a dinner of marinated chicken on the grill, seasoned rice, and salad, daddy left with 4 of them for soccer practice....the little girls played outside until dark, and needed showers badly when they came in. So, we had a busy evening....now they are all tucked in except the older kids and Charlotte Claire, who had a big nap today....

Why do kids challenge their parents so much sometimes? I just don't get it. Jonathan is Mr. Nice Guy about 90% of the time, and the other 10? I don't know what to do with him. My theory is that the older kids come and go, and he gets attached to them, and feels loss of control, so he subconsciously tries to take control of things like removing his pull-up in the morning, or keeping his 1/2 full bowl of cereal on the table all morning so he can run in and nibble from it. Okay, fine. But when he hits Charlotte Claire over the head with a pail in the sandbox, then cries hysterically when I drag him away.....and he does not want to say he's sorry....I knew he wanted to, but he was just so stubborn....so I actually bribed him with a drink of my Diet Pepsi....isn't that awful? But then when he said he was sorry, and hugged her, he was so relieved. But when he doesn't listen, I hate it, because I HAVE to do something about it. And I don't like to spank. And he does this thing where he just cries really loud, and doesn't stop.....it's pretty irritating. Theoretically, I should know how to handle these sort of things by now. But what fun would that be? I think if I had 50 kids they still would differ from one another enough to keep me wondering. One thing is good though: you won't catch me thinking I know what others should be doing or not doing with their kids....oh, no. When I see a frustrated mom in the grocery store with the screaming toddler, I smile and want to say, look lady, I'm not judging you. Oh no, not me. But I have decided to give the kids lots more hugs, and tell them lots more often that I love them. So this morning, Jon was playing with his cars, and I heard him saying, "I do love you, honey, I really do love you. Do you know that? Do you know I just love love love you?"

One thing I have found useful, is to end the altercations as quickly as possible, and then when they are happy again, talk to them about their behavior. Of course they want to be good! Kids want to please their parents, deep down. But they have their natures to deal with. It isn't always easy for them. And to praise them when they DO listen...like the other day, we were walking down the sidewalk while shopping, and I saw Jon making a beeline for the trash-can. "No, don't touch that Jon!" And to my utter surprise, he stopped in his tracks and didn't touch it! I told him how good that was that he listened. I explained how dirty and germy it was, and how nice it was that he didn't touch it. It was a small thing, but he was just so proud of himself.

I need to go shopping again. Mariel is making Suzanne's lunch for tomorrow, and the pickins' are slim. There is no fresh fruit, and the baby carrots are almost gone. The bread is almost gone, as is the milk. Paul just found a mystery can in the cupboard. One of the kids removed the label who knows when...Mariel is guessing green beans.

Tomorrow, she is staying home from school because she is done with the important stuff, and we will go shopping. I have to sign off - we are making a meal plan again, it worked last week. Except I wasted an 18 dollar pork roast. I so smartly put it in the crock-pot on Friday night, to eat on Saturday, and programmed it for 10 hours. An never turned it on. So on Saturday morning, it was just sitting there in the crockpot, with bacteria multiplying....it was sad to waste so much food, but what can I say? Frustrating!! It keeps me humble. It will surely come to mind when one of the kids does something stupid. I hope I remember it so I can be merciful.

Well, I have to go get the clothes out of the dryer, and put the towels in the dryer. And get the little girl's clothes out for tomorrow. And get that meal plan started....