tomorrow's mother's day

and I just saw the Duggar family on a video, they were on tv again, and announced they are expecting their 18th....I was watching with my daughter, and saying, "It's no fair! She gets presents! She gets pearls, and a ring!..." I said, wait, I've been pregnant more than her, 17 babies and 4 miscarriages....she had two sets of twins and cheated! But I am kind of kidding. I seriously don't mean to knock them. They are doing a wonderful thing. but could I put my family on tv? They wouldn't go for it, no way. My older ones don't want their identidy to be "from a big family"...and to me, we are just so normal. If I wrote here what Emily, Abigail, M., Molly, Margaret, and Kathryn talked about this evening, rolling around and laughing, you wouldn't believe it. Kathryn is 10, so they decided to tell her all about getting her period...among other things...girls can be surprisingly slobby. They would kill me if they knew I was writing this, and I better watch out, because Aaron reads it....

But how can they afford 4 washers and 4 dryers?

Well, anyway, I wanted to devote a mother's day article to my mother. I don't even know what I want to say, except that I miss her. She cared. When my child lost a tooth, she cared. When they got %100 on a spelling test (Suzanne was a STELLAR SPELLER this week!), she cared. Oh dear, if one of them got a skinned knee, or a detention in school, she cared. And, she remembered. She remembered their birthdays, of course. But she also remembered that Claire , my sister's daughter, stood up at Grandparents Day in kindergarten, and announced that HER gramma (my mother) could take out her teeth! She remembered who had the chicken pox, and when. She remembered who was allergic to what, and when we found out. She remembered all their favorite colors, foods, and books. And she gave. She gave money, she gave gifts...when she came over here, sometimes she had something for every single one of these guys. I couldn't leave their house emptyhanded, ever. I don't think I ever actually did. And she was never bored. She was never a "downer" to be around, or to talk to. Even when times were tough, and she felt awful, she was optimistic. When I was growing up, we were poor, and I didn't really realize it. She liked to draw directly on the kitchen table, then wash it off....she liked to make snowflakes and those chains of girls holding hands, with scissors and folded paper. She sewed me dresses and tops from the Sears catalog without even a pattern. She told me I was beautiful all the time. She was always game for some fun. When we were younger, she liked to play cards with us. She loved going for long walks. She loved sitting on the beach when the moon shone on the water. She liked marshmallows with toasted coconut on them. She drank her coffee black, and cold coffee was fine with her. She kept our house so clean and nice when we were growing up. I remember coming home from school, and she was always there wanting to hear about my day. My friends loved her, because she listened to them, too. She had time for everyone. Our house was the "Kool-Aid" house, the house that we could bake cookies in, that every one could gather at. She was my friend. Sometimes I see old people in the store, I see their wrinkled hands, and their old people shuffle, and I want to make friends with them. I want my mother back. I want to just sit around and drink coffee and talk to her for an afternoon. I want to take her to chinese.