another running around day....and matching socks

I now have a full laundry basket full of matched socks...but I must confess I have another one full of unmatched socks...I gave up on it, it was simply too much fun for these guys....yeah, and we have hundreds of toys....

Camille with Suzanne Eleanor, 7.....Suzanne always wears Gramma's nightgown....it comforts me to see her in it, and she just loves it....(she even wore it camping, and at the campfires...)...I miss my mother so much. She died two years ago last week....and it seems impossible that it has been two years since she called me and asked me what I was doing.... Today, I had the ultimate fun: getting Margaret in for a braces estimate....how can they cost $4700? We get a discount for having 3 kids already braced and unbraced. We spent some time in there with Camille, Jonathan, Sonja, Abigail, Mariel, and Margaret. Mr. Jon had so much energy.....I gave him 37 cents, and told him if he was good I'd buy him a drink later. For some reason, the kids like having special drinks, like iced-teas or Gatorades (which I buy in Big Lots for cheap)....so he held out, and was pretty good. Then to Wegmans for some produce, and chicken breast for $1.99 a pound.....then two more stores for various things, then home to make dinner.....when I got home, the kids went in the pool, and I really wished I was a kid, too. But after dinner, I had Joseph do the dishwasher, Sam clear the table, and Aaron sweep while I went in the hot tub with the little ones.....(Abigail, Molly, and Margaret were gone to a friend's place).....so I didn't do too badly. But: do not ever think you can relax in a hot tub with Miss Charlotte Claire in attendance. She wears a swimvest, but is not afraid to go under....the water isn't very hot, only 95 or so......but she just dives...and grabs Jon so he goes under....I have to keep my eyes on her every second.....I try not to hold on to her too much, she seems to be learning to hold her breath when she dives....but I sure pull her up when she goes under...and she has that grin on her face everytime....I finally decided I had had enough, and got out slightly more stressed than when I got in....and found that Camille had woke up from her little nap.....finally got her back to bed, Charlotte Claire settled in, and the kids in the crazy room relatively quiet.....ahhhh.....peace and quiet. For those who have to much of it, it is suffocating....but for us mommies....delicious.....then I think of their innocent faces, and feel guilty for feeling this way.

This week is busy because we are trying to prepare meals for next week, when we are at our church conference....I have already packed the kids' clothes in the camper, as well as mine....and heck, I saved a step: my pillow is already in there! I mean, why bring it in now? (I am using a spare one, not the same, but sleepable)....I feel right now that I am at that point in getting ready where the brain just goes numb....

I had something that reminded me of my father the other day....my father died only 7 months after my mom passed away.....he had leukemia, and his blood wasn't clotting....he died of a sudden brain hemorrage......and I still feel bad, because: my dad had a very good heart, but he was gruff, and he worried about everything....after my mom died, he quite almost burdensome to talk to sometimes....so that morning that he had his stroke, a Saturday in January, I woke up

thinking, I JUST DON'T WANT TO GO DOWN THERE TODAY! I hemmed and hawed, didn't want to leave my cozy house.....then my brother called and and said Grampa (he was only 70) had numbness in his arm, and felt strange, and got up and fell on the floor...so he called the ambulance......I went right up to the hospital, of course, and by the time I got to see him, he had lost consciousness....but we (my six siblings and I, and some of the 40-something grandchildren) all talked to him, and told him we loved him, because we didn't know if he could still hear us....bu evening, we knew from CAT scans that his brain was severly damaged from the blood, and he wouldn't make it through.....my sister and I were in there with him when he stopped breathing, and boy it hurt. It was a relief to have his suffering stop, we didn't know how much he was conscious of, but his breathing was rough.....but it hurt......both of my parents, dead and gone. I miss them so much....anyway, the other day I had a fruit bun...it was like a cinnamon bun, only with candied fruit, like in a fruit cake, which my father loved, and frosting on top....he would have loved it....sometimes it seems like no time at all has passed, and I can just see their faces, or hear the things they used to say.....I love to dream about them, how can my mind see them so clearly in sleep? I am very tired right now, Miss Charlotte Claire was up at 6:30 this morning....I gave her a bottle and put her back to bed, but I couldn't fall back asleep, partly because Camille was awake......anyway, I am tired, and I know I am rambling....sorry!